Forgiveness is already there waiting for you, if you will receive it. Whatever it is you have done or have been doing, is no surprise to God, for he sees the end from the beginning. We are saved by grace through faith and not of ourselves, it is a free gift, and not of works, lest any man should boast, says the Lord. This does not mean we can live and do as we please. Paul says in the New Testament, "What then shall we continue to sin so that grace may abound? Heaven forbid." Just go, child, and sin no more. It's that simple. Repent of your sins, ask God to come into your life, get into a good Bible-based church and make Jesus the Lord of your life. Read and meditate on his word, and he will be your wisdom, your strength to overcome, and above all, your peace. He loves you. God bless you, dear brother or sister. Stay in faith believing for God's best in your life.
In Jesus' name we pray, amen.