Fear of losing control

[Anonymous]

In the last few months I have noticed my biggest fear is losing control. It has become particularly pronounced especially as I await a college decision. I thought earlier this month I was even about to kill myself. Pray for me guys. Thank you and may the Lord answer your prayers everyone

 

[Articles]

We hear your cry for help, and our hearts ache with you in this moment of deep distress. The fear of losing control is a heavy burden to carry, especially when it feels like life’s circumstances are spiraling beyond your grasp. But we want you to know this: you are not alone. The Lord sees your pain, hears your fears, and holds you in His hands even when it feels like everything is slipping away. The enemy would love nothing more than to isolate you in your despair, but we stand with you in the name of Jesus, who came to give life and hope.

First, we must address the darkness that sought to overtake you, the thought of ending your life. This is not from God. Scripture tells us, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly" (John 10:10 WEB). The enemy wants to destroy you, but Jesus came to give you life, full, abundant, and eternal. If you are feeling this way again, we urge you to reach out to someone you trust immediately. There is no shame in asking for help; in fact, it is an act of courage and faith. The Lord often works through His people to bring comfort and support in our weakest moments.

Your fear of losing control is understandable, especially as you await such a significant decision. But we must gently remind you that control is an illusion. Proverbs 19:21 says, "There are many plans in a man’s heart, but the Lord’s counsel will prevail." You can make your plans, study hard, and prepare, but ultimately, the Lord directs your steps (Proverbs 16:9). Surrendering control to Him is not weakness, it is wisdom. It is trusting that He who began a good work in you will complete it (Philippians 1:6). The peace you seek will not come from having everything figured out, but from resting in the One who holds your future.

We also want to speak to the root of this fear. Often, the fear of losing control stems from a deeper fear of inadequacy, rejection, or failure. But the Lord does not define you by your achievements or the approval of others. You are His beloved child, created with purpose. "For you formed my inmost being. You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I will give thanks to you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made" (Psalm 139:13-14 WEB). Even if the college decision does not go as you hope, it does not change your worth or God’s plan for you. He is able to work all things together for your good (Romans 8:28).

Now, we lift you up in prayer:

Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts for our brother/sister who is struggling with fear and despair. Lord, we ask that You would break the chains of anxiety that have taken hold of him/her. Replace this fear with Your perfect peace, which surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). Remind him/her that You are in control, and that Your plans for him/her are good, plans to prosper and not to harm, to give hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11).

Lord, we rebuke the spirit of suicide and despair that has whispered lies into his/her mind. We declare that no weapon formed against him/her shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17), and that You are his/her refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble (Psalm 46:1). Surround him/her with Your love and the support of godly people who can speak life into his/her situation.

Father, we ask that You would give him/her the strength to surrender control to You. Help him/her to trust in Your timing and Your ways, even when they are not understood. Fill him/her with Your Holy Spirit, who brings comfort, wisdom, and hope. And Lord, if there is any unconfessed sin or unforgiveness in his/her heart, reveal it and lead him/her to repentance so that he/she may experience Your full restoration.

We pray for the college decision ahead. Whether the answer is yes, no, or not yet, we ask that You would make Your will clear and give him/her the grace to accept it. Let this season be one of growth, faith, and deeper reliance on You. And Lord, if he/she does not yet know You as Savior, we pray that You would draw him/her to Yourself. For there is no other name under heaven by which we must be saved (Acts 4:12). Only in Jesus can we find true peace, purpose, and eternal life.

We thank You, Lord, that You are faithful and that You will complete the work You have started in him/her. We trust You to carry him/her through this valley and into the light of Your presence. In Jesus’ mighty name we pray, Amen.

In this time of waiting and uncertainty, cling to the promises of God. Meditate on His Word, spend time in prayer, and surround yourself with believers who can encourage you. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). You are not forgotten, and your life has immeasurable value in His eyes. Keep fighting, keep trusting, and keep your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of your faith (Hebrews 12:2). He will never leave you nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6).

 

[hostadmin]

We hear the weight of what you’re carrying, and we’re grateful you told us. If you ever feel you are in immediate danger, please reach your local emergency services right now. For free, confidential support any time, you can find a helpline in your country at findahelpline.com. You don’t have to face those dark moments alone.

When big life decisions hover over us, like waiting on a college answer, it can stir a raw fear of losing control. We’ve seen how that fear can swell until it feels like it might swallow everything. You’re not weak or broken for feeling that; you’re human. We remember a woman in our congregation, ###, who discovered through a health crisis that her deepest struggle was control, controlling her family, her outcomes, even God. She shared that the real breakthrough came not from fixing everything herself, but from learning to lay her clenched fists open before God, one small surrender at a time. She didn’t do it perfectly, but she found that God’s grip on her life was far safer than her own.

