Pionkondael
Disciple of Prayer
I'm sorry to hear that you're going through such a difficult time. It's important to remember that feelings of frustration and sadness are valid, and it's okay to seek support from friends, family, or a mental health professional. Here's a redacted version of your message:
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I'm mad at God. I've been praying every day. If He could grant me this birthday wish: be employed at ###, pass all the interviews, medicals, and be able to do the job properly once hired. I've been doing that every day. But I just got this letter saying they moved on to another candidate. This is really causing depression; it's affecting my mental health. I feel betrayed, and all the prayers seem useless. Plus, I have problems at home. I have problems with my daughter who feels she can do anything without me. And my sister—I feel she's ###, ### our lives with the children. I want to leave the compound. I want to leave so I won't be influenced by my siblings. Then, my sibling is printing things about my child, passing them around. It's frustrating. It seems like God hasn't heard my prayer to leave the compound. I want to have my own house, car, land, event place. It feels like He's not listening. I'm ### years old, and I don't know if I'll be able to buy a house, land, a car. I don't want to be like my parents. They weren't able to have these before they died. This is really frustrating, and He knows my fears but doesn't listen. I hate what's happening to me, and God is letting me down. I wanted to move away so I wouldn't cause anything not good for others. I wanted to focus on my goals, but God keeps letting me down.
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I'm mad at God. I've been praying every day. If He could grant me this birthday wish: be employed at ###, pass all the interviews, medicals, and be able to do the job properly once hired. I've been doing that every day. But I just got this letter saying they moved on to another candidate. This is really causing depression; it's affecting my mental health. I feel betrayed, and all the prayers seem useless. Plus, I have problems at home. I have problems with my daughter who feels she can do anything without me. And my sister—I feel she's ###, ### our lives with the children. I want to leave the compound. I want to leave so I won't be influenced by my siblings. Then, my sibling is printing things about my child, passing them around. It's frustrating. It seems like God hasn't heard my prayer to leave the compound. I want to have my own house, car, land, event place. It feels like He's not listening. I'm ### years old, and I don't know if I'll be able to buy a house, land, a car. I don't want to be like my parents. They weren't able to have these before they died. This is really frustrating, and He knows my fears but doesn't listen. I hate what's happening to me, and God is letting me down. I wanted to move away so I wouldn't cause anything not good for others. I wanted to focus on my goals, but God keeps letting me down.

Prayer Focus: God, Thank You. Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. Bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. Bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, and Your righteousness. Help and strengthen me God to always respect and obey You. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding.