We are deeply grieved to hear of the despair and suffering you are experiencing, and we want you to know that your life is precious in the sight of God. The pain you are feeling is real, but we must address the dangerous and unbiblical requests you have made. You have asked for Satan to take your life and even called upon Jesus to end it—this is not the will of God, nor is it the heart of Christ, who came that you "might have life, and have it abundantly" (John 10:10, WEB). The enemy seeks only to steal, kill, and destroy, but Jesus offers hope, healing, and eternal purpose.
First, we must rebuking the darkness in your words. Asking Satan to kill you is an invitation to evil, and it grieves the Holy Spirit. Scripture warns us, "Don’t give place to the devil" (Ephesians 4:27, WEB). Satan is a liar and a murderer from the beginning (John 8:44), and he desires nothing but your destruction. Do not give him any foothold in your life. Instead, resist him, firm in your faith (1 Peter 5:8-9). The fact that you are still alive is not a tragedy—it is evidence of God’s mercy, giving you another opportunity to turn to Him and find true peace.
We also must address the anger directed toward God in your words. You say you are "sick of suffering from [His] allowance of Satan affecting [your] life." But God is not the author of your suffering—He is the One who can redeem it. In this broken world, trials will come, but they are not without purpose. Jesus told us, "In the world you have oppression; but cheer up! I have overcome the world" (John 16:33, WEB). Your pain is not in vain, and God can use it to draw you closer to Him if you will let Him. He allows hardships not to harm you, but to refine you, to strengthen your faith, and to reveal His power in your weakness.
The frustrations you listed—noise, minor accidents, and inconveniences—may feel overwhelming in this moment, but they are temporary. The deeper issue is the despair that has taken root in your heart. This is not from God. The Bible says, "Why are you in despair, my soul? Why are you disturbed within me? Hope in God! For I shall still praise him for the saving help of his presence" (Psalm 42:5, WEB). Your focus has been on death, but God is calling you to *life*—to trust Him even when circumstances feel unbearable.
We urge you to repent of the bitterness and the invitation you have given to darkness. Turn to Jesus, who loves you more than you can imagine. He bore your sins, your pain, and even your despair on the cross so that you might have hope. He says, "Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart; and you will find rest for your souls" (Matthew 11:28-29, WEB). He is not distant or cruel—He is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18).
If you are struggling with thoughts of suicide, we implore you to reach out to a trusted believer, a pastor, or a counselor who can walk with you through this valley. You are not alone, and your life has infinite value to God. The apostle Paul faced immense suffering and even pleaded with God to remove his thorn in the flesh. But God’s response was, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" (2 Corinthians 12:9, WEB). God’s strength is made perfect in your weakness, and He can carry you when you feel you cannot go on.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we lift up this precious soul to You, knowing that You see their pain and hear their cries. Lord, we rebuking the spirit of despair and death that has taken hold, and we command it to flee in the mighty name of Jesus Christ. Father, forgive them for the words spoken in anger and frustration, and wash them clean by the blood of Your Son. Break the chains of hopelessness and fill them with Your peace that surpasses all understanding.
Lord, open their eyes to see Your love and Your purpose for their life. Remind them that You are close to the brokenhearted and that You collect every tear they shed (Psalm 56:8). Surround them with Your angels, protect them from the enemy’s schemes, and lead them to godly counsel and support. Heal their heart, renew their mind, and restore their joy in You.
We declare that their life is not their own—it was bought with a price (1 Corinthians 6:20). Satan has no claim over them, and we cancel every assignment of the enemy against their mind, body, and spirit. Fill them with Your Holy Spirit, Lord, and let them experience Your comfort and hope in a tangible way.
We ask for divine encounters—people who will speak life into them, scriptures that will anchor their soul, and a fresh revelation of Your goodness. Help them to cast all their cares upon You, for You care for them (1 Peter 5:7). Give them the strength to endure this season and the faith to believe that You are working all things together for their good (Romans 8:28).
In the name of Jesus Christ, we bind every spirit of suicide, depression, and self-hatred, and we loose the spirit of life, hope, and peace. Let them know, deep in their soul, that You have not abandoned them—that You are their Shepherd, and they shall not want (Psalm 23:1). Restore unto them the joy of Your salvation, and uphold them with Your righteous right hand.
We thank You, Father, for Your mercy and Your unfailing love. We trust that You are at work, even now, to bring beauty from these ashes. In Jesus’ mighty and holy name, we pray. Amen.
Beloved, we urge you to meditate on these truths:
- "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future" (Jeremiah 29:11, WEB).
- "The Lord is my shepherd: I shall lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He guides me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me. Your rod and your staff, they comfort me" (Psalm 23:1-4, WEB).
- "Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness" (Isaiah 41:10, WEB).
If you are feeling overwhelmed, reach out to someone—you are not meant to carry this burden alone. The body of Christ is here to support you, and God is faithful to complete the work He has begun in you (Philippians 1:6). Cling to Him, even if it feels like your grip is slipping. He will never let you go.