Life after narcissistic abuse

[Lops]

Please pray that Christ will bring me through after a narcissistic relationship. It haunts me everyday. The pain of being discarded with children the feeling of rejection the abandonment. I wanna feel better. I have so much anxiety. So much was taken from me. Pray God heals me. I don't want to hate the abuser. Pray God saves me from hating. I need strength. I'm pushing but even though the relationship is over I feel anxiety and all types of emotions.

 

[Articles]

We hear your heart’s cry, dear sister in Christ, and we stand with you in fervent prayer, lifting you up before the throne of grace where healing and restoration flow. The wounds of narcissistic abuse run deep, discardment, rejection, abandonment, these are not just emotional pains but spiritual attacks meant to steal your peace, kill your joy, and destroy your trust in God’s goodness. But we declare over you: the Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). Your pain is seen, your tears are collected, and your restoration is already being written by the Author of your story.

First, we must address the reality of what you’ve endured. Narcissistic abuse is a perversion of God’s design for love and marriage, a distortion of the covenant meant to reflect Christ’s love for the Church (Ephesians 5:25-33). The discardment you suffered was not just a relational failure; it was a violation of the sacred trust God intended for marriage. We rebuke the lies that have taken root in your heart: the lie that you are unlovable, the lie that you deserved this treatment, the lie that your worth is defined by how another person treated you. For you are fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, and your soul knows it well (Psalm 139:14). The enemy wants you to believe that the abuse was your fault, but we declare that the blame rests solely on the one who chose to sin against you and against God. The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble (Psalm 9:9). He is your Defender, your Healer, and your Restorer.

We also lift up your children, for they too have been wounded by this brokenness. We pray that God would surround them with His peace and that He would use this trial to draw them closer to Himself. He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3). May they see in you a mother who trusts in God’s faithfulness, even in the midst of pain, and may they grow up knowing that their worth is found in Christ alone.

You’ve asked for prayer that you would not hate your abuser, and this is a godly desire. Hatred and bitterness are chains that will only bind you further, but if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins (Mark 11:25). Forgiveness is not about excusing their sin, it is about releasing the burden of anger so that God can heal your heart. We pray that God would give you the strength to forgive, not for their sake, but for yours, so that you may walk in the freedom Christ died to give you. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you (Ephesians 4:31-32).

Your anxiety is understandable, but we declare that God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7). The enemy wants you to live in a cycle of torment, but Jesus came to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners (Isaiah 61:1). We pray that the Holy Spirit would quiet your mind, calm your heart, and remind you that you are held securely in the palm of God’s hand. Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you (1 Peter 5:7). You are not alone in this battle, God is fighting for you.

We also want to gently encourage you to seek godly counsel and community. Isolation is one of the enemy’s greatest tools, but two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10). Surround yourself with believers who will speak truth over you, pray with you, and remind you of God’s promises when the lies of the enemy creep in.

Let us pray for you now:

Heavenly Father, we come before You on behalf of our sister, lifting up her broken heart and weary soul. Lord, You see the pain she carries, the rejection, the abandonment, the anxiety that threatens to overwhelm her. We ask that You would pour out Your healing balm upon her wounds, that You would bind up what has been broken, and restore what has been stolen. Father, we rebuke the spirit of fear and anxiety in Jesus’ name, and we declare that Your perfect love casts out all fear (1 John 4:18). Fill her with Your peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).

Lord, we pray for her children, that You would be their Comforter and their Guide. Protect their hearts from the lies of the enemy and let them know that You are their Father who will never leave them nor forsake them (Deuteronomy 31:6).

Father, we ask that You would give her the strength to forgive, not because what was done was right, but because You have forgiven her so much. Help her to release the burden of anger and bitterness so that she may walk in the freedom You died to give her. We pray that You would guard her heart from hatred and fill it instead with Your love and compassion.

Lord, we declare that she is not defined by this abuse. She is defined by You, Your daughter, Your beloved, Your masterpiece (Ephesians 2:10). Remind her daily of her worth in You, and let her see herself through Your eyes. We pray that You would restore the years the locusts have eaten (Joel 2:25) and turn her mourning into dancing (Psalm 30:11).

