I am going through a lot right now and I started crying in front of my mother and was visibly upset during a conversation. My mother has something really spiritually wrong with her and other people have noticed it. There are a number of things that may have caused this. She has deep emotional/behavioral problems that are likely a result of whatever is wrong with her spiritually. When she sees someone upset, instead of being normal and trying to comfort them, she will act more unhinged and that's what she's doing to me right now. I'm trying to not react to her behavior because I know it's really not her fault but this is SO hard. She has been this way my entire life and it's caused my own mental and emotional issues. Thank you.
Mother
- Thread starter Dhitlor
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We hear your heart and the deep pain you are carrying right now, and we are lifting you up before the Lord together. To weep in front of your mother and instead of receiving comfort to be met with more unhinged behavior is so wounding, and we understand how exhausting it is to try not to react when this has been a pattern for your entire life. We see your compassion in recognizing that there is something spiritually wrong affecting her, and we also see the toll this has taken on your own mental and emotional health. The Lord sees your tears and He is near to you in this moment.
Psalm 34:18 says Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. And Psalm 147:3 says He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds. We pray for that healing for you, for the wounds that have built up over many years of living with this instability.
We want to speak gently and biblically into what you described about your mother. We believe you are discerning rightly that this is not merely a personality conflict but has a spiritual dimension. Ephesians 6:12 reminds us For our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world's rulers of the darkness of this age, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. When a person is under spiritual oppression or bondage, it can manifest in deep emotional and behavioral problems, in an inability to show empathy, and in reacting with confusion or agitation when comfort is needed. We do not excuse sin or harmful behavior, because each of us is still responsible before God, but we do recognize that the enemy seeks to steal, kill, and destroy families, and we must pray for deliverance and truth to break through. At the same time, God calls us to honor our father and mother as Exodus 20:12 teaches, and part of that honor as an adult can mean loving her, praying fervently for her, forgiving her as Christ has forgiven us, and also establishing healthy, biblical boundaries so that you are not continually wounded. Ephesians 4:32 says And be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you. Forgiveness does not mean denying the hurt or pretending the behavior is normal, it means releasing her into God's hands for Him to judge and to heal.
We encourage you not to carry this burden alone. Jesus invites you in Matthew 11:28 Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. And 1 Peter 5:7 tells us to be casting all your worries on him, because he cares for you. We encourage you to continue to guard your own heart by not reacting in the flesh but responding by the Spirit. Proverbs 15:1 says A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. When you feel yourself becoming overwhelmed, it is wise and biblical to step away quietly, to pray, to breathe, and to seek the Lord's peace before continuing the conversation. We also encourage you to seek ongoing godly counsel, whether a wise pastor or a biblically grounded Christian counselor, who can walk with you over time and help you process the long term effects this has had on you and help you learn how to set loving limits while still honoring your mother. The Lord wants to restore what has been broken in you.
We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus, and we want to lovingly remind you that it is only through Him that we have access to the Father and find true healing and salvation. John 14:6 says Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. And Acts 4:12 says There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved. If you have not already, we encourage you to confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, for Romans 10:9 says that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. It is in His name that we can boldly bring your mother and your own heart before God and expect Him to move.
We join together in prayer for you now.
Father in heaven, in the name of Jesus Christ we come before You and we lift up this dear one who is weary and hurting. Lord, You see every tear and You know the weight of carrying this burden for a lifetime. We ask You to wrap Your comfort around this heart right now, to give rest to the weary soul and to heal the deep emotional wounds that have accumulated over many years. Lord, we also lift up this mother to You. You know what is spiritually wrong and what is oppressing her. We rebuke the spiritual forces of darkness that have influenced her mind and behavior, and we ask in Jesus name for deliverance, for clarity, for conviction and for healing in her. Bring light into darkness, Lord, and let Your truth set her free. Help this child to walk in forgiveness while also walking in wisdom, to honor You and to honor their mother without being destroyed by the dysfunction. Give discernment to know when to speak and when to quietly step away, and give strength to not react in anger or despair but to bear the fruit of Your Spirit in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, and self control. Provide godly support, wise counsel, and a community that will come alongside and encourage. We ask that You restore what the enemy has stolen and that You use this pain for Your glory and for good as only You can, for Romans 8:28 says We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose. We pray all of this in the mighty and saving name of Jesus Christ, our only hope and our healer, amen.
Psalm 34:18 says Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. And Psalm 147:3 says He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds. We pray for that healing for you, for the wounds that have built up over many years of living with this instability.
We want to speak gently and biblically into what you described about your mother. We believe you are discerning rightly that this is not merely a personality conflict but has a spiritual dimension. Ephesians 6:12 reminds us For our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world's rulers of the darkness of this age, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. When a person is under spiritual oppression or bondage, it can manifest in deep emotional and behavioral problems, in an inability to show empathy, and in reacting with confusion or agitation when comfort is needed. We do not excuse sin or harmful behavior, because each of us is still responsible before God, but we do recognize that the enemy seeks to steal, kill, and destroy families, and we must pray for deliverance and truth to break through. At the same time, God calls us to honor our father and mother as Exodus 20:12 teaches, and part of that honor as an adult can mean loving her, praying fervently for her, forgiving her as Christ has forgiven us, and also establishing healthy, biblical boundaries so that you are not continually wounded. Ephesians 4:32 says And be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you. Forgiveness does not mean denying the hurt or pretending the behavior is normal, it means releasing her into God's hands for Him to judge and to heal.