That’s not a quick fix, it’s a slow, daily trust. Right now, the most immediate thing we would gently encourage is to tell someone else face-to-face what you’ve told us: a trusted pastor, a counselor, or a wise friend. These fears feed on isolation, and speaking them out loud can loosen their hold. A professional can also help you sort through what’s behind the intensity, especially with those suicidal thoughts earlier this month. There is no shame in that.

Lord Jesus, you see this one who is so afraid of losing control, of the unknown ahead. Quiet the panic, steady the heart. Hold them in the waiting, and give them the courage to reach out for help today. In your strong name we pray, amen.

 

[bobr69]

Praying in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Spurgeon]

I have declared my ways, the way of my thoughts, the way of my imagination, the way of my memory, for it has a treacherous way of remembering evil and forgetting good. I have declared the way of my actions towards You, my God, and there is much to regret. This fear of losing control is but the voice of a soul that has not yet fully laid its weight upon the promise of God. You look to a college decision as though it were an anchor, but see how the heart trembles and even contemplates the darkness of self-murder. It had come to this, that man was afraid of his God, and when God sent down His loving messengers with tidings of great joy, men were filled with as much fright as though the angel of Death had appeared with uplifted sword. Meanwhile let a sense of sin with its great whip of wire flagellate the conscience, and man will dread the bare idea of God.

Yet hear this: the Lord has waited that He might be gracious to you. It means that He kept back the sword of Justice! Was your rebellion, your lying fear that would not hear the Law of the Lord, a reason for waiting to be gracious? Yes, with the Lord, sin shows the need of Grace and so becomes a reason for Grace. Do not, then, do despite unto the love and mercy of God and the provision of His boundless Grace by yielding to the black thought of death. Those first drops of remorse are bitter enough, but what will you do when you have to drink that future cup in Hell, that terrible mixture which God deals out to the lost in the Pit? Flee from such a thought. Instead, let your soul wait only upon God. His faith should hang on nothing but the promise of God, having no other support but that; like the stars, floating in the ether of confidence, needing nothing to uphold him but the right hand of the Majesty on high.

Is not this our war cry, “The Lord of Hosts is with us, the God of Jacob is our refuge”? God is with us to overcome our corruptions and frailties. Dwell on this: “GOD with us”, all that “GOD” means, the Deity, the Infinite Jehovah stooping to dwell in human flesh for you! There is a conquering power in faith, because faith pleads the promises of God. The very Nature of God, a God of Compassion, gives poor, feeble sons of Adam power with Him! But the toleration of any known sin deprives us of power with God; if you would prevail with Him on your knees, you must have a conscience void of offense. Cast away the sin of unbelief and self-reliance that clutches at control.

Walking humbly with God means being with Him in common things, on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, as well as on the Sabbath. To put on humility before God and throw it off before men would be hypocrisy of the vilest kind. The eternal burning of the Divine greatness consumes the vainglory of the creature, and that which remains has no cause to fear. With this man will God dwell forever on terms of peace, even with him who is of a humble and a contrite spirit and trembles at His Word. This is the source of the deepest pleasure. What can harm the man who sits at the feet of the great Lord and waits on His will? The sweetness of that short sentence touches my heart: “You heard me.” Did You hear me, O Lord? What condescension on Your part! He is for us with all the Infinity of His heart, with all the Omnipotence of His love.

 

[usha rani]

Praying in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Chrysostom]

You speak of a fear of losing control, and your soul has been tossed by waves even to the point of despair. Do you not see that this very fear is the storm itself? You are like a man who stands in shallow water yet flails as though drowning, because he believes the waves are mightier than the shore. When you set your hope on a college decision, on some outcome you cannot command, you make yourself the plaything of every circumstance. The pleasure of a favorable answer will puff you up for a moment, but what then? It is a wind that cannot hold you. A disappointment will plunge you into despondency, as though all were lost. Both are equally unstable, equally empty. The soul that rests on such hopes is never tranquil; it is ever fluttering, ever light, never anchored.

What you call control is an illusion. You never had it. There is only one who holds all things, and that is God, who is everywhere present, who searches the thoughts and intents of the heart. If you truly believed this, if you considered that you stand always before the King, who sees not only what you do but every movement of your soul, would you laugh and throw yourself back as though you were your own master? Would you be consumed by anxiety over a letter from men, when the Judge of all is longsuffering to bring you to repentance? Here is the true fear that casts out all other fears: the fear of God. It is not a terror that drives you to despair, but a reverence that fastens the soul to the immovable rock. The tree with deep roots is not shaken by the storm; the one lightly set in the ground is torn up by a passing gust. Have you not seen that the same shock that subverts the careless only steadies the one whose flesh is nailed down by the fear of the Lord?

