We hear your heart, dear sister, and we stand with you in seeking the Lord’s wisdom for this pivotal moment in your life. First, we want to acknowledge the love and commitment you have for this man, and we honor the desire to honor God in your relationship. But we must also speak truth in love, as Scripture commands us.
Your relationship is currently in a season of courtship, and the goal of courtship should always be marriage—holy, God-ordained marriage between one man and one woman, as Genesis 2:24 declares: *"Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall be one flesh."* If this relationship is not moving toward that sacred covenant, we must ask whether it is truly aligned with God’s design. Long-distance relationships can be challenging, but they should not be indefinite. If marriage is not the clear next step, then we must prayerfully consider whether this season is serving God’s purpose or merely delaying His best for you both.
You mentioned that you and your boyfriend have been together for several years, yet there is no clear path to engagement. This raises concerns, for Scripture warns us not to be unequally yoked (2 Corinthians 6:14) and to walk in wisdom, not in prolonged uncertainty. Proverbs 3:5-6 reminds us, *"Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."* If this man is not ready to pursue marriage with the same intentionality that you are, we must ask whether his timeline—or lack thereof—is honoring God’s call for your life.
We also want to gently address the nature of your relationship. If you and your boyfriend are physically intimate, we must rebuke that sin in Jesus’ name. Hebrews 13:4 states, *"Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the bed be undefiled; but God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers."* If you are not married, any sexual relationship is fornication, and it grieves the Holy Spirit. We urge you to repent and seek God’s forgiveness, for He is faithful to cleanse and restore (1 John 1:9). True love waits, and it honors God’s boundaries.
Now, let us pray for you both:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus, lifting up this sister and her boyfriend. Lord, You see their hearts, their love for one another, and their desire to honor You. We ask that You would grant them supernatural clarity this weekend, Father. Remove every veil of confusion, fear, or doubt, and let Your perfect will be made plain. If this relationship is not Your best for them, Lord, we ask that You would close the door gently but firmly. If it is Your will for them to move forward, we pray that You would align their hearts, their timelines, and their purposes under Your lordship.
Father, we rebuke any spirit of fear, indecision, or selfishness that may be hindering this relationship. We declare that Your plans for them are plans for peace and not for harm, to give them a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11). Lord, if there has been any sexual immorality in this relationship, we ask for Your forgiveness and healing. Cleanse their hearts and minds, and restore purity to their love. May they honor You in every way, both now and in the future.
We also pray for this sister’s heart, Lord. She fears disappointing You, but we know that You are a God of grace and mercy. Help her to trust in Your sovereignty, knowing that even in uncertainty, You are working all things together for her good (Romans 8:28). Give her the courage to walk in obedience, even if it means letting go of what she loves. And if this man is not her future husband, Lord, we ask that You would prepare her heart for the godly spouse You have for her—a man who will cherish her, lead her in righteousness, and pursue marriage with the same passion she has for You.
Father, we ask all these things in the precious name of Jesus, for there is no other name by which we can come to You. We thank You for Your faithfulness, Your wisdom, and Your love. May Your will be done in this situation, and may Your name be glorified. Amen.
Sister, we want to encourage you with this truth: God is not disappointed in you. He sees your heart, your love for Him, and your desire to walk in obedience. Even if this relationship does not move forward, He is not punishing you. He is a good Father who gives good gifts to His children (Matthew 7:11). If this man is not the one, trust that God has someone even better for you—a man who will love you as Christ loves the Church (Ephesians 5:25), who will pursue marriage with godly intentionality, and who will lead you both in a covenant that honors the Lord.
We also encourage you to seek wise counsel from mature believers in your life—pastors, mentors, or godly couples who can speak truth into this situation. Proverbs 11:14 says, *"Where there is no counsel, the people fall; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety."* Do not walk this path alone. Surround yourself with those who will point you to Jesus and hold you accountable to His Word.
Finally, remember that your worth is not found in a relationship or a man’s timeline. Your worth is found in Christ alone. You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), and God has a purpose for your life that is greater than any earthly relationship. Whether single or married, your ultimate calling is to love and serve the Lord with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength (Mark 12:30). Trust Him with your future, and He will direct your steps.
