Disclaimer: This entry is very long and specifically focused on part of my homeless experience. May contain some grammatical and typographical errors.
My assignment can sometimes seem a bit overwhelming. I get so excited about the impartation and manifestation of His word that I know I can “sometimes” seem a little scatterbrained, just a little. Yet, just when I have seemingly exhausted every avenue of explanation He leads me to just the right passage through which to communicate His message. The naysayers’ on slot of critical rebuke and analysis: “Shut up!” “You’re overthinking it;” or “You’re trying too hard,” had begun to take stronghold. BUT GOD! Despite the negative feedback and constant barrage of criticism, God continues to illuminate His desired pathway for operating in my assignment.
The fact is that none of the naysayers know what God has told me to do, because they refuse to hear or do what it is that He has instructed them to do. Certainly, if they had ears to hear, instead of mocking, ridiculing, throwing me out of a homeless shelter, rebuking, and throwing me into jail, they would have simply heeded to pay attention to my public actions. Likewise, and even now, instead of casting me off and demonizing me, they would endeavor to listen and heed, per God’s instructions. Yet, I am aware that even in that is prophecy being brought to pass; though, in rebellion, the wrong side of prophecy, prophecy none the less. But those who hear and likewise do, according to God’s instructions, shall be among the remnant. Nevertheless, just as Ezekiel did, I too will continue to seek God’s confirmation before moving in any direction, because at the end of the day, if I fail to speak according to His instructions, nobody will be held responsible, but me.
Please forgive me if this is a bit “all over the place.” Even so, I think I’ll begin with this. I was working at a company called Compaq Computer Corporation (HP), in the mid nineties when God revealed the beginnings of my assignment to me. I had a vision concerning my homelessness. Now, at the time of the vision, of course, I gave no pause to it. I assumed it was just another dream. I was a young wife and mother, had a great job, and was a part-time student. So, if anything, I was perhaps stretched a little thin, and tired. It would be nearly 18 years before that vision would come to pass. In the dream, I was living on the streets of Houston, under a bridge known as “the Pierce Elevated,” in a cardboard box. I had cut a square opening in the box, and had hung up a set of dark blue, ruffled curtains. This detail is significant, because anybody who knows me, knows that I love to decorate and beautify my surroundings. That dream took place in 1997. Fast forward to 2015: while living in the homeless shelter, indeed I had hung a set of dark blue curtains in my room, which had been received as donation through the organization’s soup kitchen. Yet, there was no cardboard box, nor had the dream resurfaced in my mind. Howbeit, after being thrown out of the shelter in early 2016, I found myself, in fact, living on the streets of Houston, just outside the YMCA, a couple blocks from the Pierce Elevated, underneath a window seal (a cubby hole of sorts) with cardboard boxes positioned around about for privacy. Still the dream had not reenter my mind until I realized that I had hung a dark blue blanket over the boxes for added privacy and warmth (Glorrrryyyy!!!! The mere thought still takes me there).
In referencing Ezekiel 12 in a recent entry, I was reminded of yet another revelation that was given to me a while back. Though I had recounted much of what had happened to me and through me, as it relates to that passage of scripture. There were a couple components that I had purposefully omitted, concerned that I would, yet again, be accused of overreaching or trying too hard to prove myself. The words, “You don’t have to tell the whole story,” “You’re overthinking it,” and “It don’t take all that,” kept reverberating in my mind. But, none of that matters anymore; people are going to say what they’re going to say regardless. Unfortunately, God has already defined those who refuse to hear as a rebellious people. All along the way, while God was navigating my journey according to the narrative of The Daughter Zion, unbeknownst to me, He had also been navigating my assignment in the path of the Prophet Ezekiel. In revisiting the text, focusing on verses 5 and 6, I had to concede that I had not dug a hole in a wall through which I would escape from the city of Houston; nor had I hidden my face while leaving; or so I thought. But then I remembered the early part of 2017. Anticipation of Super Bowl LI was high and exhilaration had overtaken the City of Houston. Two days before the big game, as I sat in Bush International Airport, where I would spend the night, awaiting my ride out of town the next morning, quite naturally, the airport was bustling with fans entering the city. I watched for a while as hundreds of fans ascended from escalators and poured in from elevators. And perhaps some of those Falcon and Patriot can attest to this, because I was seated in a very open area. My ride wasn’t due until the following day, so I decided to try and get some sleep, but of course the noise level was, expectedly very high, and with the overhead lights glaring, it was difficult to relax, so I inserted my earplugs, and covered my head with a light blanket. Though I had not actually dug a hole, the root word of airport, “port,” in some context is defined as exit, passageway, opening (i.e. hole). In fact, not only had I left the city through a hole, to some degree, I had also covered my face. Keep in mind, I had never really read the book of Ezekiel to the extent that I was aware of those intricate details of his prophetic journey.