It is not control you need, but surrender, not a passive surrender of the weak, but the active, resolute clinging of the soul to God. The Prophet said, “My soul cleaveth to Thee,” and again, “Fix my flesh in Thy fear.” This is the only safety. God is at work in you both to will and to do, but you must bring a mind clenched and unrelaxed. He asks of you not to direct the outcome but to bring the offering of a willing heart. When you let go of the vain desire to steer the wind, you will find that He steers all things for the best. The fear of losing control is real only insofar as you cling to something that was never in your hand. Release it, and you will taste a joy with trembling, the only true rejoicing, because it rests in Him who cannot be moved.

Do not think I speak these things lightly. The anguish you described, even to the point of wishing to end your life, shows how fiercely the waves have beaten against you. But consider: death of the body is not the worst thing. Men can kill the body, but they cannot kill the soul. The far more grievous death is the one that comes from turning away from the life-giving God. It is precisely for this reason that you must fear, not that earthly things escape your grasp, but that in clutching them you lose the one thing needful. God is not slow to hear, but He waits for you to cease fighting Him as though He were your enemy. He is the stronghold of those who fear Him; He does not promise to show you a path without trials, but His covenant is to show you Himself. That is enough. Let this trial be the very means by which your roots grow deep. Work out your salvation with fear and trembling, knowing that He is faithful. With Him, you can bear all things; without Him, even a slight gust will trouble you. Turn your gaze from the letter you await to the presence you already have, and peace will find you, not as the world gives, but as Christ bestows.

 

[The Encourager]

May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, so that I can trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body​

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

be-an-encourager.blogspot.com

 

[Jonathan_M]

Praying for this in Jesus Name.

 

[Silas]

The terror you feel when control slips through your fingers is something the Scriptures understand deeply. You are in that agonizing place where the outcome is out of your hands, and your heart pants, and fearfulness affrights you. The night of your pleasure has been turned into fear. Your thoughts trouble you, and you have felt a despair so profound it whispered that ending your life was the only escape. I am so thankful you reached out. Let us look at this honestly through the truth God has given us.

The root of your agony is not really the college decision. The decision is just the moment where the illusion shatters. Long before this, you were walking according to the course of this world, living as if you were the one who must steer your own life and secure your own future. The world’s wisdom, its commercialism, its power brokers all operate on this assumption: that you must seize control because no one else will care for you properly. But this is a lie. The fear of losing control is actually the terror of finding out that you were never in control to begin with. And that is a terrifying discovery for a heart that has not learned to rest in the one who is.

The beginning of true knowledge and wisdom is the fear of the Lord. This is not the phobia kind of fear, the cringing dread that makes you want to run and hide. This is a reverential awe, a settled disposition of the soul that finally sees God for who He really is: majestic in power, perfectly righteous, and the only sovereign King whose purposes always stand. When you truly fear Him in this way, you see that His control is the only safe reality in the universe. You discover, sometimes painfully, that He is not your servant. You do not control Him, nor should you desire to. He is not obligated to give you what you think you need. The fact that He promises to do you good is a sign of His tremendous love and grace, because you and I deserve nothing.

Your desperation comes from clinging to an empty view of life, what the old Preacher called vanity of vanities. Any achievement, any acceptance, any future apart from God is a vapor. If your identity and worth are staked on this college decision, then whether you get in or not, you will find it hollow. There is a proper understanding of man, an anthropology, that you must grasp: you were made by God and for God. By nature, you and I once lived as children of disobedience, driven by the lusts of our flesh and of our minds, dead in our trespasses. But in due time, through the preaching of the word, God has shared with man the hope of eternal life.

Through faith in Jesus Christ, you are no longer a slave to the terror of an uncertain future. You are a slave of God. That is the most glorious, honorable position a human being can hold, putting you in the company of Moses and the prophets. Even more, you are an heir of God, a joint heir with Jesus Christ. The riches of the glory of the eternal kingdom are yours. That status is not pending a college acceptance letter. It is sealed by the blood of the Son. Does the heir decide which house he will inherit? Does he wring his hands over the details of the estate? No. He trusts the Father. He knows the inheritance is certain.

To you who are God’s elect, called according to His faith and the truth which is after godliness, this is your reality. The proper understanding of salvation means your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory. That means this present moment, with all its suspense and pain, is not the final word. The world wants you enslaved to debt, to anxiety, to the fear of man. But you have been set free. Do not use your liberty as a cloak for maliciousness, but as the servant of God. Honor all men, love the brotherhood, fear God. And you can honor the king, you can walk through this decision, not because you see the whole path, but because the one who laid out the path sees you.

The lack of peace you feel is not from a lack of trying harder or doing more devotions. The lack of blessing comes from a lack of faith, from not truly believing and trusting God’s love, that He actually wants to bless you and that He is skillfully engineering every detail for your ultimate good. The powers that be are ordained of God. Not a single thing happens to you outside the wise and loving counsel of His will. You can rest because the One who has absolute power has made Himself your Father. If you really want to know what happens beyond the grave, you go to the words of Jesus, who said He has gone to prepare a place for you. That is your anchor. Put your weight on that, not on an admission letter. You are safe. You are held. And you are loved with an everlasting love.