cesar00
Banned
Today is day forty of my fast, people ask me how long this is going to continue, I answer I do not know, it is not up to me, it is up to You Lord. They say but forty days is the time Jesus fasted in the desert, I ask "So what, I am not Jesus. I must fast as long as He thinks it is necessary for me to do it. He is the boss, I am His servant." Some look at me in admiration, some think I am crazy, and yet others, who knows. Any ways I made a promise and I will continue until something happens. I see Lord your hand in many things around me, around my family. I see it Lord, and that is why I know I am doing the right thing offering you this time and this sacrifice. My wife worries about my health, I just tell her it is not miune, It is Your Lord. You are the center of my life, you are mu light and my beacon, even though I sometimes fail you and loose my temper and act stupidly, with a little prayer and reflection the waters return to their course. Lord I know that many things that have happened these past few days are the works of the devil, the evil one trying to tempt me, trying to make me change my mind and weaken my resolve. Yes Lord I know that, it was him who had my electricity cut offand it is him making me hungry. It is him Lord putting negative thoughts into my mind, but My Dear Jesus, I am Your servant, Yours and only Yours, I follow the path you have laid before me. I berlieve he now knows that my resolve and my trust is in you and he will not be able to change this. THIS IS WHY LORD I ONCE AGAIN COVER MY HOME, MY FAMILY, MY FRIENDS WITH YOUR HOLY BLOOD , LORD, WITH THE POWER OF THE SPIRIT SO HE KNOWS THAT HE IS NOT WELCOME, THAT WE FOLLOW YOU AND NO ONE ELSE. Thank you My Lord, thank you for all you do for us every day.
Lord today is not a happy day, there is a lot of turmoil in my mind, I am not at peace. I feel there are many things I have not cleared with you, I feel theree are things standing between you and me, between me and the path you have prepared for me. My Lord, I feel there are many sins and actions from my past I have not spoken to you about, in fact I am sure there are many of these which I do not even remember. I wonder how I can be forgiven for something that I do not remember I did. You know me LOrd, you know where I have been and what I have done, every moment of my life, my thoughts, my feelings you know Lord. You know more than i do, DDear Jesus all those years I spent doing drugs and whatever else came with them, you know My Lord many of these incidents were erased from my mind, from my heart, many of them weere painful others were just drug induced or whatever, the point is My Dear Jesus, HOW DO I ASK FOR YOU TO FORGIVE SOMETHING I DO NOT REMEMBER?? Dear Jesus it is difficult, in fact it is embassing and humiliating to come before you and say "" Lord there are bad things, terrible things I have done I do not remember them. I just know I did them." It is true though and I am begin for your forgiveness with regards to theswe things, I am begging you to enlighten me, to open my heart and the darkests corners of my mind wehre these memories are stored, I need to see them Lord, to relive them because they are the road to cleansing my heart and mind. My Lord I have said over and over again that there is a connection missing, that there is a road I feel is blocked and closed. The road that connects my heart to my mind, tyhe road that makes usws true Chrisitans, true followers of your Word. It is the road where WE THINK WITH OUR HEART!!!! Yes, My Lord I know this is possible and people whodo this are people who are really close to you, atoned to your wishes and your love and mercy. Dear Jesus dealing every day with You and your ways is out of context, it has nothing to do with every day life, with logic and with what 99.5% of humantity consider normal and correct. No My Lord dealing and interacting with you day afterday requires the ability to REALLY believe that the impossible is possible, that the unmeasurable can be measured and that the darkness can be turned into light, dealing with you every day Lord is accepting that pain can be turned into happiness and disease can be turned into health, that death can be turned into life, BY FAITH ONLY, BY BELIEVEING THAT IT CAN BE DONE. This Lord is not easy to deal with, it is not easy to swallow and act upon. TThat is why My Lord, we must become children to live with you, to deal with you, children belive in Peter Pan, and Mickey Mouse, they believe that a fairy takes their tooth and gives them a dollar, they belive their parents can and will protect them against anything, daddy is Superman and mom is Wonder Woman. Children are innocent, THEY BELIVE THEY DO NOT DOUBT, this is the hardest part of trying to live by your rules Lord. Believing without a doubt that your promises are real and your teachings are true and that You can do anything you want to do. Our adult minds, shaken by suffering, by pain, by shots of reality and misery, greed, hate amd so many other things have a hard time coming to terms with the fact that WE ARE EMPOWERED BY YOU AND YOUR PROMISES TO HEAL THE SICK, TO BE HAPPY, TO BE PROSPEROUS, TO MAKE THE DEAD WALK, yes, You have given us all these powers, and each one of us, God''s warriors has them, we are just afraid to use them, WE ARE NOT SURE THEY WILL WORK, OUR FAITH IS WEAK AND SMALL, our faith starts in our mind and ends before it reaches our heart. There is wehre the problem lies.
