We have read your request and we stand with you in prayer, for we understand how heavy and confusing this burden must feel and we do not take lightly what you have shared. You are right to discern that the enemy seeks to sow division and confusion in families, for our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world’s rulers of the darkness of this age, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places Ephesians 6:12. We commend you for wanting to honor your parents even in this very difficult circumstance, for this aligns with the commandment that you shall honor your father and your mother Exodus 20:12 and Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right Ephesians 6:1-2, yet honoring does not mean accepting or enabling what is impure or unhealthy. What you describe, an obsessive and jealous attachment from your mother toward you her son that feels incestuous and makes you uncomfortable, is not from God and is not how a godly parent is called to love a child. God has established clear boundaries for purity and for family relationships, you shall not approach any close relative to uncover nakedness Leviticus 18:6 and flee sexual immorality 1 Corinthians 6:18, and every unnatural thought or possessive jealousy should be taken captive and made obedient to Christ 2 Corinthians 10:5.
We also hear your honest struggle with almost feeling hatred toward her, and we gently rebuke that hatred while having deep compassion for why you feel it. Do not give the devil an opportunity Ephesians 4:27 and do not let the sun go down on your wrath Ephesians 4:26, for if someone says, I love God, and hates his brother, he is a liar 1 John 4:20. We are called to love even those who cause us pain and to forgive just as God also in Christ forgave you Ephesians 4:32 and to love your enemies and pray for those who mistreat you Matthew 5:44. That does not mean you must remain in close, uncomfortable situations without boundaries, it means we ask God to guard your heart from bitterness and to fill you with His love and discernment.
We rejoice that you desire to seek a Christian wife and to pursue marriage in a way that honors God, for this is good and right. Marriage is to be held in honor among all Hebrews 13:4 and a man will leave his father and his mother and will be joined to his wife Genesis 2:24. We encourage you to continue in courtship with the goal of marriage to a fellow believer, for we are not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers 2 Corinthians 6:14 and whosoever finds a wife finds a good thing Proverbs 18:22. Keep yourself pure and above reproach as you wait upon the Lord, fleeing fornication and trusting that God will lead you to a godly spouse in His timing.
We also affirm your prayer for your mother to find her fulfillment in Christ and for your parents marriage to be strengthened, for that is exactly where her heart should find rest. In your presence is fullness of joy Psalm 16:11 and whom have I in heaven but you, there is no one on earth whom I desire besides you Psalm 73:25. A wife is called to respect her husband and a husband to love his wife Ephesians 5:33, and when Christ is at the center, marriage reflects His covenant love.
We pray together for you now. Heavenly Father, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ, for there is no other name under heaven by which we must be saved Acts 4:12 and through Him we have access to Your throne of grace. Lord, we lift up this son to You and ask that You surround him with Your peace which surpasses all understanding Philippians 4:7, guard his heart and mind, and give him wisdom liberally as You promise to those who ask James 1:5. We ask that You deliver his mother from every impure, obsessive and jealous spirit, that she would be transformed by the renewing of her mind Romans 12:2, that she would find her complete fulfillment and joy in Christ alone and be washed and renewed by Your Spirit Titus 3:5. We rebuke the schemes of the enemy over this family and command every work of darkness to flee as we submit ourselves to You James 4:7. Father, we pray You would bless and strengthen the marriage of his father and mother, knit their hearts together in love Colossians 3:14, restore honor and purity and faithful love between them, and make their union a testimony of Your grace. We ask that You remove any hatred or resentment from this son's heart and replace it with godly love, firm boundaries, and forgiveness, and that You protect him as he seeks a Christian wife, leading him to a godly woman who loves You, and keeping his path pure until marriage. We thank You that You are faithful to deliver, to heal, and to make all things new. We pray this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, amen.
We encourage you to continue to honor your parents from a place of godly boundaries, to involve your father and a trusted pastor or mature Christian counselor for wisdom and accountability, to keep your eyes fixed on Christ, and to pray without ceasing 1 Thessalonians 5:17. God sees your struggle, He honors your desire to do what is right, and He will be your refuge and fortress Psalm 91:2 as you walk in obedience. We are continuing to pray that God will bring healing to your mother, strength to your parents marriage, freedom from this oppression, and a godly marriage for you in His perfect time.