As if all these things were not confirmation enough, just when I had decided not to share these details because I could still hear the voice of cynics in my ear accusing me of negativity, saying things like: “You don’t have to share the whole story;” God stepped in, just as I was losing my Bible and guided my eyes to Ezekiel 12:11 “EXPLAIN that your actions are a sign to show what will soon happen to them, for they will be driven into exile as captives.” I had a major praise break over that one. CONFIRMATION – I had not been overthinking, nor was I being negative, and neither was I doing too much; I was and will continue to move exactly according to God’s will, seeking confirmation every step of the way, ensuring that I do not err in fulfilling my call. The text is negative to those who are unwilling to hear. But how gracious of God to forewarn us, He doesn’t have to do that. I can't force anybody to listen to me; but, once again, those who have ears to hear, will be counted among the remnant.
I understand people’s skepticism, even church folk. My journey in this assignment in particularly has been such a public phenomenon that it’s almost scary. So much of what I have experienced is so out there, that even though, in most instances, there were witnesses, if I told it all, no one, absolutely no one would believe me. Usually, my poor daughter is the only person in whom I have confided: There has to be an extra special blessing in store for her. Nevertheless, at God’s instructions I must speak about it.
Please excuse errors. As stated at the beginning, this may have been a little raggedy and all ove the place, but I was so excited about these and other revelations, I’m sure I left out some things. Yet there is much to come.
.
My assignment can sometimes seem a bit overwhelming. I get so excited about the impartation and manifestation of His word that I know I can “sometimes” seem a little scatterbrained, just a little. Yet, just when I have seemingly exhausted every avenue of explanation He leads me to just the right passage through which to communicate His message. The naysayers’ on slot of critical rebuke and analysis: “Shut up!” “You’re overthinking it;” or “You’re trying too hard,” had begun to take stronghold. BUT GOD! Despite the negative feedback and constant barrage of criticism, God continues to illuminate His desired pathway for operating in my assignment.
The fact is that none of the naysayers know what God has told me to do, because they refuse to hear or do what it is that He has instructed them to do. Certainly, if they had ears to hear, instead of mocking, ridiculing, throwing me out of a homeless shelter, rebuking, and throwing me into jail, they would have simply heeded to pay attention to my public actions. Likewise, and even now, instead of casting me off and demonizing me, they would endeavor to listen and heed, per God’s instructions. Yet, I am aware that even in that is prophecy being brought to pass; though, in rebellion, the wrong side of prophecy, prophecy none the less. But those who hear and likewise do, according to God’s instructions, shall be among the remnant. Nevertheless, just as Ezekiel did, I too will continue to seek God’s confirmation before moving in any direction, because at the end of the day, if I fail to speak according to His instructions, nobody will be held responsible, but me.
Please forgive me if this is a bit “all over the place.” Even so, I think I’ll begin with this. I was working at a company called Compaq Computer Corporation (HP), in the mid nineties when God revealed the beginnings of my assignment to me. I had a vision concerning my homelessness. Now, at the time of the vision, of course, I gave no pause to it. I assumed it was just another dream. I was a young wife and mother, had a great job, and was a part-time student. So, if anything, I was perhaps stretched a little thin, and tired. It would be nearly 18 years before that vision would come to pass. In the dream, I was living on the streets of Houston, under a bridge known as “the Pierce Elevated,” in a cardboard box. I had cut a square opening in the box, and had hung up a set of dark blue, ruffled curtains. This detail is significant, because anybody who knows me, knows that I love to decorate and beautify my surroundings. That dream took place in 1997. Fast forward to 2015: while living in the homeless shelter, indeed I had hung a set of dark blue curtains in my room, which had been received as donation through the organization’s soup kitchen. Yet, there was no cardboard box, nor had the dream resurfaced in my mind. Howbeit, after being thrown out of the shelter in early 2016, I found myself, in fact, living on the streets of Houston, just outside the YMCA, a couple blocks from the Pierce Elevated, underneath a window seal (a cubby hole of sorts) with cardboard boxes positioned around about for privacy. Still the dream had not reenter my mind until I realized that I had hung a dark blue blanket over the boxes for added privacy and warmth (Glorrrryyyy!!!! The mere thought still takes me there).
