We hear the deep pain, frustration, and weariness in your words, and our hearts ache with you. It is clear that you have faced immense hardship—unjust treatment, betrayal, loneliness, and even spiritual confusion. These trials are not small, and we do not dismiss them lightly. But we must address your question with both truth and compassion, for the stakes are eternal.
First, let us be clear: **Jesus Christ is not "useless."** He is the only way to the Father, the only name under heaven by which we must be saved (Acts 4:12). The Bible does not promise that following Christ will shield us from every hardship in this fallen world. In fact, Jesus warned His disciples, *"In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world"* (John 16:33 WEB). The presence of suffering does not negate God’s power or love—it often reveals our need for Him more deeply.
You mention feeling abandoned because you did not receive a job or a wife, and because those who claim to follow Christ have mistreated you. This is a profound wound, and we grieve with you. But consider this: **God’s silence or delayed answers are not His absence.** The psalmist cried out, *"How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?"* (Psalm 13:1 WEB), yet he still turned to God in his despair. Even when we do not understand His ways, we are called to trust Him. Proverbs 3:5-6 (WEB) says, *"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."* This does not mean life will be easy, but it does mean He is working—even when we cannot see it.
Now, let us address the specific struggles you’ve faced:
**1. Unfair Treatment and Legal Battles**
You took someone to court for unfair dismissal, and others rebuked you for it. Scripture does permit believers to seek justice (Luke 18:1-8), but we must examine our hearts. Were you seeking vindication for your own sake, or were you standing for righteousness? Proverbs 20:22 (WEB) says, *"Don’t say, ‘I will pay back evil.’ Wait for the Lord, and he will save you."* Vengeance belongs to God (Romans 12:19), and sometimes He allows injustice to refine us. This does not mean He approves of wrongdoing, but He may be using it to draw you closer to Him.
**2. Tithing and Prosperity**
You mentioned being told that God "cursed" you because you did not tithe. This is a distortion of Scripture. While tithing is a biblical principle (Malachi 3:10), God’s love is not transactional. He does not punish His children with suffering for missing a tithe. If you were misled in this way, we repent on behalf of those who twisted God’s Word to manipulate you. True giving flows from a heart of worship, not fear (2 Corinthians 9:7).
**3. Workplace Integrity vs. Worldly Success**
You were told you would not be hired because you refused to do illegal things. This is a test of your faith, and we praise God for your integrity! The world may reward compromise, but God honors those who stand for truth. *"Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven"* (Matthew 5:10 WEB). Your struggle is not in vain—it is a testimony to your commitment to Christ.
**4. Gaslighting and Guilt-Trapping**
The emotional abuse you’ve endured from those who claim to be believers is heartbreaking. Scripture warns us about wolves in sheep’s clothing (Matthew 7:15). Not everyone who names the name of Christ walks in His love. But do not let their hypocrisy drive you from the One who is true. Jesus Himself was betrayed by those closest to Him, yet He did not abandon His mission. You are not alone in this pain.
**5. The Question of Self-Reliance**
You asked if you should rely on yourself instead of God. The world will tell you that self-sufficiency is strength, but Scripture says the opposite: *"Apart from me, you can do nothing"* (John 15:5 WEB). Even in your exhaustion, God is your strength (Isaiah 40:31). The enemy wants you to believe that God has failed you, but the truth is that He is holding you even now.
**6. The Issue of Forbidden Affections**
You mentioned someone who has affection for you but is not a godly spouse. If this person is not a believer or if this relationship does not honor God’s design for marriage (one man, one woman, in covenant for life), then we must rebuke this in love. *"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers"* (2 Corinthians 6:14 WEB). God’s best for you is not just any companionship—it is a spouse who will walk with you in faith. If you are in a relationship that does not align with Scripture, we urge you to seek God’s will above your emotions.
Now, let us pray for you:
*Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts for our brother who is hurting. Lord, You see his pain, his weariness, and his questions. We ask that You would meet him in this place of doubt and draw him close to Your heart. Father, we repent on behalf of those who have misrepresented You—those who have twisted Your Word, those who have used guilt to manipulate, and those who have failed to show Your love. Forgive us, Lord, and heal the wounds they have caused.*
*Jesus, we declare that You are not useless. You are the Way, the Truth, and the Life. You are the Good Shepherd who lays down His life for the sheep. Even when our brother does not feel Your presence, we pray that he would know You are near. Restore his hope, Lord. Give him the strength to trust You even when life does not make sense.*
*We break the lies of the enemy that say You have abandoned him. We declare that You are working all things together for his good (Romans 8:28). We pray for justice in his workplace, for godly friendships, and for the right spouse—one who will love him as Christ loves the Church. Protect his heart from bitterness, and fill him with Your peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).*
*Lord, if there are areas where he has strayed from Your will, convict him gently and lead him back. If he is in a relationship that does not honor You, give him the courage to walk away. If he has hardened his heart toward You, soften it with Your love. We ask all these things in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, the only name by which we are saved. Amen.*
Brother, we do not offer empty platitudes. We know this road is hard. But we urge you: **Do not walk away from Jesus because of the failures of His followers.** The Church is full of broken people, but Christ is perfect. He is the only One who will never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5). The world will disappoint you, but He will not.
If you are willing, we encourage you to:
- **Seek godly counsel** from a pastor or mature believer who can walk with you through this season.
- **Spend time in Scripture**, even if it is just a few verses a day. Ask God to speak to you through His Word.
- **Forgive those who have wronged you**, not because they deserve it, but because Christ forgave you (Ephesians 4:32).
- **Wait on the Lord** for His timing in your job, your relationships, and your healing. His delays are not His denials.
You are not forgotten. You are not abandoned. You are deeply loved by the One who gave His life for you. Hold on to Him.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
