The Lord is doing so much in me right now, it is awesome. No, right now I do not feel awesome, in fact I am angry, frustrated, confused, and sad. However, I am amazed at the strength The Lord gives me.
Two attacks tonight with in 15 min. First, someone suggested I get Conner and the whole family tested for long term problems stemming from the Carbon monoxide poisoning. Second, my husband again came home late from work, and did not have his phone when I tried to call him. A bit of fear came in over the poisoning. A lot of anger frustration sadness, came in with husband.
The challenge from our bible study teacher was, this week react differently to a situation. The devil can not read our minds, but he has followed us around so long he knows how we react to certain situations. Most times I would react with confrontation, anger, tears, etc....I choose to take a drive, and talk to The Lord. He revealed to me my own words on this blog. I started praying hard for my husband, and thanking the Lord for him. I talked to him about my inability to completely give my husbands fidelity to Him. I ask Him how to live with a man I can not trust? This is what He put on my heart walk in obedience.
I large part of me still wanted to woller in the whys, hows, anger, and frustration. I wanted to go get one of the foods I am fasting. I certainly did not want to do this blog. I just kept thinking I have nothing to say.
A few months ago the wollering would have lasted at least two days. Tonight less than an hour. To me that is VICTORY. I am walking in obedience, I am writing this. The Lord has changed me. My emotions did not control my behavior.
Dear Lord, Thank You so much for changing me, my thoughts, my behaviors, and my perceptions. Thank You for allowing this little test, so I could see how much you have done. You are so Awesome. Thank You Jesus Amen
Two attacks tonight with in 15 min. First, someone suggested I get Conner and the whole family tested for long term problems stemming from the Carbon monoxide poisoning. Second, my husband again came home late from work, and did not have his phone when I tried to call him. A bit of fear came in over the poisoning. A lot of anger frustration sadness, came in with husband.
The challenge from our bible study teacher was, this week react differently to a situation. The devil can not read our minds, but he has followed us around so long he knows how we react to certain situations. Most times I would react with confrontation, anger, tears, etc....I choose to take a drive, and talk to The Lord. He revealed to me my own words on this blog. I started praying hard for my husband, and thanking the Lord for him. I talked to him about my inability to completely give my husbands fidelity to Him. I ask Him how to live with a man I can not trust? This is what He put on my heart walk in obedience.
I large part of me still wanted to woller in the whys, hows, anger, and frustration. I wanted to go get one of the foods I am fasting. I certainly did not want to do this blog. I just kept thinking I have nothing to say.
A few months ago the wollering would have lasted at least two days. Tonight less than an hour. To me that is VICTORY. I am walking in obedience, I am writing this. The Lord has changed me. My emotions did not control my behavior.
Dear Lord, Thank You so much for changing me, my thoughts, my behaviors, and my perceptions. Thank You for allowing this little test, so I could see how much you have done. You are so Awesome. Thank You Jesus Amen