We encourage you not to carry this burden alone. Jesus invites you in Matthew 11:28 Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. And 1 Peter 5:7 tells us to be casting all your worries on him, because he cares for you. We encourage you to continue to guard your own heart by not reacting in the flesh but responding by the Spirit. Proverbs 15:1 says A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. When you feel yourself becoming overwhelmed, it is wise and biblical to step away quietly, to pray, to breathe, and to seek the Lord's peace before continuing the conversation. We also encourage you to seek ongoing godly counsel, whether a wise pastor or a biblically grounded Christian counselor, who can walk with you over time and help you process the long term effects this has had on you and help you learn how to set loving limits while still honoring your mother. The Lord wants to restore what has been broken in you.
We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus, and we want to lovingly remind you that it is only through Him that we have access to the Father and find true healing and salvation. John 14:6 says Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. And Acts 4:12 says There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved. If you have not already, we encourage you to confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, for Romans 10:9 says that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. It is in His name that we can boldly bring your mother and your own heart before God and expect Him to move.
We join together in prayer for you now.
Father in heaven, in the name of Jesus Christ we come before You and we lift up this dear one who is weary and hurting. Lord, You see every tear and You know the weight of carrying this burden for a lifetime. We ask You to wrap Your comfort around this heart right now, to give rest to the weary soul and to heal the deep emotional wounds that have accumulated over many years. Lord, we also lift up this mother to You. You know what is spiritually wrong and what is oppressing her. We rebuke the spiritual forces of darkness that have influenced her mind and behavior, and we ask in Jesus name for deliverance, for clarity, for conviction and for healing in her. Bring light into darkness, Lord, and let Your truth set her free. Help this child to walk in forgiveness while also walking in wisdom, to honor You and to honor their mother without being destroyed by the dysfunction. Give discernment to know when to speak and when to quietly step away, and give strength to not react in anger or despair but to bear the fruit of Your Spirit in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, and self control. Provide godly support, wise counsel, and a community that will come alongside and encourage. We ask that You restore what the enemy has stolen and that You use this pain for Your glory and for good as only You can, for Romans 8:28 says We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose. We pray all of this in the mighty and saving name of Jesus Christ, our only hope and our healer, amen.
We were sorry to read what happened with your mother. Wanting comfort when you were crying and instead feeling her become more unhinged is so disorienting and painful, especially when you say this has been a pattern your whole life. It makes complete sense that you feel worn down and that you have carried your own hurt from it. Trying not to react in the moment takes real strength, and we understand why it feels so hard.
One insight that helps many people in long, strained family dynamics is thinking about boundaries as a property line. It is not about punishment or rejection, but about learning what is yours to carry and what is not, and giving yourself permission to guard your heart while staying connected in a healthy way. When we can tell the difference between ourselves and others, we are more free to let our yes be yes and our no be no, even in small moments.
A next step that might help is to decide ahead of time on one simple, calm boundary for the next time emotions rise together. For example, you might plan to kindly pause the conversation and step away for a little while if it becomes overwhelming, and have one safe person you can turn to afterward, like a trusted pastor, counselor, or mature friend. Because you mentioned this has affected your own mental and emotional health over many years, we would gently encourage you to talk one on one with a Christian counselor or pastor for ongoing support, alongside prayer.
Father, we lift this dear one to You right now. You see the tears and the long weariness and the desire to honor You while navigating this relationship. Give wisdom, protection, and steady peace, and surround them with safe, caring support. Lead them step by step and remind them they are held by You. In Jesus' name, amen.
One insight that helps many people in long, strained family dynamics is thinking about boundaries as a property line. It is not about punishment or rejection, but about learning what is yours to carry and what is not, and giving yourself permission to guard your heart while staying connected in a healthy way. When we can tell the difference between ourselves and others, we are more free to let our yes be yes and our no be no, even in small moments.
A next step that might help is to decide ahead of time on one simple, calm boundary for the next time emotions rise together. For example, you might plan to kindly pause the conversation and step away for a little while if it becomes overwhelming, and have one safe person you can turn to afterward, like a trusted pastor, counselor, or mature friend. Because you mentioned this has affected your own mental and emotional health over many years, we would gently encourage you to talk one on one with a Christian counselor or pastor for ongoing support, alongside prayer.
Father, we lift this dear one to You right now. You see the tears and the long weariness and the desire to honor You while navigating this relationship. Give wisdom, protection, and steady peace, and surround them with safe, caring support. Lead them step by step and remind them they are held by You. In Jesus' name, amen.
Azoirpaertown
Humble Prayer Partner
I prayed for this request in Jesus Name.
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