Silas
Beloved of All
Your prayer carries a deep sense of distress, and I can hear how much these dreams trouble you. The recurring images of being placed in situations and around people you do not choose, of losing connections that matter to you, stir up a very real fear. But I want to direct your focus away from the content of the dreams for a moment and toward the very heart of the matter.
The vertical plane, your relationship with God, is the axis upon which everything else revolves. When fear rises and the mind spins through unwanted scenarios, that is a signal to come back to that first relationship. So many times we spend our energy trying to manage every horizontal relationship and situation. We frantically work to control what people do, to force outcomes, and to flee from what we dread. Yet while you are working on all those external things, the real need is to get the center right. If your relationship with God is what it should be, the other things begin to find their proper balance. You cannot hope to have lasting peace in any other area unless this primary relationship is in order.
The dreams you describe seem to be filled with a loss of control. You are moved against your will. You are placed among people who exert the wrong kind of influence. But consider this: God does not want a relationship where you are simply trying to control Him, as if He were a servant obligated to follow your commands. He is not a servant. The fact that He does answer and care for you is a sign of His tremendous love and grace. True peace does not come from finally getting everyone and everything in your life arranged exactly as you demand. True peace is the natural result of the relationship itself. Just as fruit develops because the branch is attached to the vine, a sound mind and a restful spirit develop because you are abiding in Christ. The apple does not struggle to grow; it simply hangs on the tree. If you are abiding in Him, the fruit of His Spirit will develop, pushing out the anxiety.
You asked God to change the hearts of your relations and to unite you with them. You asked for a job and a certain distance. But God is asking you something first: Do you love Him supremely? Does this intimate relationship with Him take precedence over even these pressing concerns? When the center of your life is a loving, living relationship with your Father, you will have a right relationship with your possessions, knowing they are His, and you will defeat the accuser every time you meet him. You rebuke and bind these nightmares, but turning back to a panic-driven, ritualistic attempt to force things will leave you in bondage to the fear. Instead, let His perfect love, which casts out fear, become your foundation.
As you seek your close relations and a new place to live, do not let the master passion of your life become the desire to control the outcome. Do not let the fear of unwanted people become the thing that dictates your steps. Lay down the struggle to make every external detail happen on your own terms and in your own timing. Go back to the vertical axis. When you are in that right, loving relationship with God, trusting how deeply He knows you and what you need, you will find that He is able to lead you. Not to places of wrong control, but to a place of His choosing, which is full of safety. Let Him be your Father, not just a name you call upon, but the one who holds your very life. In that abiding place, the haunting dreams lose their power, and you will find that the other relationships begin to work out in ways you could not engineer yourself.
The vertical plane, your relationship with God, is the axis upon which everything else revolves. When fear rises and the mind spins through unwanted scenarios, that is a signal to come back to that first relationship. So many times we spend our energy trying to manage every horizontal relationship and situation. We frantically work to control what people do, to force outcomes, and to flee from what we dread. Yet while you are working on all those external things, the real need is to get the center right. If your relationship with God is what it should be, the other things begin to find their proper balance. You cannot hope to have lasting peace in any other area unless this primary relationship is in order.
The dreams you describe seem to be filled with a loss of control. You are moved against your will. You are placed among people who exert the wrong kind of influence. But consider this: God does not want a relationship where you are simply trying to control Him, as if He were a servant obligated to follow your commands. He is not a servant. The fact that He does answer and care for you is a sign of His tremendous love and grace. True peace does not come from finally getting everyone and everything in your life arranged exactly as you demand. True peace is the natural result of the relationship itself. Just as fruit develops because the branch is attached to the vine, a sound mind and a restful spirit develop because you are abiding in Christ. The apple does not struggle to grow; it simply hangs on the tree. If you are abiding in Him, the fruit of His Spirit will develop, pushing out the anxiety.
You asked God to change the hearts of your relations and to unite you with them. You asked for a job and a certain distance. But God is asking you something first: Do you love Him supremely? Does this intimate relationship with Him take precedence over even these pressing concerns? When the center of your life is a loving, living relationship with your Father, you will have a right relationship with your possessions, knowing they are His, and you will defeat the accuser every time you meet him. You rebuke and bind these nightmares, but turning back to a panic-driven, ritualistic attempt to force things will leave you in bondage to the fear. Instead, let His perfect love, which casts out fear, become your foundation.
As you seek your close relations and a new place to live, do not let the master passion of your life become the desire to control the outcome. Do not let the fear of unwanted people become the thing that dictates your steps. Lay down the struggle to make every external detail happen on your own terms and in your own timing. Go back to the vertical axis. When you are in that right, loving relationship with God, trusting how deeply He knows you and what you need, you will find that He is able to lead you. Not to places of wrong control, but to a place of His choosing, which is full of safety. Let Him be your Father, not just a name you call upon, but the one who holds your very life. In that abiding place, the haunting dreams lose their power, and you will find that the other relationships begin to work out in ways you could not engineer yourself.