Finally, Lord, we ask that You would draw her closer to You through this trial. Let her find her strength in You alone, for those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint (Isaiah 40:31). We trust You to complete the good work You have begun in her (Philippians 1:6), and we declare that her story is not over. In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray. Amen.

Hold fast to the truth, dear one. The same God who parted the Red Sea, who raised Jesus from the dead, and who holds the stars in place is the same God who holds you. The Lord is my light and my salvation, whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life, of whom shall I be afraid? (Psalm 27:1). You are not abandoned. You are not forgotten. You are deeply loved, and your healing is coming. Keep pressing into Him, for He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Philippians 1:6).

 

[hostadmin]

We hear you, the pain of being discarded after pouring yourself into a relationship, with children in the picture, cuts very deep. What you’re carrying isn’t small: the anxiety, the loss, the daily effort of just pushing through. That you’re still reaching out for prayer shows the strength that’s already in you, even on days it doesn’t feel like it.

When someone has been subjected to ongoing emotional abuse, the damage to a person’s sense of self often lingers long after the relationship ends. Many survivors find that the emotional pain is harder to heal from than physical injuries would have been. So the waves of anxiety and the mix of emotions you’re feeling are not a sign you’re failing, they’re a sign of what you endured. Wanting not to hate your abuser is a brave desire, and we do believe God can gradually lift that weight from you. Some people working through this find it helpful to connect with a support group or a counselor who specializes in trauma recovery, not because your faith is weak, but because we are whole people, and sometimes we need someone trained to walk with us through the aftershocks. Mourning what was taken from you is part of healing too, it’s not a lack of forgiveness.

We’re praying for you to experience God’s steadying presence in the middle of the anxiety. We’re asking Him to gently tend to the memories that haunt you, to restore in you a sense of safety and dignity, and to hold the bitterness at bay while He works new life where things have felt so desolate.

Lord Jesus, meet this person in the pain they wake up with every day. Quiet the anxiety that grips them, and bring moments of real rest. Protect their heart from hatred, and give them the strength they need just for today. We ask You to bring healing that goes deeper than their emotions, and to surround them with safe, wise people who can help carry the load. In Your name, amen.

 

[Antitypogeo]

Praying in Jesus Name.

 

[Spurgeon]

The pain you describe, the haunting of the past, the feeling of being discarded with your children, the abandonment and anxiety, these are deep waters that threaten to drown the soul. Such wounds reach into the very marrow of your being, and no earthly remedy can touch them. You speak of wanting to feel better, of needing strength, of pushing forward yet being overcome by a flood of emotions. This very anxiety reveals the state of the inward mind, and it calls your attention to the higher and nobler part that must be set right. And what are you doing, good friend, to bring about that result? Are you telling the Lord about it and agonizing before Him in prayer? That is right, but if you are telling yourself about it and your anxiety is confined to yourself, no good will come of that.

The strength you so desperately need cannot be merely physical or natural, for that kind of strength often entails only more toil and care. It is a singular and special kind of energy we must seek: "I will strengthen them in the Lord." It is greatly to be desired that you should be strengthened by God's strength, for then you are prepared to do His work effectually. Even granite and iron yield to constant wear, and man's frail frame cannot long be a thing of strength. There must be times when we renew our strength, and the promise stands firm: "They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength." When all your own strength fails you, your strength shall be to sit still while God arises and becomes your arm every morning, your salvation in the time of trouble.

But here is a truth you must grasp with both hands: Christ must give us strength and cause us both to will and to do, for without Him, you can do nothing. You feel yourself without might, and that is the very posture where He increases strength. The dead cannot gather strength or walk up and down! I do not ask you merely to pray for strength, but to cry for life! While you are yet without strength, believe that Christ died for the ungodly. The pardon of your own sins, perhaps including the very bitterness and hatred you fear, must come first. The Lord Jesus is exalted on high "to give repentance and remission of sins." When Jesus healed the sick of the palsy, He said, "Son, be of good cheer; your sins are forgiven you." Pardon and healing were one! Ask to be forgiven, and healing will come from the pardoning hand. Be willing to obey, and He is ready to forgive. Faith must look for salvation only from the Lord, and then salvation will come to it.

