Losing...

[LostDad]

The last words I heard from my oldest son.....### when you do better I will come back. Kinda hard when it's been over a year since he talked to me to tell what I need to change? I go to therapy, I work 3 jobs, I pay all the bills for them. Yesterday I saw a picture of my daughter dancing with her dad. I can't even begin to tell how much that hurt. She doesn't need me, they have a new dad in their lives. I just feel so much being erased. Even to the point I ask Jesus if he wants me to be a dad anymore? It's so incredibly hard when my kids stopped loving me and choosing not to see me. Please help. It hurts.

 

[Articles]

We hear the deep anguish in your heart, and we come alongside you in this pain, lifting it up to our Heavenly Father who sees every tear and collects them in His bottle (Psalm 56:8). The wound of a child turning away is one of the most profound sorrows a parent can endure, and your cry—*"Does Jesus even want me to be a dad anymore?"*—reveals a grief that only God can fully heal. But we want you to know this: **Your identity as a father is not defined by their choices, but by God’s calling over your life.** The Lord knit those children together in your care (Psalm 139:13-14), and He has not released you from that sacred responsibility, even when it feels unseen or unappreciated.

First, we must address the weight of your son’s words: *"When you do better, I will come back."* While his absence has left you desperate to understand what needs to change, we must gently rebuke the spirit of condemnation behind this statement. The enemy would love for you to believe you are failing as a father, but Scripture declares there is **no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus** (Romans 8:1). You are in therapy, working tirelessly to provide, and seeking the Lord—these are not the actions of a man who has given up. Yet we also recognize that children, especially those influenced by others, can sometimes weaponize words in ways that wound deeply. **Their rejection does not nullify your love or your role as their father.** Even if they do not see it now, your prayers and perseverance are planting seeds that will bear fruit in God’s timing (Galatians 6:9).

The pain of seeing your daughter dance with another man, calling him "dad," is a grief that cuts to the core. We grieve with you, for the Lord Himself understands the ache of a child turning to another (Jeremiah 2:13). But we must also speak truth: **Your children did not stop loving you because of something you did or did not do.** Love is a choice, and their decision to distance themselves may have more to do with loyalty conflicts, manipulation, or even deception from others than with your worth as their father. The enemy seeks to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10), and he would love nothing more than to convince you that you are replaceable. But you are **not replaceable** in God’s eyes—or in theirs, even if they cannot see it yet.

We must also address your question to Jesus: *"Do You want me to be a dad anymore?"* Beloved, **God does not call us to a role and then abandon us in it.** Fatherhood is a high calling, and even when it feels thankless or invisible, it matters eternally. The Lord sees your labor, your tears, and your heartache, and He promises that **your work in the Lord is not in vain** (1 Corinthians 15:58). But we must ask: Are you measuring your worth as a father by their response, or by God’s approval? The world may erase you, but the Lord says, *"I have inscribed you on the palms of My hands"* (Isaiah 49:16). **You are not forgotten.**

Now, let us pray for you:

*"Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this broken father who feels erased, rejected, and forgotten. Lord, You are the Father to the fatherless (Psalm 68:5), and You see the pain of a parent’s heart when their children turn away. We ask You to wrap Your arms around him in this moment, reminding him that his identity is secure in You—not in their approval or their presence. Father, we rebuke the spirit of rejection and condemnation that has whispered lies into his heart. We declare that he is **loved, chosen, and called** by You, and that his labor as a father is seen and valued by You.

Lord, we pray for his children. Soften their hearts, God. Remove any bitterness, deception, or loyalty conflicts that have turned them away. If there are wounds in their relationship that need healing, reveal them and bring restoration. Give this father the strength to keep praying, keep loving, and keep trusting You, even when it feels hopeless. Remind him that **You are working all things together for good** (Romans 8:28), even when he cannot see it.

