Growing up with a mother who is very religious, I was, from a very early age, exposed to churches. Remembering back on those times, I must have gone to 7 or more different churches because if my mom heard something that was against her understanding we would no longer attend that church. I used to hate going to church. In fact I wanted nothing to do with it at all. I felt so out of place if I had to be in church. In my teenage years I would not go anymore and what a relief that was for me. If someone would say to me "God loves you" i would cringe and think yea right.
Later on in my life I wanted to come to the Lord for I knew something was missing in my life. And when I would find myself in hard times I really wanted to be blessed by him. Praying to him Lord just help me out of this and I will do this or do that and even sometimes praying why Lord, why is this happing to me. Of course these hard times always passed and either some other hard time would happen or not and my need for God would go. I ran from him at the first sign of anything I could get out of this world, pleasure of the flesh.
For me, I found that I could not run from God forever. Living in the world brought and end to myself. When that end came my loving and wonderful Abba Father was there. Praise God. As God through the Holy Spirit started working in my life. I found once again that I had to come to the end of myself because I would mix Grace with the Law. Mixing the two, I was always wondering if I had enough faith when times where hard and when times where good I was wondering if I should be doing more to honor God for this good time I was in. Only to find that I was heaping more and more stress on myself.
As I said before in one of my other blog post that the a fire was put in me about the book of Romans. I just love that book. Anyway as I used to struggle with sin, one time after I had committed once again a sin that I had so much trouble with and the guilt, shame and self-condemnation came over me, a beautiful thing happened. As I was about to say oh Lord, I am so sorry, please help me, please deliver me from this, please don't be angry, give me time to work this out - before i said all of that to Him, his loved pored over me. It was amazing, and He said to me that He loved me so much even when I sin.
I really believe this is the first time I ever felt His Grace. There was no mistaking it, it was a powerful overwhelming feeling. After that time He has drawn me to learning how to let His mercy and grace be the focal point of my life - which is the blood of the Lamb, my savior Jesus Christ. I don't ever have to worry anymore if I have enough faith and did I do this or do that to receive these precious and powerful gifts from the Lord.
In a book of one of my favorite authors, he tells a story of the Passover in Egypt. God said "when I see the blood, I will pass over you." It was the blood that protected the Israelites not because they where good but because of the blood of the lamb. If they had failed to apply the blood, the first born would have not been spared. It did not matter if they where Israelites or Egyptian. They where not protected because they where Jews or because of good deeds and wonderful titles or because they where born of this nationality. It was based entirely on the blood of the lamb. And this speaks of the blood of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, the true Lamb of God.
So in this story there are two families that night of the passover. The first family, both father and son are firstborn children, the son asks his father, "Daddy, did you put the blood on the doorposts?" His Daddy says, "Yes, son, I have done as Moses instructed but I really hope that I have enough faith in the blood" The child says to the father "Daddy, Daddy, do you have enough faith?" The father says "I don't know" and the father shrugs helplessly. "I really don't know if I have enough faith in the blood." As they hear the screams and cries coming from the Egyptian houses, they hold each other tightly, trembling in fear throughout the night.
The second family, another firstborn father and son are waiting to pass this significant night. But in this household both father and son are singing praises and worshipping God. The father smiles at his son and says "Son, we have done what God told us to do. We have put the blood on the doorpost. Now, we leave the rest to Him. He will protect us. We don't have to fear." They too hear the screams and cries coming from the Egyptian houses, but they continue singing and praises and worshipping God.
The author of this story asks the questions. Which family was delivered? Which family was saved? The answer BOTH because of the blood. Not because of faith or non-faith but only because of the blood. But which family was under Grace? One family feared and suffered and the other was singing praises.
When you believe that it is the blood that saves you God sees that as faith in the blood. Yet. it is not having faith in the blood that saves you. It is the BLOOD ALONE that saves you. This taught me to stop wondering if I have enough faith and to just believe that it is His blood alone that saves, delivers, and blesses me. Praise God. And it is not His blood plus my own works (my own faith) or His blood plus me keeping the commandments that saves me. It is the BLOOD ALONE that saves.