Day after day we come into this place of worship asking our brothers and sisters to pray for us and our problems, WHY do we do this? There should be no need for us to pray for each other, WE ARE YOUR SOLDIERS, WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO PRAY FOR OURSELVES AND HEAL OURSELVES AND OUR LOVED ONES, BECOME PROSPEROUS AND LIVE THE WAY YOU WANT US TO, THE WAY YOU PLANNED US TO LIVE. We should be praying for the people who do not believe in your might, in your mercy, in your love, these are the people we should dedicate our time to, not to each other. I cansee this every day when I sit with my daughter and talk about God and Jesus and the prophets, about miracles, parting oceans and plagues, My Lord, she is the greatest example you have sent me, I thank you for this, her eyes twinkle Lord and I can see in her mind, in her heart the scenes of you might one after the other and she laughs and she enjoys each minute of them. Why? Because she is pure, because she is innocent, because My Lord Jesus SHE BELIVES WITH HER HEART AND HER BRAIN TOO!!!!!!!! That is why Lord I come before you on my knees today, I dcome to beg you open my heart, open the hidden recesses of my mind where all the pain, the hurt, the resentment and all the dirt is hidden, the real stuff that my mind and heart have refuses to remember, to relive even aft6er so many years, Dear Jesus I beg you give me the strength and the determination, to see all these things, to live this pain, to cry for the things I cannot take back, the courahe to fix those I can and the resolve and courage to never offend you again My Lord Jesus.
Dear Jesus I beg you for all those who read this prayer, touch them Lord, allow them to look into their souls too, let them come before you in humbleness and repentance, forgive them LOrd, forgive their sins and thier pains and their fears, for none of us should fear anything, none of us should suffer for anything or cry avout anything for we are your children Lord and wer were made to your liking. Dear Jesus I beg you turn us into children, may mour hearts and our minds return to the times when we spent Christmas Eve preparing Santa's milk and cookies, when we looked up to the sky and waited for his sleigh to go by., Dear Jesus to the time when the stork brought our brothers and sisters and we hated girls with a passion but loved our friends and neighbors with all our hearts. Bring us back Lord to the times when our parents were the law and they were undefeatable and loving, when a cxaress from the was a gift and a word was listened to intently. When we saw them bow their heads before thier parents, our grand parents in love and respect. Lord make Peter Pan and the fairies come back into our lives so that we can come closer to you, so that we can speak with our guardian angels and we can see grandpa and grandma staring down at us from heaven. Deasr Lord allow us to come before you as children so that we can see your face and your beautiful smile shinning upon us. Lord may we feel your touch and the warmth of your hand when we are good, and your soft voice of reprimand when we stray. Lord open our hearts and minds to your truth, the only truth, Dear Jesus allow us to be worthy of your love and care. Tha nk you Jesus in you we trust.
Lord today is not a happy day, there is a lot of turmoil in my mind, I am not at peace. I feel there are many things I have not cleared with you, I feel theree are things standing between you and me, between me and the path you have prepared for me. My Lord, I feel there are many sins and actions from my past I have not spoken to you about, in fact I am sure there are many of these which I do not even remember. I wonder how I can be forgiven for something that I do not remember I did. You know me LOrd, you know where I have been and what I have done, every moment of my life, my thoughts, my feelings you know Lord. You know more than i do, DDear Jesus all those years I spent doing drugs and whatever else came with them, you know My Lord many of these incidents were erased from my mind, from my heart, many of them weere painful others were just drug induced or whatever, the point is My Dear Jesus, HOW DO I ASK FOR YOU TO FORGIVE SOMETHING I DO NOT REMEMBER?? Dear Jesus it is difficult, in fact it is embassing and humiliating to come before you and say "" Lord there are bad things, terrible things I have done I do not remember them. I just know I did them." It is true though and I am begin for your forgiveness with regards to theswe things, I am begging you to enlighten me, to open my heart and the darkests corners of my mind wehre these memories are stored, I need to see them Lord, to relive them because they are the road to cleansing my heart and mind. My Lord I have said over and over again that there is a connection missing, that there is a road I feel is blocked and closed. The road that connects my heart to my mind, tyhe road that makes usws true Chrisitans, true followers of your Word. It is the road where WE THINK WITH OUR HEART!!!! Yes, My Lord I know this is possible and people whodo this are people who are really close