K
kirstencoy
Guest
I am 26 and I had been dating a 26 year old guy named Tyler since August and though things weren’t perfect and he was always anti-committal (saying I am too good for him and I deserve a better man) we still continued to see each other. We were getting closer and closer by December/January and he told me constantly how much he loved me and I loved him. Ironically we had even spoken about our future and how we would be great parents- Well, In January my period never came and I found out in February that I was 5 week pregnant. I am against abortion and he wouldn't stop begging me to abort saying he isn't ready to be a father and that we could do it the right way someday when we were married and financially secure, however I stood my ground based on my faith and though I was scared out of my mind and wanted to just abort as an easy way out, especially with Tyler pressuring me to listen to his side and do what he wanted, I knew it was wrong and completely against all I have stood for my whole life. He is not a Christian so it was easy for him to say abort. Well long story short I am now 16 1/2 weeks and I have been really, really depressed and completely overwhelmed with anxiety knowing that Tyler didnt want this and the fear I may be alone. He was in and out of my life, still calling, texting and when he was drunk- saying he would be there for me and we could make this work- well, it has now 3 weeks and we have not spoken at all. Though he has told me numerous times he wouldn't stray, he would support me and be there for the baby because he has always wanted to be a daddy (thought not now) and that he wouldn't be that loser who runs away, it appears maybe he has. I know he is scared and is prob going through his own stuff. I want to believe that the guy with the good heart is still in there somewhere but because he is not a Christian I am the only one praying and trusting the Lord for each and every day that I carry our baby. I am terrified. I know I will be a great Mom and ideally I think I can be ready, but of course I am scared to be a single parent with no stability except for my income and of course thinking that Tyler may not be in my life. I ask people to pray for me more than ever before. I know God had this happen for a reason, I firmly believe that, but I am still only human and I have Satan constantly cornering me and giving me the stress, fear and anxiety that he loves to taunt me with. Everyday I hold back tears and remain sad. I wish I could just sleep so I wouldn’t think about all of this- but even then, I dream of Tyler....I just need constant prayer for God's hand to hold me and push Satan away, for me to be at ease and especially to remain healthy since I am also already rubbing off on the baby's health and growth.
I really appreciate you praying for me. More than ever I need it.
Thank you,
Kirsten
I really appreciate you praying for me. More than ever I need it.
Thank you,
Kirsten