Know Thyself

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MrsHameed

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I sent this to a friend today but for some reason, feel that the Lord would have me share it with everyone who would read it. In these last days-and that's where we are-we need to be paying really close attention to what's going on around us. The climate towards those who love God is to dangerous to stick our heads in the sand any longer. Everyone deals with reality differently as no two people are exactly the same even if the SPIRIT is one and in all. Now is the time to "clean out the inside of our own cup". My family and my financial situation is dire, needless to say, especially if you've already the previous things I've written and the prayer requests. I'm both ashamed of my own disbelief- and in understanding of it. As a very fallible human being, I was weak and it's STILL hard, even as I write THIS, to stop beating myself up since our situation- at least this particular aspect of it- is my fault and no one else's. But be that as it is, God is about redemption and forgiveness and for me to keep on beating myself up is to slap him in the face so as of this minute, that STOPS (even if I end up going right back to the muck- who of us doesn't!!). It's not the falling down that's as important as the getting back up!!

I am familiar with fasting but don't believe in it for myself. By that, I mean I don't feel called to fast, which I would do if I did. I'm about real stuff-growing and developing in my relationship with the Lord without all the laws and regulations restricting what I do, so long as it's about righteousness. Jesus is about LIFE-not "tradition". All things are lawful(though not all things are edifying). This is not to say that YOU should not fast because if it is what you're called to do, then by all means be obedient and do it!! Some would say my not doing it is just me wanting to be lazy or whatever but it's not that for me. I've sat and watched the church for over 30 years. That's my spiritual gift, I guess- to be a watcher-and a discerner. It's why I'm so hard on the organization that others call church. I have serious issues with it. I wish I could be more gentle about it but I can't be anyone other than who I am, you know? To ME, that would be a sin. God has his own relationship with his people. We're all raised a certain way and once we come to be of age, it's our responsibility to learn and put into practice what we are to keep of what we were taught-and what we are get rid of for spiritual growth. It's taken 3 decades for me to get HERE, to where I am. I'm sorry to preach- been doing it since I was a child and it's the only "language" I know that brings peace to my soul. Are you familiar with Jeremiah? In essense, this is me-including the doubting and disparing part: check this out (copy/pasted from Bible.com) VERSE 9 is the most important.

7O LORD, thou hast deceived me, and I was deceived; thou art stronger than I, and hast prevailed: I am in derision daily, every one mocketh me.

8For since I spake, I cried out, I cried violence and spoil; because the word of the LORD was made a reproach unto me, and a derision, daily.

9Then I said, I will not make mention of him, nor speak any more in his name. But his word was in mine heart as a burning fire shut up in my bones, and I was weary with forbearing, and I could not stay.

10For I heard the defaming of many, fear on every side. Report, say they, and we will report it. All my familiars watched for my halting, saying, Peradventure he will be enticed, and we shall prevail against him, and we shall take our revenge on him.

11But the LORD is with me as a mighty terrible one: therefore my persecutors shall stumble, and they shall not prevail: they shall be greatly ashamed; for they shall not prosper: their everlasting confusion shall never be forgotten.

12But, O LORD of hosts, that triest the righteous, and seest the reins and the heart, let me see thy vengeance on them: for unto thee have I opened my cause.

13Sing unto the LORD, praise ye the LORD: for he hath delivered the soul of the poor from the hand of evildoers.

14Cursed be the day wherein I was born: let not the day wherein my mother bare me be blessed.

15Cursed be the man who brought tidings to my father, saying, A man child is born unto thee; making him very glad.

16And let that man be as the cities which the LORD overthrew, and repented not: and let him hear the cry in the morning, and the shouting at noontide;

17Because he slew me not from the womb; or that my mother might have been my grave, and her womb to be always great with me.

18Wherefore came I forth out of the womb to see labour and sorrow, that my days should be consumed with shame?

*** the fire I feel within my own soul eats me up day and night. It's the way I'm supposed to be- and it's also what keeps me in check as a woman of faith and a woman of God. Though the OT always uses the masculin form (as Jeremiah was male, of course) it also applies to women with the same spirit, as Ecclesiastes says there is NOTHING new under the sun.

I enjoy talking to you- you're full of knowledge and wisdom and I bless the Lord for his introducing us this way <3 Take care of yourself and shalom be to you and your family!!
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Lord heal your Child bring her spirit to happy and love and bring them to all great happiness with no danger or sadness any longer IJN Amen
 
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