We understand the deep longing in your heart for a godly marriage, and we also hear the pain and frustration you’re carrying toward your father. Let us first address the anger and bitterness you’re feeling, for Scripture warns us in Ephesians 4:26-27, *"Be angry, and don’t sin. Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath, neither give place to the devil."* While your feelings are valid, holding onto anger can become a foothold for the enemy in your life. We must surrender this to the Lord, for He commands us in Colossians 3:13 to *"bear with one another, and forgive each other. If anyone has a complaint against another, even as Christ forgave you, so you must do."*
Your father’s desires for you may stem from his own fears, loneliness, or misplaced love, but his wishes do not align with God’s design for marriage. Genesis 2:24 declares, *"Therefore a man will leave his father and his mother, and will join with his wife, and they will be one flesh."* Marriage is God’s intention for His children, and it is not selfish to seek a spouse who will honor Him. However, we must also honor our parents as commanded in Exodus 20:12, *"Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land which Yahweh your God gives you."* This does not mean obeying them over God’s will, but it does mean showing respect and love, even in disagreement.
Your urgency for marriage must be balanced with trust in God’s timing. We see in 1 Corinthians 7:2 that *"because of sexual immoralities, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband."* If you are seeking marriage to flee from your current situation rather than to honor God, we encourage you to examine your heart. Marriage is not an escape—it is a sacred covenant that requires selflessness, patience, and a deep commitment to Christ. Proverbs 19:14 reminds us, *"House and riches are an inheritance from fathers, but a prudent wife is from Yahweh."* Your future spouse is a gift from God, and He will bring this person in His perfect time, not ours.
We also notice that your request does not invoke the name of Jesus, the only name by which we are saved and through whom we approach the Father. John 14:13-14 says, *"Whatever you will ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you will ask anything in my name, I will do it."* It is only through Christ that our prayers are heard, and we must always come before God in His name, acknowledging His lordship over our lives. If you have not yet surrendered your life to Jesus as your Lord and Savior, we urge you to do so now. Romans 10:9 tells us, *"that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved."* Without faith in Christ, we cannot expect God to answer our prayers as His children.
Let us pray together for you:
Heavenly Father, we lift up our sister to You, knowing that You see the deepest desires of her heart and the pain she carries. Lord, we ask that You would soften her heart toward her father, replacing anger with Your love and forgiveness. Help her to honor him in a way that pleases You, even as she seeks to follow Your will for her life. Father, we pray that You would prepare her heart for marriage, not out of desperation or frustration, but out of a desire to glorify You. Remove any idols from her heart—whether it be the longing for marriage itself or the bitterness toward her father—and replace them with a deep trust in You.
Lord, if it is Your will, bring a godly husband into her life, a man who loves You above all else and who will lead her in Your ways. But even more, we pray that she would find her fulfillment in You alone, knowing that You are enough. Help her to wait patiently, trusting in Your timing, and to use this season to grow closer to You. Surround her with godly counsel and community that will encourage her in her walk with You.
We rebuke any spirit of anger, bitterness, or impatience that may be at work in her life. By the power of the Holy Spirit, we command these things to flee in the name of Jesus Christ. Fill her instead with Your peace, Your joy, and Your patience as she waits on You.
Father, we also pray for her father. Soften his heart and open his eyes to Your truth. If his desires for her come from fear or selfishness, convict him and draw him to Yourself. May he come to know the love of Christ and release his grip on her life, trusting You with her future.
We ask all these things in the mighty and precious name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Amen.
Our sister, we encourage you to spend time in God’s Word daily, allowing Him to renew your mind and heart. Seek His kingdom first, and trust that He will add all these things to you (Matthew 6:33). Consider memorizing and meditating on Philippians 4:6-7: *"In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus."* God’s peace is available to you, even in this season of waiting.
Finally, we urge you to seek godly counsel, whether through a pastor, mentor, or biblical counselor, who can walk with you through these struggles. You are not alone, and God has not forgotten you. He is working all things together for your good (Romans 8:28), even when it feels like He is silent. Keep praying, keep trusting, and keep your eyes fixed on Jesus. He is faithful.