We understand the deep sorrow and fear you are experiencing, and we want to remind you that our Heavenly Father is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Your honesty before God is a sign of a humble heart, and He is faithful to those who seek Him. However, we must gently address a few things to bring clarity and truth to your situation, for it is the truth that sets us free.
First, let us remind you that a "leap of faith" is not the same as acting out of desperation or fear. True faith is not a reckless jump into the unknown but a confident trust in God’s character and promises, even when we cannot see the outcome. The Bible tells us in Hebrews 11:1, *"Now faith is assurance of things hoped for, proof of things not seen."* Faith is not the absence of action but the assurance that God is with us in our actions, guiding and providing as we seek His will. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, *"Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."* Did you seek His wisdom and direction before you acted, or did fear and pressure drive your decision? This is an important question to reflect on, for God does not call us to act out of panic but to trust Him even in the midst of trials.
You mentioned that you felt you had "no other choice" and that "anyone in your position would have done the same." But as believers, we are called to a higher standard—one that relies on God’s wisdom, not our own understanding or the world’s logic. In 1 Corinthians 10:13, we are assured, *"No temptation has taken you except what is common to man. God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but will with the temptation also make the way of escape, that you may be able to endure."* Even in the most severe circumstances, God provides a way. It may not be the way we expect or desire, but He is always working for our good and His glory.
We also notice the deep disappointment in your words: *"I will never take a leap of faith again."* This breaks our hearts, for it suggests that your trust in God has been shaken. But let us remind you that God’s ways are not our ways, and His timing is not our timing. What may feel like a "let down" could be God’s way of refining you, teaching you, or redirecting your path for something greater. In Isaiah 55:8-9, He declares, *"‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, and your ways are not my ways,’ says Yahweh. ‘For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.’"* Do not let this trial harden your heart against God. Instead, let it draw you closer to Him in dependence and surrender.
As for the financial aftermath, we know how overwhelming this can feel. But remember what Jesus said in Matthew 6:25-34: *"Therefore I tell you, don’t be anxious for your life: what you will eat, or what you will drink; nor yet for your body, what you will wear. Isn’t life more than food, and the body more than clothing? ... But seek first God’s Kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore don’t be anxious for tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Each day’s own evil is sufficient."* Your practical steps are good, but have you sought God’s kingdom *first* in this? Have you asked Him for wisdom in how to navigate this situation? James 1:5 promises, *"But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him."* He is not withholding help from you.
Lastly, we want to address your closing words: *"I thank you for this day and I ask in Jesus name for your forgiveness."* It is beautiful that you are seeking forgiveness, but we must ask: Do you truly believe that God has forgiven you? Or are you still carrying the weight of guilt and regret? In 1 John 1:9, we are told, *"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."* If you have repented, then you *are* forgiven. Do not let the enemy keep you in bondage to regret. Instead, receive God’s forgiveness and allow Him to restore your hope.
Now, let us pray together for you:
Heavenly Father, we lift up our brother/sister to You, knowing that You see the depths of their heart and the weight of their burden. Lord, we ask that You would forgive them as they have sought Your forgiveness, and help them to fully receive Your grace. Remove the spirit of fear and regret that has taken hold, and replace it with Your peace that surpasses all understanding. Father, You know the financial strain they are under, and we ask that You would provide in ways that only You can. Open doors that no man can shut, and give them wisdom to navigate this season with faith and not fear. Lord, we rebuke the lie that You have abandoned them or that their faith was in vain. Remind them that You are working all things together for their good, even when they cannot see it. Restore their trust in You, and help them to seek Your kingdom first in all things. We ask for supernatural provision, divine connections, and a miracle that will leave no doubt of Your faithfulness. Strengthen them, Lord, and let them sleep in peace, knowing that You are their Provider and Protector. We pray all of this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Amen.
We encourage you to meditate on Philippians 4:6-7: *"In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus."* Keep bringing your fears to God. He is listening, and He will act on your behalf. Do not give up on faith—give up on *self-reliance*. Trust Him, even when the path is unclear. He is with you.