to you, atoned to your wishes and your love and mercy. Dear Jesus dealing every day with You and your ways is out of context, it has nothing to do with every day life, with logic and with what 99.5% of humantity consider normal and correct. No My Lord dealing and interacting with you day afterday requires the ability to REALLY believe that the impossible is possible, that the unmeasurable can be measured and that the darkness can be turned into light, dealing with you every day Lord is accepting that pain can be turned into happiness and disease can be turned into health, that death can be turned into life, BY FAITH ONLY, BY BELIEVEING THAT IT CAN BE DONE. This Lord is not easy to deal with, it is not easy to swallow and act upon. TThat is why My Lord, we must become children to live with you, to deal with you, children belive in Peter Pan, and Mickey Mouse, they believe that a fairy takes their tooth and gives them a dollar, they belive their parents can and will protect them against anything, daddy is Superman and mom is Wonder Woman. Children are innocent, THEY BELIVE THEY DO NOT DOUBT, this is the hardest part of trying to live by your rules Lord. Believing without a doubt that your promises are real and your teachings are true and that You can do anything you want to do. Our adult minds, shaken by suffering, by pain, by shots of reality and misery, greed, hate amd so many other things have a hard time coming to terms with the fact that WE ARE EMPOWERED BY YOU AND YOUR PROMISES TO HEAL THE SICK, TO BE HAPPY, TO BE PROSPEROUS, TO MAKE THE DEAD WALK, yes, You have given us all these powers, and each one of us, God''s warriors has them, we are just afraid to use them, WE ARE NOT SURE THEY WILL WORK, OUR FAITH IS WEAK AND SMALL, our faith starts in our mind and ends before it reaches our heart. There is wehre the problem lies.
Day after day we come into this place of worship asking our brothers and sisters to pray for us and our problems, WHY do we do this? There should be no need for us to pray for each other, WE ARE YOUR SOLDIERS, WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO PRAY FOR OURSELVES AND HEAL OURSELVES AND OUR LOVED ONES, BECOME PROSPEROUS AND LIVE THE WAY YOU WANT US TO, THE WAY YOU PLANNED US TO LIVE. We should be praying for the people who do not believe in your might, in your mercy, in your love, these are the people we should dedicate our time to, not to each other. I cansee this every day when I sit with my daughter and talk about God and Jesus and the prophets, about miracles, parting oceans and plagues, My Lord, she is the greatest example you have sent me, I thank you for this, her eyes twinkle Lord and I can see in her mind, in her heart the scenes of you might one after the other and she laughs and she enjoys each minute of them. Why? Because she is pure, because she is innocent, because My Lord Jesus SHE BELIVES WITH HER HEART AND HER BRAIN TOO!!!!!!!! That is why Lord I come before you on my knees today, I dcome to beg you open my heart, open the hidden recesses of my mind where all the pain, the hurt, the resentment and all the dirt is hidden, the real stuff that my mind and heart have refuses to remember, to relive even aft6er so many years, Dear Jesus I beg you give me the strength and the determination, to see all these things, to live this pain, to cry for the things I cannot take back, the courahe to fix those I can and the resolve and courage to never offend you again My Lord Jesus.
Dear Jesus I beg you for all those who read this prayer, touch them Lord, allow them to look into their souls too, let them come before you in humbleness and repentance, forgive them LOrd, forgive their sins and thier pains and their fears, for none of us should fear anything, none of us should suffer for anything or cry avout anything for we are your children Lord and wer were made to your liking. Dear Jesus I beg you turn us into children, may mour hearts and our minds return to the times when we spent Christmas Eve preparing Santa's milk and cookies, when we looked up to the sky and waited for his sleigh to go by., Dear Jesus to the time when the stork brought our brothers and sisters and we hated girls with a passion but loved our friends and neighbors with all our hearts. Bring us back Lord to the times when our parents were the law and they were undefeatable and loving, when a cxaress from the was a gift and a word was listened to intently. When we saw them bow their heads before thier parents, our grand parents in love and respect. Lord make Peter Pan and the fairies come back into our lives so that we can come closer to you, so that we can speak with our guardian angels and we can see grandpa and grandma staring down at us from heaven. Deasr Lord allow us to come before you as children so that we can see your face and your beautiful smile shinning upon us. Lord may we feel your touch and the warmth of your hand when we are good, and your soft voice of reprimand when we stray. Lord open our hearts and minds to your truth, the only truth, Dear Jesus allow us to be worthy of your love and care. Tha nk you Jesus in you we trust.
