Entrusting ### ♥️ ❤️❤️
- Thread starter Craurath
- Start date
Silas
Faithful Servant
You long for a relationship that honors God, and that desire is good. But notice what your prayer reveals: you are looking intently at this man and your communication with him, hoping he will grow in courage, become intentional, and move toward you. Your focus is on the horizontal relationship, and you are asking God to shape that person and those circumstances according to what looks good to you. The deeper need, however, is not first about him or your contact, but about your own soul’s anchoring.
The central axis of your life is your relationship with God, the vertical plane. When that is right, when you are truly resting in a loving, intimate fellowship with your Creator, it will affect every other relationship. You will see people differently, your fears will quiet, and your capacity to love without grasping will grow. But if you are working frantically on this one earthly relationship while your own connection to God remains unsettled, other areas of your life will also fall out of balance. You will find yourself trying to manage him or manipulate circumstances through prayer, using godliness as a means to gain what you want. That turns a living faith into a hollow exchange.
What you need is not a formula to make him call or commit. You need to know God as your Father, in a way that is not legal or ritualistic but deeply personal. Effective prayer flows from relationship, not the other way around. You cannot have true fellowship with Him until you first establish that you are His and He is yours, not as a distant idea, but as a present, tender reality. And once that relationship is sure, you can seek Him early, you can pour out your heart, and you can trust His answer, even when it is not what you expected.
Consider the many prayers you offered: “if it is Your will … if it is good … if this is part of Your purpose.” That language sounds like surrender, but it can still carry an undercurrent of telling God how to direct another person’s heart. True abandonment to God means you place every hope into His hands without trying to script the outcome. You are not called to predict what God will do in this man’s life. You are called to make a total, restful commitment of your own life and your own future to the Lord. That is the place of perfect peace: not when he finally calls, but when your mind is stayed on Jesus, trusting His finished work for your salvation and His ongoing wisdom for your days.
Remember that fruit in your life, including the fruit of a healthy, Christ-exalting marriage one day, is the natural consequence of abiding in Christ. You cannot manufacture it by anxious effort or by trying to be righteous in order to earn a blessing. Your righteous standing before God is a gift through faith in Jesus. Rest in that. Then you will be able to love another person with the patience, kindness, and freedom from selfishness that you desire, because it will spring from the overflow of a heart that already knows it is fully loved.
So do not spend all your energy trying to get this one relationship right. Turn your face toward the Lord. Let His inward beauty become apparent in your own countenance, and let your relationship with Him grow deep and real. When your vertical axis is straight, you will know how to navigate the horizontal ones, including this one. If this friendship is meant to grow, God will make the way clear without your striving. If it is not, He will give you grace to let it go. In either case, your security rests not in a man’s response but in the covenant love of a faithful God who has already given you everything in His Son.
The central axis of your life is your relationship with God, the vertical plane. When that is right, when you are truly resting in a loving, intimate fellowship with your Creator, it will affect every other relationship. You will see people differently, your fears will quiet, and your capacity to love without grasping will grow. But if you are working frantically on this one earthly relationship while your own connection to God remains unsettled, other areas of your life will also fall out of balance. You will find yourself trying to manage him or manipulate circumstances through prayer, using godliness as a means to gain what you want. That turns a living faith into a hollow exchange.
What you need is not a formula to make him call or commit. You need to know God as your Father, in a way that is not legal or ritualistic but deeply personal. Effective prayer flows from relationship, not the other way around. You cannot have true fellowship with Him until you first establish that you are His and He is yours, not as a distant idea, but as a present, tender reality. And once that relationship is sure, you can seek Him early, you can pour out your heart, and you can trust His answer, even when it is not what you expected.
Consider the many prayers you offered: “if it is Your will … if it is good … if this is part of Your purpose.” That language sounds like surrender, but it can still carry an undercurrent of telling God how to direct another person’s heart. True abandonment to God means you place every hope into His hands without trying to script the outcome. You are not called to predict what God will do in this man’s life. You are called to make a total, restful commitment of your own life and your own future to the Lord. That is the place of perfect peace: not when he finally calls, but when your mind is stayed on Jesus, trusting His finished work for your salvation and His ongoing wisdom for your days.
Remember that fruit in your life, including the fruit of a healthy, Christ-exalting marriage one day, is the natural consequence of abiding in Christ. You cannot manufacture it by anxious effort or by trying to be righteous in order to earn a blessing. Your righteous standing before God is a gift through faith in Jesus. Rest in that. Then you will be able to love another person with the patience, kindness, and freedom from selfishness that you desire, because it will spring from the overflow of a heart that already knows it is fully loved.
So do not spend all your energy trying to get this one relationship right. Turn your face toward the Lord. Let His inward beauty become apparent in your own countenance, and let your relationship with Him grow deep and real. When your vertical axis is straight, you will know how to navigate the horizontal ones, including this one. If this friendship is meant to grow, God will make the way clear without your striving. If it is not, He will give you grace to let it go. In either case, your security rests not in a man’s response but in the covenant love of a faithful God who has already given you everything in His Son.
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