We hear your deep distress and concern for your mother, and we come before the Lord with heavy hearts, seeking His wisdom, intervention, and justice in this situation. First, let us address the matter of your language—using profanity or vulgar terms, even in frustration, does not honor God or the sacredness of the relationships He has entrusted to us. The Bible warns us in Ephesians 4:29, "Let no corrupt speech proceed out of your mouth, but such as is good for building up as the need may be, that it may give grace to those who hear." We encourage you to guard your tongue, even in moments of anger or exhaustion, and to speak in a way that reflects the love and holiness of Christ.
Now, let us turn to the heart of your request. Your mother’s well-being is clearly a priority for you, and her condition requires compassionate, thoughtful care. The challenges you face with your husband—his reluctance to provide even basic necessities like a small refrigerator or air conditioning, his financial decisions regarding your mother’s account, and his apparent lack of concern for her comfort—are deeply troubling. Scripture is clear about the responsibility we have to honor and care for our parents. In 1 Timothy 5:8, we read, "But if anyone doesn’t provide for his own, and especially his own household, he has denied the faith, and is worse than an unbeliever." This verse speaks not only to physical provision but also to the love, dignity, and respect that should be shown to those in our care, especially the vulnerable.
Your husband’s actions—or lack thereof—raise serious concerns about his heart and his commitment to honoring your mother as Scripture commands. His behavior seems selfish, controlling, and unloving, which is not the way a godly husband or son-in-law should conduct himself. Proverbs 21:13 warns, "Whoever stops his ears at the cry of the poor, he will also cry out, but shall not be heard." If he is withholding even the most basic comforts from your mother, he is not only failing her but also grieving the heart of God. We must also address the financial aspect of this situation. The attempt to take a large sum of money from your mother’s account for his own use is alarming. This could be considered exploitation, especially given her condition, and it is not only unethical but sinful. Proverbs 28:24 says, "Whoever robs his father or his mother and says, 'It’s not wrong,' is a partner with a destroyer." We must rebuke this behavior in the strongest terms and call him to repentance.
You mentioned that your mother’s caregiver also struggles with health issues, particularly in the heat. This adds another layer of urgency to the need for air conditioning. Your husband’s resistance to providing this is not only unreasonable but potentially dangerous. James 4:17 reminds us, "To him therefore who knows to do good, and doesn’t do it, to him it is sin." If he has the means to provide these things and refuses, he is sinning against your mother and against God.
We also want to gently but firmly address the state of your marriage. The way your husband is treating you and your mother suggests a deeper spiritual issue. A marriage should be a partnership rooted in love, mutual respect, and a shared commitment to honoring God. Ephesians 5:25 commands husbands, "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself up for it." If your husband is not living out this command, it may be time to seek godly counsel—perhaps from a pastor or a trusted Christian mentor—to address these issues in a way that honors God and seeks restoration.
Now, let us pray together for this situation, lifting it up to the Lord who sees all and is a refuge for the weary and oppressed.
Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this sister and her mother to You. Lord, You see the struggles she faces—the exhaustion, the frustration, and the heartache of watching her mother suffer while her husband resists providing even the most basic care. Father, we ask that You would soften his heart. Break through his stubbornness and selfishness, and replace them with compassion, generosity, and a desire to honor You in how he treats his wife and mother-in-law. Lord, we pray for Your protection over this mother, who is vulnerable and in need of proper care. Provide for her needs, both physically and emotionally, and surround her with people who will love and honor her as You command.
Father, we also lift up this marriage to You. Where there is strife, bring peace. Where there is selfishness, bring repentance. Where there is hardness of heart, bring conviction and transformation. Help this sister to respond in a way that honors You, even in her frustration. Give her wisdom, strength, and patience as she navigates this difficult season. Lord, we ask that You would intervene in the financial matters as well. Expose any wrongdoing, and lead them to handle money in a way that is just, generous, and pleasing to You.
Finally, Lord, we ask that You would draw this family closer to You. May they seek Your will above all else, and may Your love and truth guide their decisions. We ask all of this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, the One who came to heal the brokenhearted and set the captives free. Amen.
In this difficult time, we encourage you to lean on the Lord and seek His wisdom daily. Proverbs 3:5-6 reminds us, "Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths." You are not alone in this struggle. God sees your faithfulness and your love for your mother, and He will sustain you. If possible, seek out a trusted pastor or Christian counselor who can provide guidance and support as you navigate this challenging situation. Stand firm in your faith, and trust that God will work all things together for good, even when the path is difficult.
