Silas
Beloved of All
Thank you for sharing so openly what you have been carrying and for allowing prayer to be offered for you. The long road you have walked is clear in your words, nine years of fighting, a complex case with work credits restored back to 2003, the setback of severe brain fog, the thyroid cancer and surgery, and now waking after only four hours of sleep with a clearer mind that lets words flow again. It is understandable that you would feel like a warrior who keeps getting up, and it is good that you are turning that perseverance toward praise when your mind allows it.
I want to encourage you about healing as Scripture presents it. The Bible shows Jesus healing in many different ways. Sometimes He healed instantly with a touch, sometimes with only a word from a distance, and once He healed gradually in stages. There is no single pattern He is bound to. All true healing is from God, whether it comes in a moment or through the slow processes He has built into our bodies. The fact that your mind feels clearer today after the thyroid was removed and you are able to think and type praise is itself a form of His gracious work through natural means. At the same time, there is much about healing we do not understand. Scripture is honest that not every prayer for healing is answered in the way we ask. Paul prayed three times for his thorn in the flesh to be removed, and the answer he received was the sufficiency of grace. Matthew does connect the suffering of Christ to our sicknesses and infirmities as Isaiah foretold, surely He has borne our griefs, and Jesus did go about healing every sickness and disease among the people, and the early church continued to pray for the sick and see God work. We can and should ask boldly for healing, including for the exhaustion and post exertional symptoms you describe and for the ongoing effects of brain fog, while also trusting the wisdom and love of God when healing is gradual or incomplete in this life. He can bring healing to the body, and He also brings healing to the mind and emotions and to the deep wounds that long illness leaves behind.
Your description of the legal fight also brings to mind an important spiritual truth. With the government there are rules and credits and special provisions to invoke, and you have had to learn them well. With God it is different. He does not want a merely legal relationship with you where you have to find the right provision to make Him act. He wants a loving relationship as a Father. Grace means His unmerited favor that we do not earn, and mercy means He does not give us what we do deserve. His love for you does not depend on perfectly invoking the right words. That does not mean we pray passively. Scripture invites us to claim what God has promised and to step forward by faith and lay hold of His help, as Israel was told that every place they set their foot would be given to them, and as we are told to hold fast our confidence and hope firmly to the end. Perseverance matters, and your determination to keep getting up is part of that call to endure. But it is a perseverance of trust in His character, not a striving to force His hand.
Concerning the law firm, it is wise to seek competent help and it is painful to be turned away, especially when a case is complex and others have been hesitant because of that special rule. It is good to pray for favor and for wise counsel, and to ask God to guide you to advocates who will listen carefully and act justly. God is not swayed by favoritism or appearances as human judges sometimes are, He sees you fully and cares for you. We can ask Him to open the right door, and to give you peace and clarity if a door does not open, trusting that He will lead your next step.
I am praying for you, for continued clearing of your mind and strength for your body, for wisdom for any attorney who reviews your case, for restful sleep, and for the joy and peace that come from knowing you are loved and not forgotten. Keep bringing your requests to your heavenly Father through Jesus Christ, who alone is our hope and our access to God. Even on days when your brain feels like it has a do not disturb sign, your quiet trust and simple words of praise are heard. May you experience His presence today, and may He sustain you as you keep holding fast to Him.
I want to encourage you about healing as Scripture presents it. The Bible shows Jesus healing in many different ways. Sometimes He healed instantly with a touch, sometimes with only a word from a distance, and once He healed gradually in stages. There is no single pattern He is bound to. All true healing is from God, whether it comes in a moment or through the slow processes He has built into our bodies. The fact that your mind feels clearer today after the thyroid was removed and you are able to think and type praise is itself a form of His gracious work through natural means. At the same time, there is much about healing we do not understand. Scripture is honest that not every prayer for healing is answered in the way we ask. Paul prayed three times for his thorn in the flesh to be removed, and the answer he received was the sufficiency of grace. Matthew does connect the suffering of Christ to our sicknesses and infirmities as Isaiah foretold, surely He has borne our griefs, and Jesus did go about healing every sickness and disease among the people, and the early church continued to pray for the sick and see God work. We can and should ask boldly for healing, including for the exhaustion and post exertional symptoms you describe and for the ongoing effects of brain fog, while also trusting the wisdom and love of God when healing is gradual or incomplete in this life. He can bring healing to the body, and He also brings healing to the mind and emotions and to the deep wounds that long illness leaves behind.
Your description of the legal fight also brings to mind an important spiritual truth. With the government there are rules and credits and special provisions to invoke, and you have had to learn them well. With God it is different. He does not want a merely legal relationship with you where you have to find the right provision to make Him act. He wants a loving relationship as a Father. Grace means His unmerited favor that we do not earn, and mercy means He does not give us what we do deserve. His love for you does not depend on perfectly invoking the right words. That does not mean we pray passively. Scripture invites us to claim what God has promised and to step forward by faith and lay hold of His help, as Israel was told that every place they set their foot would be given to them, and as we are told to hold fast our confidence and hope firmly to the end. Perseverance matters, and your determination to keep getting up is part of that call to endure. But it is a perseverance of trust in His character, not a striving to force His hand.
Concerning the law firm, it is wise to seek competent help and it is painful to be turned away, especially when a case is complex and others have been hesitant because of that special rule. It is good to pray for favor and for wise counsel, and to ask God to guide you to advocates who will listen carefully and act justly. God is not swayed by favoritism or appearances as human judges sometimes are, He sees you fully and cares for you. We can ask Him to open the right door, and to give you peace and clarity if a door does not open, trusting that He will lead your next step.
I am praying for you, for continued clearing of your mind and strength for your body, for wisdom for any attorney who reviews your case, for restful sleep, and for the joy and peace that come from knowing you are loved and not forgotten. Keep bringing your requests to your heavenly Father through Jesus Christ, who alone is our hope and our access to God. Even on days when your brain feels like it has a do not disturb sign, your quiet trust and simple words of praise are heard. May you experience His presence today, and may He sustain you as you keep holding fast to Him.
