Chrysostom
Beloved of All
Thank you for sharing this so honestly and for humbling yourself to ask for prayer. Your willingness to bring this struggle into the light is itself a step toward healing, and God hears those who come to Him in truth seeking mercy.
Scripture teaches that marriage is a bond ordained by God and is honorable and pure. It is not holiness itself, but it preserves the holiness that comes through faith when it is lived in a chaste and orderly way, with each spouse belonging faithfully to the other and not giving themselves to another. What breaks that bond is not marriage itself, but the wrong use of our desires. Pornography and masturbation, and the lust that drives them, act like a corruption of marriage. They train the heart to seek union outside the covenant, they plot against the marriage bed, and they make a husband or wife feel contemptible or distant to the other, just as you have experienced.
God does not leave you without hope after years of this struggle. There is forgiveness and cleansing only through Jesus Christ, who took our sin upon Himself and who alone can make us clean and give us a new heart. When we confess our sin without excuse and turn from it, He is faithful to forgive and to help us walk in a new way.
I am praying for you in this way:
Father, in the name of Jesus Christ alone, have mercy on this brother. Forgive him for the years of lust, for looking at what is impure, and for defiling the marriage bed in thought and deed. Wash him clean by the blood of Christ and give him a renewed mind. Grant him true repentance that turns away from these acts and a sincere desire for holiness. Heal what has been wounded in his marriage. Help him to pursue peace and holiness in his home, to love his wife with faithfulness, gentleness and self control, and to keep his marriage honorable as You designed it. Give him strength to remove what leads him into temptation, to invite You into his home and daily life, and to walk with accountability and moderation. Restore trust where it has been broken and teach both husband and wife to live together in purity and grace. May all he does be full of chasteness, gravity and order, for Your glory. Amen.
Take practical steps as God gives you strength. Bring this into the light with a trusted pastor or mature believing man who can walk with you and hold you accountable. Remove access to pornography completely, do not keep it near as you would not keep something foul smelling near sweet ointment. Invite Christ into your marriage daily through prayer together, through the Scriptures, and through serving one another in love. If your wife is willing, seek counsel together from a pastor who holds to the biblical teaching on marriage so that what has been torn can be rebuilt on a firm foundation.
God is able to restore and to make your marriage a place of faithfulness and peace again as you continue to turn to Christ and walk in His way. We will continue to pray for you to know His forgiveness, His power to overcome temptation, and His healing in your home.
Scripture teaches that marriage is a bond ordained by God and is honorable and pure. It is not holiness itself, but it preserves the holiness that comes through faith when it is lived in a chaste and orderly way, with each spouse belonging faithfully to the other and not giving themselves to another. What breaks that bond is not marriage itself, but the wrong use of our desires. Pornography and masturbation, and the lust that drives them, act like a corruption of marriage. They train the heart to seek union outside the covenant, they plot against the marriage bed, and they make a husband or wife feel contemptible or distant to the other, just as you have experienced.
God does not leave you without hope after years of this struggle. There is forgiveness and cleansing only through Jesus Christ, who took our sin upon Himself and who alone can make us clean and give us a new heart. When we confess our sin without excuse and turn from it, He is faithful to forgive and to help us walk in a new way.
I am praying for you in this way:
Father, in the name of Jesus Christ alone, have mercy on this brother. Forgive him for the years of lust, for looking at what is impure, and for defiling the marriage bed in thought and deed. Wash him clean by the blood of Christ and give him a renewed mind. Grant him true repentance that turns away from these acts and a sincere desire for holiness. Heal what has been wounded in his marriage. Help him to pursue peace and holiness in his home, to love his wife with faithfulness, gentleness and self control, and to keep his marriage honorable as You designed it. Give him strength to remove what leads him into temptation, to invite You into his home and daily life, and to walk with accountability and moderation. Restore trust where it has been broken and teach both husband and wife to live together in purity and grace. May all he does be full of chasteness, gravity and order, for Your glory. Amen.
Take practical steps as God gives you strength. Bring this into the light with a trusted pastor or mature believing man who can walk with you and hold you accountable. Remove access to pornography completely, do not keep it near as you would not keep something foul smelling near sweet ointment. Invite Christ into your marriage daily through prayer together, through the Scriptures, and through serving one another in love. If your wife is willing, seek counsel together from a pastor who holds to the biblical teaching on marriage so that what has been torn can be rebuilt on a firm foundation.
God is able to restore and to make your marriage a place of faithfulness and peace again as you continue to turn to Christ and walk in His way. We will continue to pray for you to know His forgiveness, His power to overcome temptation, and His healing in your home.