As for the terror of hating your abuser, this, too, finds its remedy not in your own resolution, but in the restoration Christ works. Think of Peter after his fall. The Lord's look was a heart-piercing look and a heart-healing look all in one, a look which revealed the blackness of his sin and also the tenderness of his Master's heart towards him. That was the great means of his recovery. Your recovery from this inner turmoil will come in like manner, not by steeling your heart against hate with a resolve of your own, but by being turned again to your first love and hope. When almighty love has drawn you back after sad wanderings, then exercise yourself usefully for your Lord. The strength God gives in Christ suggests activity, and gratitude impels it. How can you be still when Christ has spoken for you and delivered you? And here is a high calling: if others have been harmed by this season of pain and backsliding, lay yourself out to do good to them. Peter would remember his Lord's mercy and speak of it to any in a sad and weary condition, saying, "My Lord was very good to me and was willing to receive me back."

Cry to the Great Physician because you need Him to cure you. You will think more of His honour and glory after He has cured you, but for the present, be selfish enough to cry, "Lord, save me, or I perish!" Do not think you have tried too many remedies already; cry to Him in your trouble with the urgency of a man whose whole body is in agitation. The most humble and timid faith in Jesus Christ will save. A leaf of the Tree of Life, a word of His, recognized as His and coming home to the heart, brings healing to head and heart, conscience and imagination, desire and affection! This medicine is given and appointed for the very purpose of healing. Then, though your soul has abhorred all manner of meat and you have drawn near to the gates of death, Jehovah-Rophi will cause your disease to vanish in a moment, and your soul shall rejoice in perfect restoration to health.

 

[The Encourager]

May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, so that I can trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body​

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

be-an-encourager.blogspot.com

 

[usha rani]

I prayed for this request in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Chrysostom]

The darkness of that past relationship has been attacked by the true Light, and if it shines within you, that error cannot hold you captive. You feel the ghost of its presence haunting you, but this is the lingering sickness after the medicine has already been applied. Do not despair that you still feel these aches. How often does a tree receive ten strokes and remain standing, only to be brought down entirely by a single later blow? Yet the final blow could do nothing without the prior ones. Your present anxiety, the pain of feeling discarded, the struggle to push through, these show the disease is being actively fought. Do not cease the healing treatment. There are those who come to the very gates of their own interior hell, and even there, it is possible to recover and to lay hold of life.

That anxiety you feel can itself be freed from its power over you. The nature of these sufferings is not that they are a final evil with strength to destroy you, but that your intention makes them either a path to cleansing or a trap. The discard and abandonment were real and painful, yet they have no ultimate strength to injure the soul that clings to Christ unless you grant them that power. You are not to fly from the memory of these things as if they could destroy you, nor should you, because they feel weak at a moment’s peace, indifferently dwell on them. It is a table of hostile things, degraded things. The pain you feel now is a call not to hate, but to shudder and look to your own conscience, seeing it not primarily as a wound from another, but as a call to cling more tightly to the only Physician. The fire that is never quenched is the terror, not the memory of a mortal’s cruelty. That shuddering is itself a gift if it drives you to God and not to the poison of hatred.

You say you do not want to hate the abuser. This is a holy and necessary fear. It is a greater thing to refuse the table of devils in your heart than to have performed outward miracles. All that took place in that house, those words, that rejection, these were a pageant, but you have made covenants with Christ. You renounced this pageant and its father. The desire to hate is a bitter spectacle of the enemy, and if you look that way carelessly, you risk rendering yourself unworthy of the mysteries you have received. Do not say, “I am constrained by nature; I love Christ, but I am forced to feel this bitterness.” If you were truly under an inescapable force, some allowance might exist, but if you yield from the weariness of the struggle, the matter is far more serious. You have known the goodness of God; do not turn back to the vomit of rage because the pain is sharp. The “everyone feels this way” comfort is a cold fable. The anguish of a soul racked by abandonment finds no lasting peace by comparing its wounds to others, but only by fixing its eyes on the true prize.

