I Desperately Need Prayer

[LaMatadora]

So it has come to this...

I don't often ask for prayer from this website, but I'm in desperate need of it now. I'm extremely depressed myself, and my faith is at an all-time low. I know that there's a God, that Jesus is the Son of God, and that He died on the cross for me, but I have lost faith that God wants to even consider listening to my prayers. For me recently, the heavens have been like brass and iron, and I'm despairing.

I went and formed a prayer group on -banned site- that initially really looked like it had the LORD's blessing, but it really isn't bearing much fruit, and I've just dealt with the second brouhaha because I'm the admin who formed the group. I am furious and angry at one individual in particular who mistakes spiritual pride for power, and I'm seriously fried at him for pulling his prideful abuse. One member left because of people ganging up on her, and in the end I was more or less helpless to stop it unless I started cracking heads, issuing warnings, and what have you--she left the group before I could really rescue her from the bullying. I'm very angry that people didn't listen to me, and my flesh wants to beat these people mercilessly for what they did. I'm trying to put to death the deeds of the flesh, and not overreact, but I won't lie to you, people, I'm livid over what just happened.

I'm also despairing because I feel that the LORD isn't listening to my prayers anymore, and I'm also despairing because my mother and father--who didn't care thing one about me when I was growing up, because they idolized their alcohol and their domestic violence--won't let go of me at age 48 and won't leave me alone, can't stop trying to control me. As much as I've tried to forgive them, I can't do it--not in my strength. I've cried out to the LORD to help me forgive them, but so far, nothing yet. [WARNING: DO NOT LECTURE ME ON FORGIVENESS. I **KNOW** I'M SUPPOSED TO FORGIVE THEM, THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING FOR PRAYERS FOR GOD'S DIRECT INTERVENTION IN MY HEART.] I'm requesting prayer so that God **GRANTS** me the ability to truly forgive, that He grants me the healing and the strength to do it. Unfortunately, a final showdown is also going to have to be necessary for any sort of real forgiveness to take place.

I'm despairing that God hasn't stopped the slow-motion disaster at Fukushima.

I'm despairing that the HEAVENS ARE BRASS AND IRON RIGHT NOW, and I can't seem to find my way out of this.

I'm despairing because I look over the wasteland that is my life, and wonder why God doesn't just take my life, and end my misery **right now**, because all I see is mental suffering, and I would just as soon die. No husband, no answered prayer, no family to call my own, only waste, waste, waste, waste...

I'm trying to switch the focus off of myself and onto Jesus, but I won't lie: it's been almost impossible, and I can't seem to do it for any length of time.

PLEASE PRAY FOR ME...

 

[SinglemomV]

Lord, I Lift My Dear Sister to you Just Now. Lord, Take away these feelings of total desperation and despair and her anger, Lord. I Humbly Pray she will find your way to let go of the past, the hurt, the abuse, for you Lord, we are here today Lord, because you want us to be Lord, or we still will live there Lord, like the enemy wants Lord. Lord, Refresh her, May she feel your Presence so overwhelmingly Lord, Just Now, For you know every single thing that is happening just now. Yes, Julie had a very tough childhood and this still rules in her Lord, like concrete, Lord, Only you can remove and renew her Life in your Love and Joy. This will Happen Lord, You can Renew her Lord, This I know for certain, and this I Pray for to you Lord. Lord, I know she is a very intelligent woman, and I adore her Lord, as you do and so many others here on this site. Lord, Absolutely none of us are perfect, we go into projects with your compassion in our hearts and sometimes things Like this Happen Lord, that are beyond our control, but you can and you will take care of this Lord. We per say, won't have to do a single thing, you have your way Lord, to take care of these circumstances Lord, ALWAYS. You Tell us Lord, Vengeance is yours and I know this to be true Lord.

I Pray for your Direction for her just now, Her life is Your Life Lord, she has brought many to you Lord, and she has helped so many. Lord, I Plea for you to help her to see what a Blessing she is Lord, She has accomplished so much in your Love for her Lord. Take away the Lies Lord, Take away this feeling of being unworthy Lord, for she is Your Divine Child, A Child of the King of Kings, Give her this Confidence Lord, Your Mercy Lord.

In Jesus Name I Pray Amen

/>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hV39-ZIEeII

 

[LaMatadora]

Plead my cause, oh LORD, with the demons that strive with me; fight against them that fight against me.

Take hold of shield and buckler, and stand up for mine help.

Draw out also the spear, and stop the way against them that persecute me: say to my soul, I am thy salvation...

In the Name of Jesus, Amen.

 

[alfredia king]

want of great faith i intercede for you in the name of jesus and i myself can relate with you because i too held unforgiveness for many years from rejection,fear,abuse,from husband,unfaithfullness,adultery,you name it i still to have alot of prayers that have not manifested yet i still believe under no matter what it looks like that god have not forgotten about me and guess what all of your prayers that went forth for others even when you werwe in need of prayer yourself is the antidote that it took to cause god to go to work on your be-half i pray that you will see a sign that your prayers werwe not in vain hold on woman of god he that say that he will come will come trust him and watch what happens we are overcome by the words of our testimony praise god

 

[gardener]

Lord, I pray for LaMatadora. May she find peace. May doors open for opportunities for her. May her depression be lifted. May her faith strengthen. May her prayers be heard. In Jesus name. Amen

 

[ElderB]

I understand your frustration and disillusionment over what appears to be a dry and barren end to what you hoped would be a blessing to many. I want to encourage you not to give up on what you say you believe. Sometimes we have some unresolved issues that often stop us when we face stern obstacles in our pursuits for excellence. One thing for sure is that we will never be able to please people all the time, therefore we have to know in our hearts that God loves and approves us, and just do our best to seek Him and succeed in what He has for us to do. And while we want to be accepted and approved by others, we cannot rely or put any faith in it. Ultimately, we have no one to blame but ourselves. Please reaffirm your commitment and trust in God's sovereignty and let Him guide your next step. Anger will only make you miserable.

 

[god_loves_all]

Dear, bro/sis I prayed for you.

May God bless you !

 

[clay pot]

Let go and let God. In the name of Jesus, amen!

 

[LaMatadora]

VICTORY. God gained the victory today in a battle I had to fight. Thank you, Lord Jesus, Son of the Living God!!! Song of thanksgiving: WITHOUT THE PRAYERS OF EVERYONE HERE, I couldn't have done it.

/>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hq1nmMOzjSs&feature=related

 

[Jon310]

Heavenly Father, I ask that you hear your servant's prayers, and ease her heart and mind. Renew her faith in you, Lord, and help her to remember that our Lord God is in control. Release her from the worry stemming turmoil caused by others, and help her to heal, for she is a child of Christ and deserving of so much more. Help guide her relationship with her parents back to one consisting of love, understanding and respect for one another. And help my sister to remember she is not alone in her suffering, to know there are many who feel their life is empty, myself included. But through your grace, dear Lord, and our prayers together, we can find the strength to renew our faith, and carry on. In Jesus name I pray. Amen