In referencing Ezekiel 12 in a recent entry, I was reminded of yet another revelation that was given to me a while back. Though I had recounted much of what had happened to me and through me, as it relates to that passage of scripture. There were a couple components that I had purposefully omitted, concerned that I would, yet again, be accused of overreaching or trying too hard to prove myself. The words, “You don’t have to tell the whole story,” “You’re overthinking it,” and “It don’t take all that,” kept reverberating in my mind. But, none of that matters anymore; people are going to say what they’re going to say regardless. Unfortunately, God has already defined those who refuse to hear as a rebellious people. All along the way, while God was navigating my journey according to the narrative of The Daughter Zion, unbeknownst to me, He had also been navigating my assignment in the path of the Prophet Ezekiel. In revisiting the text, focusing on verses 5 and 6, I had to concede that I had not dug a hole in a wall through which I would escape from the city of Houston; nor had I hidden my face while leaving; or so I thought. But then I remembered the early part of 2017. Anticipation of Super Bowl LI was high and exhilaration had overtaken the City of Houston. Two days before the big game, as I sat in Bush International Airport, where I would spend the night, awaiting my ride out of town the next morning, quite naturally, the airport was bustling with fans entering the city. I watched for a while as hundreds of fans ascended from escalators and poured in from elevators. And perhaps some of those Falcon and Patriot can attest to this, because I was seated in a very open area. My ride wasn’t due until the following day, so I decided to try and get some sleep, but of course the noise level was, expectedly very high, and with the overhead lights glaring, it was difficult to relax, so I inserted my earplugs, and covered my head with a light blanket. Though I had not actually dug a hole, the root word of airport, “port,” in some context is defined as exit, passageway, opening (i.e. hole). In fact, not only had I left the city through a hole, to some degree, I had also covered my face. Keep in mind, I had never really read the book of Ezekiel to the extent that I was aware of those intricate details of his prophetic journey.
As if all these things were not confirmation enough, just when I had decided not to share these details because I could still hear the voice of cynics in my ear accusing me of negativity, saying things like: “You don’t have to share the whole story;” God stepped in, just as I was losing my Bible and guided my eyes to Ezekiel 12:11 “EXPLAIN that your actions are a sign to show what will soon happen to them, for they will be driven into exile as captives.” I had a major praise break over that one. CONFIRMATION – I had not been overthinking, nor was I being negative, and neither was I doing too much; I was and will continue to move exactly according to God’s will, seeking confirmation every step of the way, ensuring that I do not err in fulfilling my call. The text is negative to those who are unwilling to hear. But how gracious of God to forewarn us, He doesn’t have to do that. I can't force anybody to listen to me; but, once again, those who have ears to hear, will be counted among the remnant.
I understand people’s skepticism, even church folk. My journey in this assignment in particularly has been such a public phenomenon that it’s almost scary. So much of what I have experienced is so out there, that even though, in most instances, there were witnesses, if I told it all, no one, absolutely no one would believe me. Usually, my poor daughter is the only person in whom I have confided: There has to be an extra special blessing in store for her. Nevertheless, at God’s instructions I must speak about it.
THANK YOU FOR THE LAMB
You are the miracle; be the blessing. Bless someone who can’t bless you back, as Jesus did for you.
You are the miracle; be the blessing. Bless someone who can’t bless you back, as Jesus did for you.
Please excuse errors. As stated at the beginning, this may have been a little raggedy and all ove the place, but I was so excited about these and other revelations, I’m sure I left out some things. Yet there is much to come.
.