How beautiful is that. Thank you Jesus. Praise God
Later on in my life I wanted to come to the Lord for I knew something was missing in my life. And when I would find myself in hard times I really wanted to be blessed by him. Praying to him Lord just help me out of this and I will do this or do that and even sometimes praying why Lord, why is this happing to me. Of course these hard times always passed and either some other hard time would happen or not and my need for God would go. I ran from him at the first sign of anything I could get out of this world, pleasure of the flesh.
For me, I found that I could not run from God forever. Living in the world brought and end to myself. When that end came my loving and wonderful Abba Father was there. Praise God. As God through the Holy Spirit started working in my life. I found once again that I had to come to the end of myself because I would mix Grace with the Law. Mixing the two, I was always wondering if I had enough faith when times where hard and when times where good I was wondering if I should be doing more to honor God for this good time I was in. Only to find that I was heaping more and more stress on myself.
As I said before in one of my other blog post that the a fire was put in me about the book of Romans. I just love that book. Anyway as I used to struggle with sin, one time after I had committed once again a sin that I had so much trouble with and the guilt, shame and self-condemnation came over me, a beautiful thing happened. As I was about to say oh Lord, I am so sorry, please help me, please deliver me from this, please don't be angry, give me time to work this out - before i said all of that to Him, his loved pored over me. It was amazing, and He said to me that He loved me so much even when I sin.
I really believe this is the first time I ever felt His Grace. There was no mistaking it, it was a powerful overwhelming feeling. After that time He has drawn me to learning how to let His mercy and grace be the focal point of my life - which is the blood of the Lamb, my savior Jesus Christ. I don't ever have to worry anymore if I have enough faith and did I do this or do that to receive these precious and powerful gifts from the Lord.
In a book of one of my favorite authors, he tells a story of the Passover in Egypt. God said "when I see the blood, I will pass over you." It was the blood that protected the Israelites not because they where good but because of the blood of the lamb. If they had failed to apply the blood, the first born would have not been spared. It did not matter if they where Israelites or Egyptian. They where not protected because they where Jews or because of good deeds and wonderful titles or because they where born of this nationality. It was based entirely on the blood of the lamb. And this speaks of the blood of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, the true Lamb of God.
So in this story there are two families that night of the passover. The first family, both father and son are firstborn children, the son asks his father, "Daddy, did you put the blood on the doorposts?" His Daddy says, "Yes, son, I have done as Moses instructed but I really hope that I have enough faith in the blood" The child says to the father "Daddy, Daddy, do you have enough faith?" The father says "I don't know" and the father shrugs helplessly. "I really don't know if I have enough faith in the blood." As they hear the screams and cries coming from the Egyptian houses, they hold each other tightly, trembling in fear throughout the night.
The second family, another firstborn father and son are waiting to pass this significant night. But in this household both father and son are singing praises and worshipping God. The father smiles at his son and says "Son, we have done what God told us to do. We have put the blood on the doorpost. Now, we leave the rest to Him. He will protect us. We don't have to fear." They too hear the screams and cries coming from the Egyptian houses, but they continue singing and praises and worshipping God.
The author of this story asks the questions. Which family was delivered? Which family was saved? The answer BOTH because of the blood. Not because of faith or non-faith but only because of the blood. But which family was under Grace? One family feared and suffered and the other was singing praises.
When you believe that it is the blood that saves you God sees that as faith in the blood. Yet. it is not having faith in the blood that saves you. It is the BLOOD ALONE that saves you. This taught me to stop wondering if I have enough faith and to just believe that it is His blood alone that saves, delivers, and blesses me. Praise God. And it is not His blood plus my own works (my own faith) or His blood plus me keeping the commandments that saves me. It is the BLOOD ALONE that saves.
How beautiful is that. Thank you Jesus. Praise God
