We understand your heart’s cry for clarity, and we commend your desire to deepen your relationship with God. However, we must address this situation with the truth and love of Scripture, for God’s Word is the lamp to our feet and the light to our path. The question you are asking is one that requires careful examination in light of God’s design for marriage, holiness, and His will for your life.
First, let us be clear: God’s Word leaves no room for ambiguity when it comes to marriage. In Matthew 19:4-6, Jesus says, *"Haven’t you read that he who made them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and shall join to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh’? So that they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, don’t let man tear apart."* Marriage is a sacred covenant before God, and He hates divorce (Malachi 2:16). The man you are speaking to is bound in a covenant with his wife, and for you to entertain the idea of him leaving her to be with you is to walk directly into sin—both adultery and the breaking of a vow made before God.
The emotions you are feeling are real, and the longing for companionship is understandable, but we must submit our desires to the Lordship of Christ. Proverbs 3:5-6 tells us, *"Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."* Right now, your path is being clouded by emotions tied to a past relationship that is not honoring to God. This man is not yours to claim—he belongs to another woman, and to pursue him in any way, even emotionally, is to walk in disobedience.
You mentioned that you love God and seek a better relationship with Him. That is wonderful, but love for God is proven by obedience to His commands (1 John 5:3). If you truly love Him, you must turn away from this situation entirely. This means cutting off all communication with your ex, not just for your own spiritual well-being but also for his and his wife’s. You are playing with fire by keeping this man in your life, and it will only bring pain, confusion, and sin. First Corinthians 15:33 warns, *"Don’t be deceived! ‘Evil companionships corrupt good morals.’"* Even if your conversations seem harmless, they are not. They are feeding a hope that is not from God and keeping you from the future He *does* have for you.
Now, let’s address your question about whether God could ordain for this man to divorce his wife and be with you. The answer is no. God does not lead His children into sin. He does not call us to break covenants or to build relationships on the ruins of another’s marriage. James 1:13-14 says, *"Let no man say when he is tempted, ‘I am tempted by God,’ for God can’t be tempted by evil, and he himself tempts no one. But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own lust and enticed."* The desire to be with this man is not from God—it is a temptation that must be resisted. If you continue down this path, you will find only heartache, guilt, and separation from the peace of God.
Instead, we urge you to surrender this relationship to the Lord completely. Ask Him to take away these feelings and to renew your mind with His truth. Romans 12:2 says, *"Don’t be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what is the good, well-pleasing, and perfect will of God."* Your focus should be on seeking God’s kingdom first (Matthew 6:33), trusting that He will provide all you need, including a godly spouse *in His timing and in His way*.
If you are meant to be a wife, it will not be through a relationship built on sin and broken vows. It will be through a relationship that honors God, one where both you and your future husband are fully surrendered to Christ and walking in obedience. Pray for a godly man who is free to pursue you in purity, not one who is bound to another. Proverbs 18:22 says, *"Whoever finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor of Yahweh."* But this favor comes when we walk in His ways, not when we try to force our own.
Lastly, you mentioned wanting an answer from God, whether through a message or a dream. While God can speak in many ways, He has already spoken clearly through His Word. He has given you His answer: *"Flee sexual immorality! ‘Every sin that a man does is outside the body,’ but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body"* (1 Corinthians 6:18). Adultery is sexual immorality, and even entertaining the thought of it is dangerous. Instead of seeking signs, seek the Lord Himself. Draw near to Him, and He will draw near to you (James 4:8). Spend time in His Word, in prayer, and in fellowship with believers who can encourage you in righteousness.
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Let us pray for you:
Heavenly Father, we lift our sister before You now, asking for Your mercy and grace to flood her heart. Lord, she longs for clarity, but more than that, she needs Your truth to set her free. Father, we rebuke every lie of the enemy that has taken root in her mind, every whisper that says this man is hers or that You would approve of a relationship built on broken vows. Your Word is clear: marriage is sacred, and You hate divorce. Lord, give her the strength to cut off all communication with this man completely. Sever every emotional tie that binds her to him, and fill the void with Your love and peace.
Father, we ask that You renew her mind and guard her heart. Help her to see this situation through Your eyes—to recognize the sin for what it is and to turn away from it. Replace her longing for this man with a longing for You. Let her find her satisfaction in Christ alone, knowing that He is enough. If it is Your will for her to be married, Lord, bring a godly man into her life—a man who is free, who loves You, and who will lead her closer to You. But until then, teach her to be content in You, to trust in Your timing, and to walk in purity.
We pray for her ex-husband and his wife as well, Lord. Soften their hearts toward You and toward each other. Restore their marriage if it is Your will, and break every chain of sin that has bound them. Let Your redemption cover their home.
Finally, Father, we ask that You surround our sister with godly counsel—believers who will speak truth into her life and hold her accountable. Give her the courage to obey You, even when it’s hard. Let her find her identity in Christ and her purpose in Your kingdom. We declare that she is Your daughter, bought with a price, and called to holiness. May she walk in the freedom and victory that Jesus purchased for her on the cross.
In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray. Amen.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
