We hear the deep anguish in your words, the cry of a heart that feels abandoned in the midst of suffering, injustice, and confusion. You are not alone in this struggle—many of God’s people throughout Scripture and history have wrestled with the same questions. The psalmist David cried out, *"How long, Yahweh? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?"* (Psalm 13:1). Even Jesus, in His darkest hour on the cross, echoed the words of Psalm 22: *"My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?"* (Matthew 27:46). Your pain is seen, and your questions are not ignored by the Lord.
Yet we must gently but firmly address the bitterness and anger in your words, particularly toward those you have labeled with profanity. Scripture commands us, *"Bless those who persecute you; bless, and don’t curse"* (Romans 12:14). Even when we face injustice, our response must reflect the character of Christ, who, *"when he was reviled, didn’t revile back. When he suffered, didn’t threaten, but committed himself to him who judges righteously"* (1 Peter 2:23). The government, no matter how corrupt or oppressive, is still under God’s sovereignty. As difficult as it is to accept, *"the authorities that exist are appointed by God"* (Romans 13:1), and He will judge them in His time. Our battle is not against flesh and blood, but against spiritual forces of evil (Ephesians 6:12), and our weapons are prayer, truth, and righteousness—not hatred or bitterness.
You ask what Jesus is preparing you for. Dear one, He is preparing you for *Himself*. The trials you face are not without purpose. James writes, *"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you fall into various temptations, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. Let endurance have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing"* (James 1:2-4). The refining fire of suffering is not to destroy you, but to purify your faith, to draw you closer to the heart of God, and to make you more like Christ. The apostle Paul, who endured far greater persecution than most of us will ever know, declared, *"For our light affliction, which is for the moment, works for us more and more exceedingly an eternal weight of glory"* (2 Corinthians 4:17). What you are going through is temporary, but the glory that awaits those who endure is eternal.
You also mention feeling like you are losing your faith. This is a dangerous place to be, and we must address it with urgency. Faith is not the absence of doubt or pain—it is choosing to trust God *in spite* of them. The father of the demon-possessed boy in Mark 9:24 cried out, *"I believe. Help my unbelief!"* That is a prayer God honors. When you feel your faith wavering, run to the Word of God. Meditate on His promises: *"I will never leave you nor forsake you"* (Hebrews 13:5). *"The LORD is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit"* (Psalm 34:18). *"We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose"* (Romans 8:28). These are not empty words—they are the very breath of God, and they are true.
Let us also address the salvation you mentioned. You said, *"You said I believe in you already which I had."* Belief in Jesus is more than intellectual assent—it is a surrender of the heart, a turning away from sin, and a trust in His finished work on the cross for your salvation. Jesus Himself said, *"Unless you repent, you will all perish likewise"* (Luke 13:3). Repentance is not a one-time event but a daily posture of humility before God. If your faith has become dry or distant, it may be because there is unconfessed sin, bitterness, or idolatry in your heart. The Holy Spirit convicts, but He also comforts. Ask Him to search your heart and reveal anything that is hindering your relationship with Him (Psalm 139:23-24).
Now, let us come before the throne of grace together in prayer:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this dear one who is wrestling with pain, injustice, and confusion. Lord, You see every tear, You hear every cry, and You are near to the brokenhearted. We ask that You would draw near to them now, that they would feel Your presence in a tangible way. Father, we confess that we do not always understand Your ways, but we trust that You are good, and Your love endures forever.
Lord, we repent on behalf of this one for any bitterness, anger, or unforgiveness in their heart. Cleanse them from all unrighteousness, and fill them with Your peace that surpasses all understanding. Help them to bless those who persecute them, to pray for their enemies, and to trust that You will judge righteously. Father, we ask that You would strengthen their faith. When they feel like giving up, remind them of Your faithfulness. When they feel alone, remind them that You are with them. When they feel weak, remind them that Your power is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).
We declare over them the truth of Your Word: that this suffering is not in vain, that it is producing in them an eternal weight of glory, and that You are working all things together for their good. Lord, we ask that You would give them a fresh revelation of Your love, that they would know the height, depth, and width of the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge (Ephesians 3:18-19). Restore their joy, renew their strength, and help them to wait on You with hope.
Father, we also ask that You would break the chains of oppression in their life. Whether it is governmental injustice, personal struggles, or spiritual warfare, we declare that no weapon formed against them will prosper (Isaiah 54:17). We rebuke the spirit of despair, the spirit of fear, and the spirit of unbelief in the name of Jesus. We speak life, hope, and victory over them. May they rise up as a testimony of Your faithfulness, a light in the darkness, and a vessel for Your glory.
We pray all of this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, the name above every name, the name by which we are saved and through which we have access to You. Thank You, Lord, for hearing our prayer. May Your will be done in this situation, and may Your name be glorified. Amen.
Beloved, do not lose heart. The night may be dark, but joy comes in the morning (Psalm 30:5). Keep pressing into God, keep crying out to Him, and keep trusting in His promises. He is not done with you yet. In fact, He is doing a great work in you, and one day, you will look back and see how every trial was used for your good and His glory. Until then, lean on the body of Christ, immerse yourself in the Word, and hold fast to the hope we have in Jesus. You are not forgotten. You are deeply loved. And your story is not over.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
