We hear your deep concern and fear for your boyfriend, and we want to come alongside you in prayer and biblical counsel. First, let us address the nature of your relationship. Scripture is clear that intimacy and emotional bonds outside of marriage can lead to heartache and sin. The Bible instructs us in 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what communion has light with darkness?" If your boyfriend is not a believer in Jesus Christ, or if he is not living in a way that honors God, this relationship may be causing you more harm than good.
Additionally, if you are engaging in any physical intimacy outside of marriage, we must rebuke that firmly. Hebrews 13:4 says, "Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the bed be undefiled; but God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers." Fornication is a sin, and it grieves the heart of God. We urge you to consider stepping back from this relationship until it can be pursued in a way that honors God, either through repentance, godly change, and a commitment to marriage, or by releasing it entirely if it is leading you away from His will.
Now, let us turn to the issue of alcoholism. Alcoholism is a destructive force that not only harms the body but also enslaves the soul. Proverbs 20:1 warns, "Wine is a mocker and beer a brawler; whoever is led astray by them is not wise." Your boyfriend is in bondage to this sin, and his refusal to acknowledge it is a sign of spiritual blindness. We must pray fervently for his eyes to be opened to the truth and for his heart to be softened to receive help.
We also want to address your fear. Fear is not from God. 2 Timothy 1:7 tells us, "For God didn’t give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control." Your fear may be a sign that you are relying on your own strength rather than trusting God to work in this situation. We encourage you to surrender your fears to Him and trust that He is in control.
Let us pray together:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this young woman and her boyfriend to You. Lord, we ask that You would break the chains of alcoholism in his life. Soften his heart to recognize his need for You and for healing. Father, we rebuke the spirit of addiction in the name of Jesus Christ, and we declare freedom over him. If this relationship is not in Your will, we ask that You would make that clear to her and give her the strength to walk away. If there is hope for redemption and restoration, we pray that You would guide them both toward repentance, godly change, and a commitment to honor You in all things.
Lord, we also pray for this young woman’s heart. Remove any fear, anxiety, or codependency that may be keeping her bound to this relationship. Fill her with Your peace, wisdom, and discernment. Help her to see herself as You see her, precious, loved, and called to walk in holiness. If marriage is Your plan for them, we pray it would be built on a foundation of faith in You, with both of them committed to living according to Your Word.
Father, we know that salvation is found only in the name of Jesus Christ. If this young man does not know You as his Lord and Savior, we pray that he would come to repentance and faith in You. There is no other name by which we can be saved (Acts 4:12), and we ask that You would draw him to Yourself. For this young woman, we pray that she would continue to grow in her relationship with You, seeking Your will above all else.
We ask all these things in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Amen.
In closing, we encourage you to seek godly counsel from a pastor or a Christian mentor who can walk with you through this difficult time. Surround yourself with believers who will pray for you and hold you accountable. If your boyfriend is open to it, encourage him to seek help through a Christian recovery program or a local church that offers support for addiction. Above all, trust in God’s plan for your life, knowing that He is faithful to complete the good work He has begun in you (Philippians 1:6).