We thank you for sharing your heart so honestly and we rejoice that you are learning how to start prayer with the Lord, that is a beautiful and precious step of faith. God desires that we come to Him continually and He hears us when we pray. Philippians 4:6-7 says in nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus. James 1:5 also promises if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. We are asking for that wisdom for you now.
We see the burden you carry for your relationship with your daughter and we understand how painful it is when communication breaks down and you feel you cannot even give advice without fear. We want to gently remind you that we only have access to God the Father through Jesus Christ. You addressed the Lord, which is good, but Scripture is clear that it is only by the name of Jesus that we are saved and that we come boldly to the throne of grace. John 14:6 says Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. Acts 4:12 says there is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved. If you have not already, we encourage you to place your full trust in Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord, believing that He died for your sins and rose again, and to pray in His name. Romans 10:9 says that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. It is in Jesus name that we pray together with you now.
We also want to speak truth in love about what you have described. The enemy does seek to divide families, for Ephesians 6:12 reminds us our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world's rulers of the darkness of this age, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Yet James 4:7 tells us to be subject therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. And 1 John 4:4 assures us that greater is he who is in you than he who is in the world. We rebuke the work of the enemy against your relationship and we pray that every scheme to bring division, stubbornness, dishonesty and fear would be broken in Jesus name.
At the same time, we must address what you mentioned about lying. You are right to be troubled when your daughter lies to you instead of speaking honestly, even if she might fear your response. God calls us to truthfulness. Proverbs 12:22 says lying lips are an abomination to Yahweh, but those who do the truth are his delight. Ephesians 4:25 says therefore, putting away falsehood, speak truth each one with his neighbor. We pray that your daughter will understand that honesty, even when difficult, honors God and honors you as her mother, and that she will choose truth over deception. Exodus 20:12 commands honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land which Yahweh your God gives you. Ephesians 6:2-3 repeats honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise, that it may be well with you, and you may live long on the earth. This command does not end when a child is grown. Even as an adult daughter, she is called to honor you, and that includes respect in how she speaks and listens.
You said all you ask is for respect and that you are still a parent even though she is grown and you still provide for her if needed. That is both loving and biblical, and we commend your faithful heart to provide. We also want to encourage you with the balance Scripture gives to parents. Colossians 3:21 says fathers, do not provoke your children, so that they won't be discouraged. Ephesians 6:4 says you fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but nurture them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. As your daughter is grown, your role shifts from directing to guiding with grace, speaking the truth in love as Ephesians 4:15 teaches, and offering counsel without harsh judgment that might cause her to shut down. Proverbs 15:1 says a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. We encourage you not to live in fear of speaking to her, for 2 Timothy 1:7 says God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control. And 1 Peter 5:7 says casting all your worries on him, because he cares for you.
We pray together for you and for your daughter.
Father in heaven, in the name of Jesus Christ we come before You together and we lift up this dear mother and her grown daughter to You. Lord, we thank You that she is learning to pray and to seek You, draw her ever closer and teach her to hear Your voice and to rest in Your peace. We ask for Your wisdom and gentle courage to fill her, that she may speak to her daughter not out of fear but out of love and truth. Soften her daughter's heart, Lord, take away stubbornness and give her a new heart as You promise in Ezekiel 36:26. Convict her where she has chosen lies over truth and help her to understand that honoring her mother is honoring You. Heal the low place in their relationship, restore respectful communication, and help them to listen to one another with patience and forgiveness, as Ephesians 4:32 calls us to be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave us. Let truth and grace reign in their home, let the enemy flee, and let Your love cover and restore what has been strained. Provide for every need, guide this mother in how to help her daughter with both generosity and wise boundaries, and let their relationship be rebuilt on respect, honesty and Your love. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus, amen.
We encourage you to keep praying daily, to keep the door open for calm and gentle conversation, to speak truth without harshness, to forgive quickly, and to model the respect and honesty you desire to see. Trust the Lord to work in His timing, continue in His Word, and know that He cares deeply for both you and your daughter and is able to restore what feels low and broken.
