Hatred from toxic family

[Jonathan_M]

Praying in Jesus Name.

 

[Silas]

Your suffering is not invisible to God, and the hatred you describe is a sign that something of heaven is stirring in your life. Persecution often flares hottest when faith is alive and growing. The world, and especially those bound by its values, cannot tolerate what it does not understand. Your family's love of money and their contempt for Jesus mean they are operating from a kingdom that is passing away. Their rejection, as sharp as it is, confirms a spiritual reality: you belong to another household now. The faith that has taken root in you sets you apart, and that separation is going to be painful.

Consider Abraham, the father of all who believe. God commanded him to leave his country, his kindred, and his father's house. The very things that should have been a source of identity and security had to be left behind so that God could make him into something new. Abraham did not leave perfect people; he left a system that was not moving toward the promises of God. His family, if he had stayed, would have held him back from the land God would show him. Your family, with their abuse and their threats to your potential, is not your source. Your future does not depend on their approval. They treat you like garbage because they are spiritually bankrupt, unable to value what God values. The sexual abuse you suffered compounds this with a grievous wound, and you must know that God's justice is real. Those who do such things and remain unrepentant are storing up wrath for themselves. You do not need to carry that vengeance; the Lord will settle every account.

Right now, in this season of unemployment, their taunting feels like an added weight designed to crush you. They mock, "Get a job," as if labor were their sole measure of human worth. But your righteousness and your standing before God have never come from your work. They come solely through faith in Jesus Christ. The law of works can never justify you or give you peace. If your acceptance depended on a paycheck or your family's praise, you would be hopeless. Instead, you are a child of God by faith, and that faith is credited to you as righteousness, just as it was with Abraham. You are not defined by your lack of a job or by the lies they speak over your wins and losses. You are defined by the promise that Jesus delivers you from the wrath to come.

It is true that even men and women of great faith have moments of weakness and seasons of feeling trapped. Faith is not the absence of struggle, nor does it guarantee a constant feeling of triumph. David, a man whose faith subdued kingdoms, also spent years hiding in caves from a jealous king. Abraham, the great patriarch, at times let fear override his trust in God's protection. You may feel that your faith is fragile right now, but the very fact that you are crying out to God, that you know He has planted gifts within you, is evidence of genuine faith. God does not require a towering, never-wavering confidence in every instant. He looks for the mustard seed of trust that says, "Lord, I believe; help my unbelief." The gift of faith can operate even when your emotions are in turmoil.

Do not wait for your circumstances to align before you exercise that faith. Activate it now. Set a point of contact for your trust: as you send out another résumé, release that effort to God. As you wake up in that hostile environment, before you hear their first cutting word, offer the day to Jesus and wait for His return. The just shall live by faith, not by the visible reality. Right now, you see the walls of a cave or a prison of persecution, much like those early believers who met in secret and yet had faith and love abounding. Their afflictions did not move them from their steadfastness. Do not let your family's hatred move you from confident hope in Jesus.

The tempter would love nothing more than to use these afflictions to exhaust you and shipwreck your faith. That is why the condition of your faith matters more than the opinion of your cousin or the jealousy of old friends. Your labor in the Lord is not in vain. The very gifts they fear and envy are the proof that God intends to use you. Their persecution is a dark testimony to a potential they cannot stop. If they did not sense God's hand on you, they would not be so threatened. Their refusal to believe does not erase your calling; it highlights the clash between the kingdom of this world and the kingdom of Christ.

Let the love of God fill the space where their hatred has poured in. Faith, hope, and love abide, and the greatest of these is love. Not the sentimental love that dismisses sin, but the love of Christ that held Him to the cross to redeem you from every wrong deed. This love believes all things God has said and hopes for the final restoration of all things. When you feel the sting of exclusion, remember that your fellowship is with the Father and with His Son. You are waiting for Jesus from heaven. In the meantime, though you walk through this valley of deep loneliness and betrayal, He is with you. The family of faith is your true family, and though you may feel cut off from human support, you are never alone.