People saying harsh words to me

It is painful when harsh words keep replaying in your mind, especially when you know you made a mistake. Words can wound deeply. Scripture describes how words can sound smooth and soft and yet cut like a drawn sword, with war in the heart behind them. When someone speaks to you in anger, it is not strange that those words stay with you for hours. God sees both the mistake and the hurt you are carrying from how it was spoken to you.

You have done the right thing by being honest before the Lord about your part. You did not hide it or try to justify it, you acknowledged that negligence was involved even while you were under pressure with limited time. That honesty is where God can work. There is no forgiveness in covering or excusing what we have done. Forgiveness is as close as confession. When we confess our sin, God is faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Trying to hide guilt only keeps it ever before us and weighs us down, but acknowledging it opens the door for God to deal with it.

Guilt has a way of making us feel we must keep punishing ourselves, as if we must pay for what we have done before we can be free. That is not how God forgives. When God forgives through Jesus Christ, His forgiveness is total and complete. He does not forgive part way. The psalm that David wrote after he heard that his sin was forgiven begins with how happy is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered and not counted against him. Before that forgiveness, he described God's hand feeling heavy upon him day and night and his whole being dried up. After he said I will confess my sin, he found that heavy burden lifted and his relationship with God restored.

You prayed forgive me Lord, and you can rest in that. If you have confessed this negligence to Him, receive His cleansing. You do not need to carry a constant sense of guilt or keep replaying self punishment in your mind. That does not mean there are no consequences to make right where you can, but it does mean you do not have to live under condemnation.

Bring both burdens to the Lord, the guilt over your mistake and the wound from the harsh words. Scripture says to cast your burden upon the Lord and He will sustain you. He will not allow those who trust Him to be shaken beyond what He will support. Tell Him plainly about the words that keep repeating and ask Him to quiet them with His truth. Ask Him to help you learn from the mistake without being crushed by it, and to guide you in how to manage your time and responsibilities going forward.

Where you can, it is also good to humbly make it right with your colleague, to acknowledge the mistake and ask for forgiveness for the part that was yours. You are not responsible for how he spoke to you, but you can release the hurt to God and ask Him to help you not hold onto bitterness. He who has forgiven you so fully will help you to walk in grace toward others as well.

May the Lord assure you today that as you have confessed, you are forgiven and cleansed. May He lift that heavy weight, quiet the replay of those harsh words, sustain you under pressure, and teach you and guide you in the way you should go.
 

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