ERASE MY WORDS!
My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. James 1:19-20
Lord, please erase my words that I have said in anger, the wrong tone or with a critical tongue. Lord, forgive me. Help me not to react to my spouse's or other people’s words of accusation or blame. Instead, may I pray for Your divine guidance and for You to empower me to control my wounded, hurting emotions and speak the words with love and with how You want me to answer. Lord, also show my spouse or children their own weaknesses in talking to me if they are not speaking respectfully or in love. In Jesus’ Name I pray. Amen."
How many times have you cried out to the Lord and prayed a prayer after a telephone conversation with your husband or wife ended abruptly, got totally out of control or your spouse walks out the room or the door angry?
"Lord, erase all my words that I may have spoken in a wrong tone, in the wrong way, or I spoke with a critical or demeaning tone to my spouse's heart and mind that they may not remember my words or the event. Lord, I pray that You will even soften their heart and have them call back and we both apologize. Lord, radiate Your love through me every time I talk to my beloved husband or wife whether they are gone or we are in the process of dating or in the process of marriage restoration. Thank You, Lord, You are changing my heart, one day at a time. In the name of Jesus I pray. Amen."
I do not think any one of us really truly understand how we sound when we get upset or have had a bad day and we often let it out on the ones we love the most. When the telephone rings and you see it is your spouse, do you say a prayer to guard your mouth that you do not lose control of your words or tone in your voice? Ask the Holy Spirit for Him to teach you how to answer your spouse so that the Lord will get the glory and your husband/wife can see a change in your words, actions and behavior regularly. You can personalize these scriptures in a prayer with your beloved spouse’s name or your children’s name in them.
He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin. Proverbs 13:3
Set a guard over my mouth, O LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips. Psalm 141:3
A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered. Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue. Proverbs 17:27-28
How many marriages do you know that have marriage problems or are divorced due to all the words that have been said in the heat of strife and anger? Are you the victim of one who was verbally abusive to you with a rampage of insults and blaming you for everything that is wrong? Bob and I could personally relate as that was one of the main problems in our marriage. This is not only a problem that can happen between spouses, but we know of parents, teenagers or adult children who will lose their temper in talking to each other. This week may you strive to start improving your communication skills. At work or at home when two people start to communicate will you learn to take turns in talking and listening? By the way, listening means to not already be thinking of your answer before the other person finishes speaking! Yes, you will have to break some habits that will change you forever.
Let me share three steps that may help you personally and that you can teach your children how not to react to other people's words or behavior:
Be quick to listen.
Slow to speak.
Slow to become angry.
Ask the Lord how to answer or how to react at that moment.
Stop the conversation, but agree to continue later when both parties have had a time apart to cool off and one can pray.
Imagine if all our family members, friends and co-workers would apply these principles to their own personal lives. What would happen in your own life at home or at work? How many people do you know who have had to take anger management classes? Do you know how many couples have the police come out due to fighting or screaming as a neighbor may have called the police? How were you raised? Often your childhood experiences may determine how you talk or will react to controversy or strife. But, you do not have to live like your parents or grandparents lived all their lives. Do you want to teach your children how to live and communicate in a home environment with their future husband or wife?
If you are a new Christian or have been a Christian for several years, you can change your words, your behavior and your countenance by the power of the Holy Spirit. You can also pray that the Lord will remove all generational sins such as divorce, anger, rage, abuse, alcohol, drugs or gambling by the Blood of your Lord Jesus Christ for your own family and your spouse’s side of their family that are being passed down from one generation to another.
You can ask the Lord to change your heart and your mind to act, react and live as Jesus would. I taught my children and now my grandchildren a saying, “What would Jesus do?†That will usually solve any outbursts or wanting to prove a point or win an argument. The stakes are too high when we have to be right most of the time, or we have to have the last word, or we cannot walk away from strife or an argument. Teach your children to go and take a break, stop the discussion for another time, go to another room and cool-off.
Now is that not an awesome idea for a couple? Let’s start implementing it and try it on the telephone or in person. If you will ask the Lord to remove the strife or anger from your home, He will give you many different ideas of how to make peace. May I remind you of a powerful truth: Never forget that the Holy Spirit will empower you by the Fruit of the Spirit which includes love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. If you start a fight or say wrong words or scream, say you are sorry immediately and ask for forgiveness from your spouse and especially from your children. Your spouse will hear or see the change in your words, behavior and tone of voice. Use peace and self-control every day in your life and marriage! Your Lord will be proud of you!
Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For, “Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech. He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.†Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened." But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. 1 Peter 3:8-17
What a powerful passage that you need to apply to your Christian walk. When you put these scriptures into actions, you will be blessed mightily!
Believe in the Lord's power,
Charlyne Steinkamp
Rejoice Marriage Ministries, Inc.