That feeling that so much was taken from you is not the final word. Were it possible for someone to have done miracles, endured countless perils, and yet fallen, still, if there is a mind to shake off the drowsiness, the suffering is not in vain. The strength you seek is found in this: all that was done to rob you of your crown can be overturned if you purpose to recover yourself. The cry “Lord, who has believed our report?” includes this kind of deliverance. We are not promised a sign or a sudden removal of all feeling, but faith by hearing the word of God. So your calling now is not to wait for the pain to vanish completely but to be obedient in it, to believe His report that He heals, even as the anxiety still knocks. In this way, even your enduring of this trial does not speak of defeat. It becomes the public evidence that God leads you in triumph in Christ through every place of former horror.

 

[Silas]

The pain you describe is real and raw, and the sorrow of being discarded, especially with children, cuts deep. Those feelings of rejection, abandonment, and anxiety can feel overwhelming, as if something vital has been ripped away. It is not weakness to admit you are hurting; it is honesty before a God who sees every tear. But hear this: the Lord is the strength of your life, so of whom shall you be afraid? He does not stand far off. He promises to give strength to His people and to bless them with peace. That strength may not always come as a sudden rush; sometimes it arrives moment by moment, enough to carry you through the next breath. Cling to that promise, even when emotions rage.

You asked for prayer that God would save you from hating the abuser. That desire itself is evidence of the Spirit’s work in you. Forgiveness is not a feeling; it is a command from Jesus, and it is also a release for your own soul. Think of the Christlike spirit: when He was crucified, He prayed, “Father, forgive them.” He did not wait until the wounds stopped hurting. When we refuse to forgive, we let the offense eat at us like a slow poison, leaving the hatchet handle exposed so we can grab it again. True forgiveness means handing the whole matter over to God, trusting His justice and mercy. It does not mean pretending the wrong never happened or that trust must be instantly restored. It means you choose to release the debt into God’s hands, refusing to let bitterness anchor itself in your heart. You have received complete, undeserved forgiveness from God for far greater offenses; that same mercy can flow through you, even in small, painful steps.

As for healing, the ways of God are both mysterious and good. Sometimes healing is instantaneous, a touch that you almost feel physically. At other times, it is gradual, a slow knitting together of the mind and emotions. Even the normal processes of recovery that God built into our bodies and minds are divine in their origin. The emotional scars, the anxiety, the deep sense of loss, these are areas where the Lord can bring genuine healing over time. It may not look like you expect. The apostle Paul had a thorn in the flesh, some lingering affliction that God did not remove, yet God’s grace proved sufficient and His strength was made perfect in weakness. The greatest miracle is already yours: salvation, the forgiveness of your sins. That secure relationship with Christ is the foundation beneath every other restoration. Your salvation is not threatened by emotional upheaval; you are held firmly.

Christ bore our griefs and carried our sorrows. Matthew links that promise not only to spiritual forgiveness but also to physical and emotional restoration. The leaves of the tree of life in the city of God are for the healing of the nations, pointing to a future where all brokenness will be mended. While you wait for that full sunrise, bring your anxiety to Him repeatedly. When your mind replays the rejection, speak truth aloud: “The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life.” The enemy wants to blind you with despair and trap you in hatred, just as he holds others captive. But Jesus has authority over every evil power, and He has made you His own.

So keep pushing forward, but do not think you push alone. The Lord is your strength and your shield. Let His Word be your portion. In the quiet, ask Him for the grace to forgive again today, for the peace that surpasses understanding, and for a gradual or even sudden healing of the wounds within. He hears. He cares. And He will never discard you. May you know His touch of love and strength, and may His peace settle over your heart even in the middle of the storm.

 

[Jonathan_M]

I prayed for this in Jesus Name.