We hear your heart in this and we join with you before the Lord in Jesus' name, for you did well to bring all of this to Him. You asked if you are being greedy or selfish for wanting stability, a place of your own again, meaningful work, and to use your gifts. Wanting provision, shelter, and purposeful work is not greed. God knows our needs and He is not displeased when we ask Him for them.
Your anxiety and feeling that you are just surviving is something we understand, and scripture speaks directly to it. You said you cast your anxiety upon Him, and that is exactly what God invites you to do. 1 Peter 5:7 says casting all your worries on him, because he cares for you. Philippians 4:6-7 says In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus. Matthew 6:31-33 reminds us Therefore don’t be anxious, saying, ‘What will we eat?’, ‘What will we drink?’ or, ‘With what will we be clothed?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first God’s Kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
We want to gently correct the thought that you must only survive and that it is wrong to want more than that. God does not call us only to endure excruciating survival, He calls us to trust Him for daily provision while we also learn contentment in whatever situation we are in. Philippians 4:11-13 says Not that I speak because of lack, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content in it. I know how to be humbled, and I know also how to abound. In everything and in all things I have learned the secret both to be filled and to be hungry, both to abound and to be in need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. And Hebrews 13:5 says Be free from the love of money, content with such things as you have, for he has said, I will in no way leave you, neither will I in any way forsake you. Contentment does not mean you cannot ask God for a better job or a future home again, it means trusting Him while you wait and working diligently where you are.
We also hear that you are living with your parents and feel restricted, like not being allowed to grow your hair out, and that they do not support your interest in puppets and voice acting, preferring you work at the zoo. While you are living under their roof, God calls us to honor our father and mother. Ephesians 6:1-3 says Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise, that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth. This can be hard when you are an adult longing for independence, but honoring them in small matters like appearance while you are dependent on them is part of showing respect and keeping peace in the home. At the same time, God has given you creative interests and it is not wrong to want to use them for good. Colossians 3:23 says Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men. Whether it is voice acting, puppet work, or keeping work at the zoo, we encourage you to offer your gifts to the Lord first and to be a faithful steward of the opportunities He does provide.
We understand the discouragement of losing your apartment and job, being pushed around at work, struggling with heat and difficult conditions, and now not finding full time work. It is easy to feel forgotten when seasonal work does not lead to a permanent position. But God sees your diligence. Proverbs 16:9 says A man’s heart plans his course, but Yahweh directs his steps. And Romans 8:28 says We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, for those who are called according to his purpose. Even a disappointing haircut today, which feels small but adds to the weight you carry, matters to God who cares about every detail of your life, though we remember 1 Samuel 16:7 that Yahweh doesn’t see as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but Yahweh looks at the heart.
Wanting to visit that apartment or have a place of your own again is not selfish, but we encourage you to bring that desire under God’s wisdom and stewardship. Ask Him if it is a wise use of the money He has entrusted to you, and seek His provision for stable housing and steady work in His timing. Keep pursuing training and applying for work with persistence, and also consider any honest work God opens to you while you train, so that you are providing as you are able.
We pray together with you now.
Father in heaven, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ and we lift up this dear one to You. Thank You that he has cast his anxiety upon You and that You care for him deeply. Lord, You know the loss of his apartment and job, the difficulty of living with his parents, the struggle to find full time work, and the heaviness of just trying to survive. We ask You to give him Your peace that surpasses all understanding to guard his heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Provide for his daily needs, open doors for steady and dignified work where he can labor heartily for You, and guide his steps regarding voice acting and all his creative gifts that they may be used for good and for Your glory. Teach him contentment while also giving him hope for the future, and help him to honor his parents while he is in their home. Remind him that he is not forsaken, that You will never leave him, and that You have a purpose for his life beyond mere survival. Lead him to trust You more each day and to seek first Your Kingdom. In Jesus' name we pray, Amen.
We encourage you to keep seeking the Lord daily in prayer and in His Word, to be faithful in small things, to continue to develop your skills while also being willing to work where God provides, and to trust that He hears you. He has answered by inviting you to come to Him through Jesus, and He will direct your path as you trust Him.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do. 
