We hear the deep ache in your heart, and we want you to know that you are not alone—God sees your pain, your loneliness, and your longing for love that honors Him. Your struggle is real, and we grieve with you over the way you’ve been treated by men who sought only to gratify their own desires rather than cherish you as a daughter of the King. The fact that you have stood firm in your faith, even in tears, is a testament to the Holy Spirit’s work in you. Do not let the enemy convince you that your worth is tied to the rejection of those who failed to see your value. You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), and your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). The men who pressured you for sex outside of marriage were not just rejecting you—they were rejecting God’s design for purity and love. Fornication is a sin against your own body and against God (1 Corinthians 6:18), and we praise you for refusing to compromise, even when it cost you emotionally.
Your question about whether God wants you to be alone is one many believers wrestle with, but let us assure you: God’s heart is not to withhold good things from His children. Jesus said, *"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!"* (Matthew 7:9-11). If marriage is His will for you, He will provide a godly husband in His timing—a man who loves Jesus more than he loves you, who will lead you spiritually, and who will honor your purity rather than demand you compromise it. But we must also prepare your heart for this truth: if God’s plan for this season is singleness, He will give you the grace to walk in it with joy and purpose. The apostle Paul spoke of the gift of singleness as an opportunity to serve the Lord without distraction (1 Corinthians 7:32-35). Your worth is not defined by your relationship status but by your identity in Christ.
We are deeply concerned, though, by the pattern you’ve described—seeking relationships with men who do not share your faith or your commitment to purity. The Bible is clear: *"Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what communion has light with darkness?"* (2 Corinthians 6:14). If you are repeatedly finding yourself in situations where men disrespect your boundaries, it may be time to ask the Lord to examine your heart: Are you seeking validation from the wrong places? Are you pursuing relationships with men who do not love Jesus, hoping they will change? Beloved, a godly marriage begins with a godly courtship, and a godly courtship begins with two people who are already sold out for Christ. We urge you to step back from dating altogether for a season and ask the Lord to heal your heart, renew your mind, and prepare you for the spouse He has for you—if that is His will. In the meantime, surround yourself with believers who can speak truth into your life and hold you accountable. If your church does not have a strong community, seek one out where you can grow in faith and fellowship.
Your grief over your father’s death is also something we lift before the Lord. Loss can leave deep wounds, and it’s possible that your longing for love is tangled with the void his absence left. Jesus is the Father to the fatherless (Psalm 68:5), and He wants to comfort you in ways no earthly relationship can. We pray that you would allow Him into that broken place, trusting that He collects every tear you’ve shed (Psalm 56:8). As for your mother and sister, we ask the Lord to soften their hearts toward you and give you wisdom in how to communicate your needs. Sometimes, family members don’t understand because they don’t share our faith or our convictions. But even if they never do, you are not abandoned—you have a heavenly Father who understands you perfectly.
Lastly, we notice that your prayer did not invoke the name of Jesus. There is no other name under heaven by which we are saved (Acts 4:12), and it is only through Christ that we have access to the Father (John 14:6). If you have not already, we urge you to surrender your life fully to Jesus, confessing Him as Lord and believing in your heart that God raised Him from the dead (Romans 10:9). If you *have* trusted in Christ but have not been praying in His name, we encourage you to do so, for Jesus Himself said, *"Whatever you will ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you will ask anything in my name, I will do it"* (John 14:13-14). There is power in the name of Jesus—power to heal, to deliver, and to restore.
Now, let us pray for you:
Heavenly Father, we lift our sister before You, knowing that You see her pain and collect every tear she has cried. Lord, she has been wounded by the selfishness of men who sought only to use her, and her heart is heavy with loneliness and grief. We ask You to bind up her broken heart (Psalm 147:3) and remind her that she is *yours*—bought with the precious blood of Jesus. Father, forgive her for any times she may have sought love or validation outside of You, and lead her into a season of healing and preparation. If it is Your will for her to marry, we pray You would bring a godly man into her life—a man who loves You wholeheartedly, who will lead her spiritually, and who will honor her purity. But if Your plan for her is singleness, grant her contentment and joy in serving You without distraction. Break any ungodly soul ties from past relationships and restore her confidence in Your goodness.
Lord, we rebuke the lies of the enemy that tell her she is unlovable or that she must compromise to be wanted. Your Word says she is *chosen*, a royal priesthood, holy and dearly loved (1 Peter 2:9). Let her find her identity in You alone. Comfort her in her grief over her father’s death, and be a Father to her in ways no earthly man can. Soften the hearts of her mother and sister toward her, and surround her with godly community that will uplift and encourage her.
Most of all, Father, draw her closer to Yourself. Let her find in You the love she longs for, the validation she seeks, and the purpose she was created for. Fill her with Your Holy Spirit, that she may walk in wisdom, discernment, and purity. We pray all this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, who alone is worthy of all praise and glory. Amen.
Beloved sister, we leave you with this promise: *"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit"* (Psalm 34:18). Cling to Him. Seek Him first (Matthew 6:33), and trust that He will either fulfill the desires of your heart or replace them with something even better—Himself. Stay in the Word, stay in prayer, and do not lose hope. We are praying for you.