We understand the deep longing in your heart for freedom from the weight of bitterness and the burden of unforgiveness. The pain you describe is real, and the weariness of carrying it for so long is something our Lord sees and cares about deeply. The desire for joy instead of depression is a godly one, and we commend you for seeking to do what is right in God’s eyes. Let us turn to Scripture, which offers both the truth to set you free and the strength to walk in it.
The Bible tells us in **Psalm 34:18**, *"Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit."* He is close to you in this moment, and He longs to lift this crushing weight from you. Yet, the path to joy is not found in simply wishing away the pain but in surrendering it to Christ and obeying His command to forgive. **Ephesians 4:31-32** says, *"Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outcry, and slander be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you."* Forgiveness is not optional for the believer—it is the evidence of a heart transformed by the gospel. Jesus said in **Matthew 6:14-15**, *"For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you don’t forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses."* This is a sobering truth, but it is also the path to your freedom.
You ask for insight into the person who has hurt you, and while understanding can be helpful, we must be careful not to let it become an excuse to withhold forgiveness. **Proverbs 4:23** warns, *"Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it is the wellspring of life."* Protecting your heart does not mean building walls of bitterness but guarding it with the truth of God’s Word and the power of His love. You may never fully understand why this person has caused you such pain, but you can trust that God sees it all and will bring justice in His time. **Romans 12:19** reminds us, *"Don’t seek revenge yourselves, beloved, but give place to God’s wrath. For it is written, 'Vengeance belongs to me; I will repay, says the Lord.'"*
True joy is not the absence of pain but the presence of Christ in the midst of it. **Nehemiah 8:10** declares, *"The joy of Yahweh is your strength."* When you release this burden to Him, He will replace your sorrow with His peace. Forgiveness is not a one-time act but often a daily choice to surrender your pain to Jesus. It does not mean what was done to you was right or that you must trust this person again—it means you are choosing to trust *God* with your pain instead of letting it control you.
Let us also address the desire to "do the right thing in everything so that you will not be burdened or depressive." While this is a noble goal, we must remember that our righteousness comes not from our own efforts but from Christ alone. **Matthew 11:28-30** says, *"Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart; and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."* Striving in your own strength will only lead to more weariness, but walking in obedience to Christ—including forgiveness—brings true rest.
Lastly, we notice that your request does not invoke the name of Jesus, and we must gently but firmly remind you that there is no other name by which we can approach the Father. **John 14:6** says, *"Jesus said to him, 'I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.'"*, and **Acts 4:12** declares, *"There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men by which we must be saved!"* If you have not yet surrendered your life to Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, we urge you to do so today. Confess your sins, believe in His death and resurrection for your salvation, and invite Him to reign in your heart. It is only through Him that you can experience true forgiveness—both receiving it and extending it—and the joy that comes from a heart made new.
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Let us pray together for you:
Heavenly Father, we lift up this precious soul to You, knowing that You see every tear they have shed and every wound they have carried. Lord, we ask that You would break the chains of bitterness and unforgiveness that have bound them for so long. Fill them with Your Holy Spirit, who is the Comforter, and replace their sorrow with Your joy, which is their strength. Give them the grace to forgive as You have forgiven them in Christ Jesus. Help them to release this pain into Your hands, trusting that You will bring justice and healing in Your perfect timing.
Lord, we pray for divine insight, not so they may harbor resentment, but so they may see this person through Your eyes and respond with Your love. Guard their heart, Father, and teach them to lean on You rather than their own understanding. Remind them that their righteousness is found in Christ alone, and that walking in obedience to You is the path to true freedom.
If they have not yet surrendered their life to Jesus, we pray that today would be the day of salvation for them. Open their eyes to see their need for a Savior, and draw them to Yourself. Let them experience the peace that comes from being reconciled to You through the blood of Jesus.
We rebuke the spirit of depression and heaviness in the name of Jesus Christ. We declare that the joy of the Lord is their strength, and that they will walk in victory over this pain. Thank You, Father, for Your faithfulness and for the healing You are bringing even now. In the mighty and holy name of Jesus Christ, we pray. Amen.