Father, we ask for a supernatural encounter with Your love for him. Let him feel Your presence in a tangible way, reminding him that You have not abandoned him. Fill the empty places in his heart with Your peace, and give him the courage to keep fighting for his children—not in his own strength, but in Yours. We declare that **the enemy will not have the final word** over this family. In Jesus’ mighty name, we pray. Amen."*

Here is what we encourage you to hold onto:
1. **Your worth is not determined by their response.** You are a father because God called you to be one, and He does not make mistakes. Even if they do not acknowledge it now, your love and prayers are making an eternal impact.
2. **Do not stop fighting for them.** Keep reaching out—through letters, texts, or prayers—even if they do not respond. Your persistence is a testimony to your love, and it may be the very thing that breaks through their hardness of heart.
3. **Guard your heart against bitterness.** It is easy to grow resentful when you feel replaced or unappreciated, but bitterness will only poison you further. Instead, **choose forgiveness**—not because they deserve it, but because Christ forgave you (Ephesians 4:32).
4. **Cling to God as your Father.** When you feel like no one else wants you, remember that **God chose you** (Ephesians 1:4). He is your Abba, your Daddy, and He will never leave you or forsake you (Hebrews 13:5).
5. **Find your joy in Christ, not in their approval.** The enemy wants you to believe that your happiness depends on their love, but true joy comes from **abiding in Jesus** (John 15:5). He is enough.

Lastly, we want to gently address the mention of Jesus in your request. While you cried out to Him in your pain, we must emphasize that **Jesus is not just a name to call upon in distress—He is the only way to the Father** (John 14:6). If you have not already, we urge you to surrender your life fully to Him, confessing your sins and trusting in His sacrifice for your salvation. Only then can you experience the fullness of His love and peace. If you have already done this, then press in deeper—He is waiting to meet you in this pain.

You are not alone in this. We stand with you, and more importantly, **God stands with you.** Keep going. Keep praying. Keep loving. The story is not over.

 

[hostadmin]

Dear friend,

We're right here with you, feeling the weight of your heartache. It's like a physical pain, isn't it? The silence from your son, the image of your daughter dancing with another man - it's more than you can bear. We understand because we've been there too, in different ways. But we want you to know, you're not alone. We're lifting you up in prayer, just as you are.

First, let's address the elephant in the room. Your son's words, "When you do better, I will come back," they sting, don't they? But let's not forget, he's a child, still learning and growing. His words might not reflect the full truth of his feelings. And remember, your worth as a father isn't determined by his actions or words. You're doing all you can, seeking therapy, working multiple jobs, paying the bills. That's not the actions of a man who's given up. Keep going, keep fighting. Your love and persistence will make a difference, even if you can't see it yet.

Now, that picture of your daughter. It's a knife to the heart, we know. But remember, their choices don't diminish your love or your role as their father. Even if they don't see it now, your prayers and perseverance are planting seeds that will bear fruit in God's timing. Keep praying, keep loving. Don't stop fighting for them.

We also want to remind you, your identity as a father is not defined by their choices or actions. It's defined by God's calling over your life. He knit those children together in your care, and He hasn't released you from that responsibility. You're still their father, no matter what.

Lastly, we want to encourage you to find your joy in Christ, not in their approval. True joy comes from abiding in Jesus. He is enough. He sees your labor, your tears, your heartache. And He promises that your work in the Lord is not in vain.

So, let's pray together. Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this broken father who feels erased, rejected, and forgotten. Wrap Your arms around him, remind him that his identity is secure in You. Rebuke the spirit of rejection and condemnation that's whispered lies into his heart. Remind him that he is loved, chosen, and called by You. Fill the empty places in his heart with Your peace, and give him the courage to keep fighting for his children. In Jesus' mighty name, we pray. Amen.

Keep holding on, dear friend. The story is not over yet. You're not alone. We're here, and more importantly, God is here. Keep going, keep praying, keep loving.

 

[Wingsofadove7]

Seek His Face and Presence not just His hand. In his Presence is everything you need. This does not mean you can have any material thing , perfect spouse because you asked for it in Jesus Christ name. You will have your needs, some of your wants, and difficult trials. The difficult trials are supposed to refine your character and make you more like Jesus. He is more interested in getting you to everlasting life and having your heart in the right place than he is in giving you gifts. It’s eternal life he’s concerned with.

 

[usha rani]

Praying for this in Jesus Name. Amen.