We hear the depth of your pain, and our hearts ache with yours. The injustice you’ve endured is heavy, and the silence you feel from God must be overwhelming. But we want you to know this: God *has not* abandoned you. Even when His answers aren’t what we expect—or when the world seems to stack the deck against us—He is still sovereign, still just, and still working. The psalmist cried out, *"Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?"* (Psalm 10:1), yet he also declared, *"The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble"* (Psalm 9:9). Your suffering is seen, and your Father in heaven collects every one of your tears (Psalm 56:8).
First, we must address the hatred in your heart. Scripture is clear: *"Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him"* (1 John 3:15). This isn’t to condemn you but to warn you—bitterness will only poison *you*, not your ex. Jesus commands us to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us (Matthew 5:44). That doesn’t mean what she’s done is excusable, but it does mean you must surrender your desire for vengeance to God. He says, *"Vengeance is mine; I will repay"* (Romans 12:19). Release her to Him, and ask God to soften your heart—not for her sake, but for yours.
Now, about your children: We grieve with you. The pain of being separated from them is a wound only God can fully heal. But hear this: *"Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you"* (Isaiah 49:15). God has not forgotten you *or* your children. He is their Father too, and He can work in their hearts even when you can’t be there. Pray for them daily—ask God to protect their faith, their minds, and their memories of you. And when despair whispers that you’ll never see them again, cling to this: *"All things are possible with God"* (Mark 10:27). Even the restoration of a broken family.
You asked what you’re supposed to learn. We don’t have all the answers, but we know this: God uses suffering to refine us. *"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness"* (James 1:2-3). This trial is forging in you a perseverance that will one day be used for His glory. And no, God does not want you to forget your children—He wants you to fight for them *His way*. That means pursuing justice through lawful means, yes, but also trusting Him with the outcome. *"Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act"* (Psalm 37:5).
We also must address something missing in your plea: the name of Jesus. There is no access to God except through Him (John 14:6), and no salvation apart from Him (Acts 4:12). If you’ve never surrendered your life to Christ, now is the time. Repent of your sins—including the hatred in your heart—and ask Jesus to be your Lord. Only then can you truly say, *"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want"* (Psalm 23:1), even in the valley of the shadow of death.
Let us pray for you now:
*"Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts for our brother. Lord, You see his pain, his anger, and his despair. You know the injustice he’s faced, and You collect every tear he’s shed. We ask You to draw near to him in this dark hour. Comfort him with Your presence, and remind him that You are his stronghold. Father, break the chains of bitterness in his heart. Help him to forgive, not because his ex deserves it, but because he needs the freedom that comes from obeying You. Lord, we lift up his children to You. Protect them, guard their hearts, and let them feel Your love even in their father’s absence. Restore what has been broken, and let them know their dad’s love for them. Give him wisdom as he navigates this legal battle, and let Your justice prevail. Most of all, Father, we pray that he would surrender his life fully to Jesus. Let him find hope not in circumstances, but in Christ alone. In Jesus’ mighty name, we pray. Amen."*
You are not alone in this fight. Keep pressing into God’s Word, even when it feels like He’s silent. *"Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen"* (Hebrews 11:1). Hold onto hope, and keep fighting—not just for your children, but for your own soul. The enemy wants you to give up, but God is calling you to stand firm. *"Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong"* (1 Corinthians 16:13). We’re standing with you.
