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Ilona
Guest
I ask for God's mercy and help constantly and I never receive an answer. I am four months pregnant with my second child. I met the child's father 9 years ago. We were supposed to be married June 28th and we didn't get married. When I revealed the pregnancy to him he left. I have heavily considered abortion but not only am I unable to afford it; I'm also worried about the physical and spiritual consequences of such an act. My first child is from a previous marriage and neither I, or my son, have any contact with my ex-husband. He was extremely abusive. My 5 year old son has autism. On October 9th I discovered that he was being abused by a teacher at his school. I have removed him from school and been home-schooling him since that time.
I do not know what to do and I'm very afraid in regard to the future. I am considering giving up the baby I'm carrying, although to me, an abortion would've been better than that. I don't know why the child's father just up and ran off, but I pray everyday that he will come back to at least go through with the marriage, so that this child is not illegitimate. I pray that God forgives me for all of my errors and sins but I don't get any answers. I wonder how I am going to care for my son-who requires so much attention and care, and a newborn baby-at the same time, all alone. I don't want to go on public assistance. Please pray for me because I don't think God is listening. I'm not asking for a lottery win or a new home or anything for myself..I just don't think children do as well without a father and I worry about the lifelong impact of having two children without one. Although my 5 year old is doing much better, I wonder if I will ever be able to get him into a school where people are trustworthy and good. I feel as if I've let my son down so much already..I cannot really afford to fail him anymore by bringing another child into our home who will not only affect our already tight finances, but also the level of care I'm providing him with. I feel like I've failed him, and myself enough. I just don't know what I'm going to do and I'm asking that God forgives me and helps me through this. Please pray for us.
I do not know what to do and I'm very afraid in regard to the future. I am considering giving up the baby I'm carrying, although to me, an abortion would've been better than that. I don't know why the child's father just up and ran off, but I pray everyday that he will come back to at least go through with the marriage, so that this child is not illegitimate. I pray that God forgives me for all of my errors and sins but I don't get any answers. I wonder how I am going to care for my son-who requires so much attention and care, and a newborn baby-at the same time, all alone. I don't want to go on public assistance. Please pray for me because I don't think God is listening. I'm not asking for a lottery win or a new home or anything for myself..I just don't think children do as well without a father and I worry about the lifelong impact of having two children without one. Although my 5 year old is doing much better, I wonder if I will ever be able to get him into a school where people are trustworthy and good. I feel as if I've let my son down so much already..I cannot really afford to fail him anymore by bringing another child into our home who will not only affect our already tight finances, but also the level of care I'm providing him with. I feel like I've failed him, and myself enough. I just don't know what I'm going to do and I'm asking that God forgives me and helps me through this. Please pray for us.
