C
CoreyT
Guest
My name is Corey. I have a 4, 5, and 6 year old. 2 boys and a girl. Gage, Sadie and Aiden. Married a little over 2 years ago to their mother. I love them all, they are 'my' family. Her and I started seeing each other in 2003, not long after I had really strong feeling for her and I began to love her.
Throughout the course of our children's births and first years, I cheated, she cheated, we fought and argued, we made everything hard for us and against us......
I was lost, I got as bad as abusing her and the kids. I couldn't decide on God, on Life, on Love, on anything. Had a rope on my neck before I knew I just couldn't do it. And to cope with the pain I went to God because I've burnt every other bridge on my own. Including my wife and kids. Out of desperation I just listened to the words...... 'youtubed' "the proof of God" for weeks....finally came to the decision that there is in fact, a God, the same God that I believed in when I was a kid...... because when I was a child, I just knew. And I WAS loved, no question.
Now in this time I was getting ready to open the door to all of God's knocking, my wife continually cheated on me and just went down health wise and mentally, she was getting over burdened. A giant rift, grew between us. I had just recently abused her, so it's only human (unfortunately) to remain upset and hard to forgive since then. Truly, that was inside both of us, not just her.
Anyways, after a messy move/separation, I kept steadfast as much as possible in my new shoes of Faith. Read the Bible, and prayed....... Trying to clear my head long enough to stop begging and try to build a real relationship and trust with my God, my Father, our CREATOR! I struggled. She had the children, living with another family of 6........ 7 kids and 3 adults total.... in a 2 bedroom trailer....rough.
She ended up getting evicted, I got kicked out of my grandma's due to a 'conflict of interest' in the matter of helping her and my children from living on the street. I was left with the choice of moving out to help my kids, or stay there and let the kids go to DHS. I made my choice.
As of today, we are in a hotel.... almost $300 a week from my $8/hr job. My mom has kept us afloat. We are still separated per her choice. I am trying to stay with God and trust him here. It's really hard. I miss my wife, I know now WE NEED God in our marriage for us to stand. Even though I struggle in my mind alot about all conflicting questions, I still pray.
I pray that God will move our hearts closer to him. That we can 180 our lives and walk down this road with new eyes and new hearts. I've been on this site for 5 years (this is my newest screenname) and after that time, This is the request I have but my heart into. Sitting on this hotel bed with the screams and laughter from 3 hyper children in the background. I pray for their lives as I pray for my wives and my own. Only God can heal what is damaged to this family.
In God I'll trust.
Only through the authority of Jesus Christ,
Amen.
Throughout the course of our children's births and first years, I cheated, she cheated, we fought and argued, we made everything hard for us and against us......
I was lost, I got as bad as abusing her and the kids. I couldn't decide on God, on Life, on Love, on anything. Had a rope on my neck before I knew I just couldn't do it. And to cope with the pain I went to God because I've burnt every other bridge on my own. Including my wife and kids. Out of desperation I just listened to the words...... 'youtubed' "the proof of God" for weeks....finally came to the decision that there is in fact, a God, the same God that I believed in when I was a kid...... because when I was a child, I just knew. And I WAS loved, no question.
Now in this time I was getting ready to open the door to all of God's knocking, my wife continually cheated on me and just went down health wise and mentally, she was getting over burdened. A giant rift, grew between us. I had just recently abused her, so it's only human (unfortunately) to remain upset and hard to forgive since then. Truly, that was inside both of us, not just her.
Anyways, after a messy move/separation, I kept steadfast as much as possible in my new shoes of Faith. Read the Bible, and prayed....... Trying to clear my head long enough to stop begging and try to build a real relationship and trust with my God, my Father, our CREATOR! I struggled. She had the children, living with another family of 6........ 7 kids and 3 adults total.... in a 2 bedroom trailer....rough.
She ended up getting evicted, I got kicked out of my grandma's due to a 'conflict of interest' in the matter of helping her and my children from living on the street. I was left with the choice of moving out to help my kids, or stay there and let the kids go to DHS. I made my choice.
As of today, we are in a hotel.... almost $300 a week from my $8/hr job. My mom has kept us afloat. We are still separated per her choice. I am trying to stay with God and trust him here. It's really hard. I miss my wife, I know now WE NEED God in our marriage for us to stand. Even though I struggle in my mind alot about all conflicting questions, I still pray.
I pray that God will move our hearts closer to him. That we can 180 our lives and walk down this road with new eyes and new hearts. I've been on this site for 5 years (this is my newest screenname) and after that time, This is the request I have but my heart into. Sitting on this hotel bed with the screams and laughter from 3 hyper children in the background. I pray for their lives as I pray for my wives and my own. Only God can heal what is damaged to this family.
In God I'll trust.
Only through the authority of Jesus Christ,
Amen.
