Martha Buthelezi
Servant of All
My husband's mother ### at home who is not so well but owns a house in which me (###), my husband (###), and my 12-year-old son (###) stay together with her in her house... She has high influence on my husband and my son don't even talk to me in a respectful manner; rather, the three of them think it's okay if you would not be there in our lives. They all are non-believers, and my husband and my son even wear evil eye thread in their necks. When I'm with them, I feel worried and lonely because I feel like I'm useless and of no value to them. Though I pray daily to Lord Jesus and bless them. Ask God to change me and change their behavior and heart towards me. My mother-in-law doesn't talk well about me with my son, and so my son does not treat me nicely and does not sit with me and talk, but still, I pray for her, but I feel shattered and broken. My husband earns well, and my son goes to a missionary Christian school, but still, they do not believe in God. My husband's business partner is female who is moreover like a boss over him. Her name is ###. She is Christian but neither she prays nor goes to church. She is another reason for my fear and insecurity in life... My husband says she is like an elder sister to him, but she also tries to influence him all the time and pretends to be what in actual life she is not; I mean, she always talks to my husband with respect and gracefully and does not do any work in the guest house which they own together; in fact, it's my husband who is doing everything because he knows the laws also, and the property has a legal case over it, so my husband has to look after everything from the bills to staff payment from building maintenance to its construction, each and every requirement, and that lady only enjoys the benefits from all of it. So, it's like neither at home nor outside in his business, I don't find a place for myself. He thinks I don't have a brain; I'm nothing as I don't own anything, not any building nor house. I don't have anything to give him anything; rather, he feels he feeds me, and it's because of his hard work I'm living a comfortable life. He says whatever comes to his mind in a very inappropriate manner. I cry, cry, and cry in front of the Lord... According to him, I have everything; what more should I ask for? But Lord, I don't have a happy family who laughs together, eats together; I'm lonely inside, that's the reason I started drinking wine one year back, and now I drink daily. My husband doesn't know about it, but I want to quit; please help save my family, my marriage, our relations with each other become strong, and give us a heart that's full of compassion, love, care, respect towards each other. I wanted to have a second baby, but he declined. I wear what he likes and try to talk to him in a respectful way, but sometimes I lose it all. God, please make me more tolerant and patient to deal with all these. I'm lost and aimless right now in my life; please, please help me and pray for me. I feel jealous and angry towards my mother and my husband's business partner, but I ask God to change me daily and make the person He wants me to become.
We pray in agreement with you. Isaiah 43:1-3; Isaiah 57:17; Psalm 91 read as a prayer daily. Ask God to cast out fear, anger, pain, depression, feeling alone and lost. Invite the Holy Spirit to embrace you. Use that alone time to read your Bible and pray quietly so that you can feel the presence of the Holy Spirit around you. Confess your sins daily. Human beings can isolate you, but God is always there holding your hand during your darkest hour; because in darkness, the light of God is always there, and darkness does not see the light. Hold on and hang in there. "Nothing can separate us from the love of God. God is our only source of hope and strength. Stand in front of the mirror and look at yourself; tell yourself that you are very beautiful and you love yourself. Appreciate the woman you are. You'll find that you suddenly fall in love with yourself again. Shalom!
