We come before the Lord with heavy hearts, for we hear in your words a soul in deep torment, crying out for deliverance yet also confessing actions and thoughts that grieve the Holy Spirit. The Lord knows your name, and He sees your anguish, but we must first address the grave dangers in what you have shared, for the path you are walking is not of Christ but of the enemy who seeks to destroy.
You have confessed to an act of violence—striking out in rage against another person with intent to harm or even kill. This is not the way of Jesus, who taught us to love our enemies, bless those who curse us, and pray for those who spitefully use us (Matthew 5:44). The desire for another’s harm, even in your pain, is a sin that must be repented of immediately. The Lord does not delight in the suffering of anyone, and neither should we. "Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord" (Romans 12:19). Your anger and desire for retaliation are not from God but from the flesh, and they open the door to the enemy’s influence in your life. You must renounce this violence and ask God to cleanse your heart, for "the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God" (James 1:20).
You also speak of cursing another person under the guise of "blessing" them, hoping for their abilities to be disabled and for them to leave your life. This is a dangerous and deceptive practice. The Bible warns us not to curse others, for "with the tongue we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who are made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth comes blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so" (James 3:9-10). If this person has wronged you, you must forgive them as Christ has forgiven you. Unforgiveness is a snare that will hinder your prayers and give the enemy a foothold in your life (Mark 11:25-26). You cannot ask God to remove someone from your life while harboring hatred in your heart. Instead, pray for their salvation, their repentance, and for God to break any ungodly ties between you. Ask the Lord to give you a heart of love and compassion, even for those who have hurt you.
Your words also reveal a deep spiritual battle. You speak of stolen progress, restored curses, and a sense that others are benefiting from your prayers and Bible reading. We understand that you feel under spiritual attack, but we must remind you that "greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world" (1 John 4:4). The blood of Jesus *does* protect you, but you must stand firm in your faith, resisting the devil so that he will flee from you (James 4:7). If you have confessed your sins, they are forgiven, and the enemy has no right to bring them up again. Do not give place to the lies that your progress has been stolen or that others are benefiting from your spiritual efforts at your expense. The Lord is not unjust to forget your labor of love (Hebrews 6:10). Your focus must be on Jesus, not on the enemy or on others. The battle is the Lord’s, and He will fight for you if you will trust in Him.
You mention the idea of fasting to break ungodly connections, and this is a biblical practice. Fasting humbles our hearts before God and sharpens our spiritual senses. We encourage you to fast and pray, not with the goal of manipulating outcomes or cursing others, but with the goal of drawing closer to Jesus and surrendering your pain, anger, and fears to Him. "Is not this the fast that I have chosen? To loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke?" (Isaiah 58:6). Let your fasting be unto the Lord, seeking His will and His healing in your life.
We also notice that you are deeply troubled by what you perceive as "Christian vexation"—a loss of motivation, focus, and a sense of being tried beyond your limits. Beloved, the Christian life is not one of ease, but of endurance. Jesus warned us that in this world we would have tribulation, but He also promised that He has overcome the world (John 16:33). The trials you face are not without purpose. The Lord is refining you, teaching you to rely on Him, and preparing you for greater things. Do not lose heart. "Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up" (Galatians 6:9). Your focus must not be on the vexation but on the One who walks with you through it.
Finally, we must address your salvation. You call upon the name of Jesus, and this is good, for there is no other name under heaven by which we can be saved (Acts 4:12). But salvation is not just about calling on His name—it is about surrendering your life to Him, turning away from sin, and walking in obedience to His Word. If you have not fully surrendered to Jesus, we urge you to do so now. Confess your sins, turn away from them, and invite Jesus to be the Lord of your life. "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (1 John 1:9). There is no sin too great for His blood to cover, no heart too broken for Him to heal.
Now, let us pray for you:
Heavenly Father, we come before You on behalf of our brother, who is crying out to You in his distress. Lord, we ask that You would forgive him for the violence in his heart and the actions he has taken against another. Cleanse him from all unrighteousness and deliver him from the spirit of anger, bitterness, and vengeance. Fill him with Your Holy Spirit, that he may walk in love, forgiveness, and peace. Break every ungodly soul tie and every curse that has been spoken or received. Lord, we ask that You would protect him from the schemes of the enemy and surround him with Your angels. Give him the strength to forgive those who have wronged him and the grace to release them into Your hands.
Father, we rebuke the spirit of vexation that has sought to steal his motivation, focus, and joy. Renew his mind, Lord, and restore to him the joy of Your salvation. Help him to fix his eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of his faith. Give him the endurance to run this race with patience, knowing that You are working all things together for his good.
We pray that You would expose any darkness in his life and fill him with Your light. If there are areas where he has given the enemy a foothold, Lord, reveal them to him and give him the strength to repent and turn away. Let him experience the fullness of Your love and the power of Your resurrection in his life.
Lord, we ask that You would guide him into a season of fasting and prayer, not for his own will, but for Yours. Draw him closer to You, Father, and let him hear Your voice clearly. Break every chain of bondage and set him free to worship You in spirit and in truth.
We declare that no weapon formed against him shall prosper, and every tongue that rises against him in judgment, You shall condemn. Let Your peace, which surpasses all understanding, guard his heart and mind in Christ Jesus.
In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray, Amen.
Beloved, we urge you to seek godly counsel—someone who can walk with you through this season, pray with you, and help you stand firm in the faith. You are not alone in this battle. The Lord is with you, and He has given you brothers and sisters in Christ to support you. Do not isolate yourself. Reach out to a pastor or a mature believer who can help you navigate these struggles.
We also encourage you to meditate on the following Scriptures:
- Psalm 34:17-19: "The righteous cry, and Yahweh hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles. Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but Yahweh delivers him out of them all."
- Ephesians 6:10-12: "Finally, be strong in the Lord, and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world’s rulers of the darkness of this age, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places."
- Philippians 4:6-7: "In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus."
Stand firm, brother. The Lord is your strength and your shield. He will not leave you nor forsake you. Turn to Him with all your heart, and He will heal you and set you free.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
