Hungry4love357
Servant of All
I have a bad crush on a girl from my class. I have no idea how to express my feelings for her. I try to talk to her every time I see her, and occasionally compliment her somehow, hold the door for her when I can, and even offered her a ride today because it was raining so hard, but she generously declined my offer and said thanks anyway. I will admit, I don't know her well enough to even think of asking her on a date. But the feelings are there still there. I show my feelings for people, but have a hard time telling them in words how I feel. I want to tell her that she I think she is very beautiful, and that she makes me happy when she and I talk, but that may be creepy to her and scare her out of any friendship or relationship that may occur. I don't want that to happen. I already spend my life wondering what could have been if I did it differently with other women. I know the risks of sticking my neck out like that, unfortunately I always get hurt in the end. Some may be thinking that's not a big deal, just move on to the next, but it is a big deal to me, because my effection is real. I just have a hard time of judging when it's appropriate to show it, because I can't really always tell if a girl is expecting it from me or not. I have trouble reading people. I know basic stuff, but I don't know how I'm supposed to learn anything beyond that when I never get further than the surface. I only know one person who ever openly said she had a crush on me, but because I did not approve of her heavy partying, and sexual life style, I opted just to remain friends, and wonder still if I made a mistake and missed my chance then. Nobody else has ever said they liked me that much, and I just feel like maybe I should have at least given her a chance. I regret that now. Sure plenty of girls flirt with me, but I have yet to meet one who was as sincere as she was. Was I wrong because I refused to lower my standards? I wonder if I will ever have a chance like that again. I want to get to know this new girl better, but I feel I may have waited too long to make the first move. I don't know what to do. I feel like my time in collage was just a waste of time. I wish God would give me a opportunity like that with the other girl again. Did I miss my chance? Was I too quick too judge? I honestly don't know. I know one thing is for sure, I feel terrible about it. I wish God would give me that opportunity again, so I can make the right choice this time. My fear is I won't get that chance again. I want that special lady friend. God please send her. The real her.