My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. James 1:19-20
Lord, please erase my words that I have said in anger, the wrong tone or with a critical tongue. Lord, forgive me. Help me not to react to my spouse's or other people’s words of accusation or blame. Instead, may I pray for Your divine guidance and for You to empower me to control my wounded, hurting emotions and speak the words with love and with how You want me to answer. Lord, also show my spouse or children their own weaknesses in talking to me if they are not speaking respectfully or in love. In Jesus’ Name I pray. Amen."
How many times have you cried out to the Lord and prayed a prayer after a telephone conversation with your husband or wife ended abruptly, got totally out of control or your spouse walks out the room or the door angry?
"Lord, erase all my words that I may have spoken in a wrong tone, in the wrong way, or I spoke with a critical or demeaning tone to my spouse's heart and mind that they may not remember my words or the event. Lord, I pray that You will even soften their heart and have them call back and we both apologize. Lord, radiate Your love through me every time I talk to my beloved husband or wife whether they are gone or we are in the process of dating or in the process of marriage restoration. Thank You, Lord, You are changing my heart, one day at a time. In the name of Jesus I pray. Amen."
I do not think any one of us really truly understand how we sound when we get upset or have had a bad day and we often let it out on the ones we love the most. When the telephone rings and you see it is your spouse, do you say a prayer to guard your mouth that you do not lose control of your words or tone in your voice? Ask the Holy Spirit for Him to teach you how to answer your spouse so that the Lord will get the glory and your husband/wife can see a change in your words, actions and behavior regularly. You can personalize these scriptures in a prayer with your beloved spouse’s name or your children’s name in them.
He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin. Proverbs 13:3
Set a guard over my mouth, O LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips. Psalm 141:3
A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered. Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue. Proverbs 17:27-28
How many marriages do you know that have marriage problems or are divorced due to all the words that have been said in the heat of strife and anger? Are you the victim of one who was verbally abusive to you with a rampage of insults and blaming you for everything that is wrong? Bob and I could personally relate as that was one of the main problems in our marriage. This is not only a problem that can happen between spouses, but we know of parents, teenagers or adult children who will lose their temper in talking to each other. This week may you strive to start improving your communication skills. At work or at home when two people start to communicate will you learn to take turns in talking and listening? By the way, listening means to not already be thinking of your answer before the other person finishes speaking! Yes, you will have to break some habits that will change you forever.
Let me share three steps that may help you personally and that you can teach your children how not to react to other people's words or behavior:
Be quick to listen.
Slow to speak.
Slow to become angry.
Ask the Lord how to answer or how to react at that moment.
Stop the conversation, but agree to continue later when both parties have had a time apart to cool off and one can pray.
Imagine if all our family members, friends and co-workers would apply these principles to their own personal lives. What would happen in your own life at home or at work? How many people do you know who have had to take anger management classes? Do you know how many couples have the police come out due to fighting or screaming as a neighbor may have called the police? How were you raised? Often your childhood experiences may determine how you talk or will react to controversy or strife. But, you do not have to live like your parents or grandparents lived all their lives. Do you want to teach your children how to live and communicate in a home environment with their future husband or wife?
If you are a new Christian or have been a Christian for several years, you can change your words, your behavior and your countenance by the power of the Holy Spirit. You can also pray that the Lord will remove all generational sins such as divorce, anger, rage, abuse, alcohol, drugs or gambling by the Blood of your Lord Jesus Christ for your own family and your spouse’s side of their family that are being passed down from one generation to another.
You can ask the Lord to change your heart and your mind to act, react and live as Jesus would. I taught my children and now my grandchildren a saying, “What would Jesus do?†That will usually solve any outbursts or wanting to prove a point or win an argument. The stakes are too high when we have to be right most of the time, or we have to have the last word, or we cannot walk away from strife or an argument. Teach your children to go and take a break, stop the discussion for another time, go to another room and cool-off.
Now is that not an awesome idea for a couple? Let’s start implementing it and try it on the telephone or in person. If you will ask the Lord to remove the strife or anger from your home, He will give you many different ideas of how to make peace. May I remind you of a powerful truth: Never forget that the Holy Spirit will empower you by the Fruit of the Spirit which includes love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. If you start a fight or say wrong words or scream, say you are sorry immediately and ask for forgiveness from your spouse and especially from your children. Your spouse will hear or see the change in your words, behavior and tone of voice. Use peace and self-control every day in your life and marriage! Your Lord will be proud of you!
Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For, “Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech. He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.†Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened." But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. 1 Peter 3:8-17
What a powerful passage that you need to apply to your Christian walk. When you put these scriptures into actions, you will be blessed mightily!
Believe in the Lord's power,
Charlyne Steinkamp
Rejoice Marriage Ministries, Inc.
