We hear the deep sorrow and regret in your heart, and we join you in lifting this burden before the Lord, for He alone is the One who can bring healing, restoration, and redemption to broken relationships and generational struggles. Your pain is real, and your desire for your children to know Christ is a godly longing that reflects the Father’s heart. Yet we must also address some things with truth and love, for God’s ways are not our ways, and His Word calls us to walk in faith, forgiveness, and obedience—even when it is difficult.
First, we commend you for your desire to see your children come to faith in Jesus Christ. There is no greater gift you could pray for them, for salvation is the most urgent need of every soul. However, we must gently but firmly address the decision to go "no contact" with your children. While boundaries are sometimes necessary for protection, Scripture does not support permanently severing ties with family unless there is unrepentant, severe abuse or danger that requires separation for safety. Even then, the door to reconciliation should remain open through prayer and a heart willing to forgive. The Bible calls us to love unconditionally, just as Christ loves us—even when we were yet sinners (Romans 5:8). Consider the words of Jesus in Matthew 5:44: *"But I tell you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who mistreat you and persecute you."* If we are called to love our enemies, how much more should we extend grace and patience to our own children, no matter how painful their choices may be?
You express regret over not raising them in church and the choices you made in their upbringing. This regret is understandable, but it must not lead to despair or a sense of finality. God is the God of redemption, and He can turn even our greatest mistakes into testimonies of His grace. The Apostle Paul reminds us in Romans 8:28: *"We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose."* Your past decisions do not have to define your children’s future. Instead, let this regret drive you to your knees in intercession for them, trusting that God’s power is greater than any failure on our part.
You also mention that church was "different and boring" and that the youth were separated from the adults. While it is true that some churches may struggle with engaging younger generations, this is not a reason to dismiss the body of Christ entirely. Hebrews 10:24-25 urges us: *"Let’s consider how to provoke one another to love and good works, not forsaking our own assembling together, as the custom of some is, but exhorting one another; and so much the more, as you see the Day approaching."* If the church you attended did not foster a love for God’s Word or unity among believers, we encourage you to seek out a biblical, Christ-centered church where the truth is preached without compromise and where families are discipled together. Your children need to see *you* living out your faith authentically, not just hearing words. Your repentance, your pursuit of holiness, and your love for Christ can become the greatest witness to them.
We must also address the bitterness and resentment that seem to linger in your heart toward your children, their father, and even your sister. Bitterness is a poison that harms us far more than it harms those we resent. Hebrews 12:15 warns: *"Looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and many be defiled by it."* Forgiveness is not optional for the believer—it is a command (Colossians 3:13). This does not mean excusing sin or enabling harmful behavior, but it does mean releasing the offense to God and trusting Him to deal justly with all things. Your children’s choices, your sister’s actions, and even the failures of their father must be surrendered to the Lord. Vengeance belongs to Him (Romans 12:19), and your role is to love, pray, and trust.
You mention praying that "### will do right by me and not cause me any more problems." We understand the frustration behind this, but we must remind you that our focus should not be on what others "owe" us or how they treat us, but on how *we* are called to respond in a manner worthy of the Gospel. Philippians 2:3-4 says, *"Doing nothing through rivalry or through conceit, but in humility, each counting others better than himself; each of you not just looking to his own things, but each of you also to the things of others."* Even in pain, we are called to humility and selflessness. If there are unresolved conflicts, we encourage you to seek reconciliation where possible, always speaking the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15).
Lastly, we notice that while you pray for your children and family, you do not explicitly invoke the name of Jesus Christ in your prayers. This is not a small matter. Jesus Himself said in John 14:6, *"I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me."* And in John 16:23-24, He tells us, *"Most certainly I tell you, whatever you may ask of the Father in my name, he will give it to you. Until now, you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be made full."* There is power in the name of Jesus, and it is only through Him that we have access to the Father. If you have not yet surrendered your life fully to Christ, we urge you to do so today. Confess your sins, turn from them, and place your faith in Him alone for salvation. There is no other name by which we can be saved (Acts 4:12).
Now, let us pray together for you and your family:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus, lifting up this dear sister who carries such a heavy burden of regret, sorrow, and broken relationships. Lord, You see the depths of her heart—the love she has for her children, the pain of her mistakes, and the weariness of hoping for change. We ask You to minister to her spirit right now, Father. Fill her with Your peace that surpasses all understanding and remind her that You are the God of redemption, able to turn ashes into beauty and mourning into joy.
Lord, we pray for her children. Softens their hearts, Lord, and draw them to Yourself. Remove any scales from their eyes that keep them from seeing their need for You. Raise up godly influences in their lives—believers who will speak Your truth in love and point them to the cross. Father, where there is rebellion, bring repentance. Where there is apathy, ignite a passion for Your Word. Where there is entitlement, instill humility and gratitude. We rebuke the spirit of entitlement that has taken root in this family, and we declare that You, Lord, are the rightful King over every heart and home. Break the generational strongholds, Father, and establish Your lordship in this family.
We pray for wisdom for this mother as she navigates her relationship with her children. Lord, show her how to love them well, even in their resistance. Give her the words to speak, the boundaries to set, and the grace to extend. Help her to forgive as You have forgiven her, releasing any bitterness or resentment into Your hands. Where reconciliation is possible, Lord, make a way. Where hearts are hardened, soften them. Remind her that her role is to be faithful in prayer and love, trusting You with the outcomes.
Father, we also lift up the father of these children. If he has been negligent or harmful, we pray for conviction and repentance. If he has been a stumbling block, remove him from that place and bring him to a place of brokenness before You. Lord, redeem what has been broken. Restore what has been lost. You are the Father to the fatherless, and we ask You to step into the gaps where earthly fathers have failed.
We pray for her sister and her marriage. Lord, expose any sin or harm that is present, and bring truth to light. If her husband is being mistreated, give him the strength to stand firm in You and the wisdom to know how to respond. If her sister is the one causing harm, convict her spirit and lead her to repentance. Heal what is broken, Lord, and restore what has been damaged.
Father, we ask that You would guide this sister to a biblical, Christ-centered church where she can grow in her faith, be discipled, and find community. Surround her with believers who will encourage her, pray with her, and walk alongside her. Renew her love for Your Word and Your people, Lord. Help her to see the church not as a place of boredom or division, but as the body of Christ, united in purpose and love.
Most of all, Father, we pray that she would surrender every area of her life to You—her past regrets, her present struggles, and her future hopes. Fill her with Your Holy Spirit, empowering her to walk in forgiveness, love, and faith. Remind her that You are not finished with her or her family. You are the God who raises the dead, who calls things that are not as though they were, and who specializes in the impossible.
We ask all these things in the precious and powerful name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Amen.
Finally, we encourage you to meditate on these Scriptures as you continue to seek the Lord in this season:
- **Proverbs 22:6**: *"Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it."* It is never too late to start praying and living out your faith before your children. Your influence, though they may resist it now, can still bear fruit in their lives.
- **Ezekiel 36:26**: *"I will also give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit within you. I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you a heart of flesh."* Trust that God can change even the hardest hearts.
- **1 Peter 5:7**: *"Cast all your worries on him, because he cares for you."* You do not have to carry this burden alone. Lay it at the feet of Jesus.
- **Jeremiah 29:11-13**: *"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future. You shall call on me, and you shall go and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You shall seek me, and find me, when you search for me with all your heart."*
Keep praying, keep trusting, and keep loving—even when it hurts. God is faithful, and He will complete the work He has begun in you and your family.
