We hear the deep pain, exhaustion, and despair in your words, and our hearts ache with you. What you are describing is not just hardship, it is spiritual warfare, and the enemy has been relentlessly attacking you, seeking to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10). But we want you to know this: you are not alone, and this is not over. The Lord sees every tear, every injustice, and every moment you’ve been targeted by darkness. He has not abandoned you, even when it feels like the world has.
First, we must address something critical in your request. You mentioned that praying feels like a "complete waste of time" and that you may stop altogether. Beloved, do not give up on prayer. The enemy wants you to believe that God is silent or indifferent, but that is a lie. The Bible tells us, "The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles" (Psalm 34:17). Prayer is not a transaction where we only get answers if we perform perfectly, it is a lifeline to the One who loves you more than you can imagine. Even if you don’t feel Him, He is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18). Do not let the enemy rob you of your connection to God.
You also mentioned leaving your current situation and changing your name in secret. While we understand the desperation to escape oppression, we must caution you: running without seeking God’s guidance can lead to more isolation. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths." Before making any drastic moves, we urge you to seek wise, godly counsel, perhaps from a pastor, a trusted Christian friend, or even a biblical counselor who can help you navigate this season with wisdom.
The abuse you’re enduring, both physically (like the hose attacks) and spiritually (the harassment, the hatred), is not from God. Jesus came so that you might have life abundantly (John 10:10), and He does not delight in your suffering. The people tormenting you are acting like the "evil takers" you described, but we rebuke that spirit in the name of Jesus. The Lord is your defender, your refuge, and your strong tower (Psalm 61:3). He will arise and scatter your enemies (Psalm 68:1).
You also expressed deep loneliness and despair, believing there will never be love in your life. This is another lie from the enemy. God is love (1 John 4:8), and He has not forgotten you. Even if human relationships have failed you, His love is unshakable. Psalm 27:10 says, "When my father and my mother forsake me, then the Lord will take me up." You may feel abandoned, but He is holding you. And as for earthly love, if you desire marriage, we pray for a godly spouse who will cherish and protect you, not another source of pain. But first, you must find healing in Christ.
Now, let us pray over you:
"Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up our sister who is under attack. Lord, You see every injustice, every word spoken against her, every act of cruelty. We rebuke the spirit of oppression, hatred, and violence in Jesus’ name. We declare that no weapon formed against her will prosper (Isaiah 54:17). Father, be her shield, her fortress, and her deliverer. Surround her with Your angels and hide her in the shadow of Your wings (Psalm 91:4).
Lord, she is weary and feels alone. Remind her that You are near to the brokenhearted and save those who are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). Restore her hope, Father. Let her feel Your presence in tangible ways, through Your Word, through the kindness of others, through moments of peace. Heal the wounds of betrayal and rejection. Replace her despair with Your perfect love, which casts out all fear (1 John 4:18).
Father, we ask for wisdom for her next steps. If it is Your will for her to leave her current situation, make the path clear. Provide safe refuge, provision, and godly people to walk with her. Protect her children and pets as she seeks a way forward. And if she stays, Lord, give her strength to endure and the courage to set boundaries against abuse.
We pray for her stepfather and all who have harmed her. Soften their hearts, Lord. If they are acting out of their own pain or demonic influence, break those chains. Let them see the error of their ways and turn to You.
Most of all, Father, we pray that she would know You are fighting for her. You are the God who parts seas, who shuts the mouths of lions, who raises the dead. What is impossible for man is possible for You (Luke 18:27). Renew her faith, Lord. Let her see that even in this darkness, You are working all things together for her good (Romans 8:28).
We declare over her life: You are not forgotten. You are not abandoned. You are deeply loved by the Creator of the universe. Strengthen her, Lord. Fill her with Your peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). And help her to keep her eyes on You, the Author and Perfecter of her faith (Hebrews 12:2).
In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray. Amen."
Beloved, we know this pain is real, but do not lose heart. The enemy wants you to believe you’re defeated, but the truth is, the battle is already won. Jesus disarmed the powers of darkness at the cross (Colossians 2:15). You are not fighting for victory, you are fighting from victory. Keep pressing into God, even when it’s hard. His Word is a lamp to your feet and a light to your path (Psalm 119:105). You are not alone. You are seen. And you are deeply loved.