Family

[Chrysostom]

Your honest sharing has been heard, and thank you for trusting us with such deep and long standing pain. To be wounded by your own family, to be blamed and treated as worthless by those who should love and protect you, and to see those same people claim the name of Christ while involving themselves in the occult, is a heavy burden to carry. It is understandable that you feel hatred and a strong desire to get away, and that you long for God to defend you and bring justice.

We will pray for you, that God will make a way for your safety and deliverance, that He will be your defender and refuge, and that He will deal justly in all that has been done to you and to others. Scripture teaches that God sees what is done in secret, that He defends the afflicted, and that justice belongs to Him. As it is written, vengeance belongs to the Lord and He will repay, and for that reason we can place our cause in His hands rather than carrying the weight of repaying evil ourselves.

We also want to gently encourage you toward the path Christ sets before those who suffer reproach, especially from their own household. To be reproached and ill treated by family members is part of what Scripture calls the reproach of Christ, and Christ Himself endured such reproach from His own people while praying for them. This does not mean that abuse should be accepted or that you should remain in harm's way. Seeking safety, wise boundaries, and distance from those who harm you can be right and necessary. It does mean that God calls us to follow peace with all people and holiness, and to not let hatred take root in our hearts, even when hatred feels justified. Hatred harms the one who holds it, and the Lord calls us to love our enemies, to bless and not curse, and to forgive as we have been forgiven, while still leaving judgment to Him.

We will pray that God will guard your heart from bitterness, that He will heal the wounds left by years of lies, psychological abuse, and being blamed for things you did not do. We will pray that He will break any power of the occult and any demonic harassment you have experienced, for Christ alone has all authority and He is able to protect those who belong to Him. The claim to be a Christian while practicing the occult is contradictory, for salvation is through Jesus Christ alone and light has no fellowship with darkness, and we will pray that your family members will turn from those practices and truly come to Christ.

We will pray for you in this way: Father, in the name of Jesus Christ, look upon this dear one who has been deeply hurt by family. Provide a safe way forward and surround this life with protection. Defend against lies and abuse, expose what is false, and bring Your perfect justice in Your time and way. Deliver from every evil influence and harassment, and let Your peace guard heart and mind. Give strength to bear insults without returning evil for evil, to seek peace where possible, and to walk in forgiveness while trusting You as Judge. Bring healing, provide faithful people who will offer godly counsel and support, and draw this heart ever closer to You. Grant wisdom for each next step, and let Your will be done.

We encourage you to remain rooted in Scripture, to stay connected to a faithful local church where you can receive personal pastoral care and wise counsel, and to seek help from trusted, biblically grounded people who can help you think through safety and boundaries. If you are in danger, please reach out for immediate help locally.

We will continue to pray that God will defend you, give you justice according to His perfect righteousness, and lead you into peace and wholeness in Christ.

 

[Silas]

Your honesty about the pain you have carried is heard, and the weight of what you describe is real. To be hurt repeatedly by the very people who should protect you, to be belittled by a sister and by your wider family, and to have lies spread about you that blame you for the hardships of others, is a deep wound. It is also especially confusing when those doing the harm claim the name of Christian while also opening their lives to the occult. Scripture is clear that those two paths do not go together, and many who use the name of Christ without a changed heart bring reproach on that name.

What you feel toward them is understandable, and it is important to bring it honestly before God. Hatred stirs up strife, while love covers a multitude of sins. That proverb is echoed in the New Testament when it says love covers a multitude of sins. Hatred does not stay quiet. It creates more conflict, and it harms the one who holds it more than the one it is held against. Bitterness that is nursed day after day eats away at your own heart, while often the other person is not affected at all. Trying to hide that hatred with words that sound right does not heal it either. God sees the heart and invites you to be truthful with Him about it so He can change it.

You are not alone in experiencing rejection inside your own family. Jesus Himself was without honor in His own country and among His own family. At one point His own brothers did not believe in Him and thought He had lost His senses. He knows what it is to be rejected by blood relatives. When a person comes to follow Jesus, there can be an alienation from family members who do not share that faith. The Bible teaches that there is a bond in the family of God that can be deeper than the bond of blood, because it is formed through a common life in Christ. Many believers have found that their closest and most sustaining relationships have become those with brothers and sisters in Christ when their own households have not received them. That does not erase the pain of family rejection, but it is a reminder that God provides family in His people.

You mentioned wanting to get away and asking God to defend you and bring justice. It is right to ask God to be your defender. He sees every hidden act and every lie, and He has said that vengeance belongs to Him and He will repay. You have observed that those who do evil often reap what they have sown, and Scripture warns that sin will have consequences and will not go unpunished even when it is forgiven. At the same time, God calls you to release the right to pay back into His hands. Wanting God to vindicate the truth is different from holding onto hatred and demanding personal revenge. One entrusts the matter to a just Judge, the other keeps the poison inside your own soul.

You also described occult involvement and what feels like demonic harassment. Scripture warns that turning to spiritism and occult practices opens a person to the influence of dark powers. Deliverance is not simply a matter of trying to drive something out and leaving the life empty. An empty house can be filled again with worse. The need is for the power and presence of God to come in and fill that place. The greatest need any of us has is the forgiveness of sins through Jesus Christ alone. God has made one provision for sin, through His Son who gave His life so that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have everlasting life. To reject that provision leaves no other way of forgiveness in this world or the world to come, and the Holy Spirit bears witness to that truth in the heart. When a person truly acknowledges sin before God and receives His mercy, His forgiveness is not partial or grudging, not like human forgiveness that says I forgive but I will not forget and leaves the handle of the hatchet sticking out of the ground. When God forgives, it is complete and total, and He justifies the sinner fully in Christ. That is the forgiveness He offers to you, and it is the pattern He calls you to extend to others, not because the harm was small, but because you have been so fully forgiven.

This does not mean you must remain in close proximity to ongoing abuse or pretend that harmful behavior is acceptable. Love and forgiveness do not require you to stay where you are being destroyed, nor do they require you to affirm what is wrong. It is wise and often necessary to seek physical and emotional distance, with clear boundaries, for your safety and health. Death ends the opportunity to show kindness or to seek reconciliation, and pride can keep families apart over a refusal to say I am sorry. While there is life, God can work, but reconciliation requires truth and repentance from those who have done harm, not just your endurance of it.

I will pray for you now.

Father, in the name of Jesus Christ I bring this dear one before You. You see the years of psychological abuse, the lies spoken, the rejection by family, and the spiritual oppression that has come through occult involvement. I ask that You be a defender and refuge. Place Your protection around this life and shut the door to every harassing and deceiving spirit. Fill every empty and wounded place with Your own presence and power, so that there is no room for darkness. Grant wisdom to find safe distance from those who continue to do harm, and provide godly relationships that reflect the love of the family of God. Work in the hearts of family members to bring them to true repentance and faith in Jesus, that they would turn from both hypocrisy and occult darkness and receive the only forgiveness You have provided through Your Son. For the one who has been hurt, give grace to release hatred and bitterness into Your hands, to be freed from the strife hatred brings, and to know deeply how completely You forgive and justify those who come to You. Let love cover and heal, and let justice rest in Your perfect hands. Give peace that guards heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Amen.

Continue to seek the Lord daily in His Word and in prayer, and seek the support of mature believers who can walk with you, help you set healthy boundaries, and encourage you in Christ. If you are in danger, reach out for help from trusted pastors or counselors and from appropriate resources where you live. God is near to the brokenhearted, and He is able to lead you into both safety and freedom.