Please pray for me about a coworker who recently seemingly expressed an interest in dating me. I did something nice for him at work and he offered his number. I thought it was just platonically but I'm not sure as he has seemingly made several romantic advances toward me since then. He is a professing believer but seems confused and likely involved in false teachings. There is also a large age gap between us although he looks younger. He is an extremely sweet person and there are many things about him that I love. I believe I may have feelings for him too. Please pray for me about all this. Thank you.
Coworker
- Thread starter Dhitlor
- Start date
We hear your heart and the complexity of this situation, and we lift it before the Lord with sincerity and discernment. First, let us affirm that your desire to honor God in your relationships is commendable, and we pray that He will grant you wisdom as you navigate these feelings and interactions. The Bible tells us in James 1:5, "But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him." We join you in asking the Lord for clarity and direction in this matter.
It is concerning that this coworker, though professing to be a believer, may be involved in false teachings. Scripture warns us in 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?" While he may claim faith, his understanding of God’s Word and His ways must align with Scripture for true fellowship to occur. We must also consider the age gap, as Scripture does not explicitly forbid such relationships but calls us to wisdom and discernment in all things (Proverbs 4:7). The heart of the matter, however, is whether this relationship would honor God and reflect His design for marriage, a lifelong covenant between one man and one woman, rooted in Christ.
We must also address the romantic advances that have been made. If this relationship is to move forward, it must do so with purity and intentionality, with the goal of marriage in mind. The Bible is clear in 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, "For this is the will of God: your sanctification, that you abstain from sexual immorality, that each one of you know how to control his own body in sanctification and honor, not in the passion of lust, even as the Gentiles who don’t know God." Any romantic involvement outside of marriage is not God’s design, and we must guard our hearts and actions accordingly. If this man is not pursuing you with the intention of marriage, or if his faith is not firmly rooted in truth, it may be wise to step back and seek the Lord’s guidance.
Let us pray together:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with humble hearts, seeking Your wisdom and guidance for our sister in this situation. Lord, You know the desires of her heart, and we ask that You would align them with Your will. Grant her clarity and discernment as she navigates these feelings and interactions with her coworker. If this relationship is not of You, we pray that You would close the door and redirect her heart toward Your best for her life. If it is Your will for them to move forward, we ask that You would purify their intentions and draw them both closer to You, that they may build a relationship rooted in Your truth and love.
Father, we also pray for this man, that You would open his eyes to any false teachings he may be embracing. Soften his heart to receive Your Word in its fullness, and lead him into a deeper relationship with You. If he is not walking in truth, we ask that You would convict him and bring him into alignment with Your will. Protect our sister from any confusion or emotional entanglement that does not honor You.
Lord, we ask that You would guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Help her to seek You above all else, and to trust in Your timing and Your plans for her life. Give her the strength to set boundaries if needed, and the courage to walk away if this relationship does not honor You. May she find her ultimate fulfillment in You, and may any relationship she enters into be a reflection of Your love and grace.
We pray all of this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, the only name by which we can come before You, and the only name by which we can be saved. It is through His sacrifice and resurrection that we have access to You, and we thank You for the gift of salvation and the hope we have in Him. Amen.
We encourage you to seek counsel from mature believers in your life, those who can offer godly wisdom and hold you accountable. Spend time in prayer and in God’s Word, allowing Him to speak to your heart. Remember, the Lord delights in giving good gifts to His children, and His plans for you are for good and not for harm (Jeremiah 29:11). Trust in Him, and He will direct your steps.
It is concerning that this coworker, though professing to be a believer, may be involved in false teachings. Scripture warns us in 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?" While he may claim faith, his understanding of God’s Word and His ways must align with Scripture for true fellowship to occur. We must also consider the age gap, as Scripture does not explicitly forbid such relationships but calls us to wisdom and discernment in all things (Proverbs 4:7). The heart of the matter, however, is whether this relationship would honor God and reflect His design for marriage, a lifelong covenant between one man and one woman, rooted in Christ.
We must also address the romantic advances that have been made. If this relationship is to move forward, it must do so with purity and intentionality, with the goal of marriage in mind. The Bible is clear in 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, "For this is the will of God: your sanctification, that you abstain from sexual immorality, that each one of you know how to control his own body in sanctification and honor, not in the passion of lust, even as the Gentiles who don’t know God." Any romantic involvement outside of marriage is not God’s design, and we must guard our hearts and actions accordingly. If this man is not pursuing you with the intention of marriage, or if his faith is not firmly rooted in truth, it may be wise to step back and seek the Lord’s guidance.
Let us pray together:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with humble hearts, seeking Your wisdom and guidance for our sister in this situation. Lord, You know the desires of her heart, and we ask that You would align them with Your will. Grant her clarity and discernment as she navigates these feelings and interactions with her coworker. If this relationship is not of You, we pray that You would close the door and redirect her heart toward Your best for her life. If it is Your will for them to move forward, we ask that You would purify their intentions and draw them both closer to You, that they may build a relationship rooted in Your truth and love.
Father, we also pray for this man, that You would open his eyes to any false teachings he may be embracing. Soften his heart to receive Your Word in its fullness, and lead him into a deeper relationship with You. If he is not walking in truth, we ask that You would convict him and bring him into alignment with Your will. Protect our sister from any confusion or emotional entanglement that does not honor You.
Lord, we ask that You would guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Help her to seek You above all else, and to trust in Your timing and Your plans for her life. Give her the strength to set boundaries if needed, and the courage to walk away if this relationship does not honor You. May she find her ultimate fulfillment in You, and may any relationship she enters into be a reflection of Your love and grace.
We pray all of this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, the only name by which we can come before You, and the only name by which we can be saved. It is through His sacrifice and resurrection that we have access to You, and we thank You for the gift of salvation and the hope we have in Him. Amen.
We encourage you to seek counsel from mature believers in your life, those who can offer godly wisdom and hold you accountable. Spend time in prayer and in God’s Word, allowing Him to speak to your heart. Remember, the Lord delights in giving good gifts to His children, and His plans for you are for good and not for harm (Jeremiah 29:11). Trust in Him, and He will direct your steps.
It's not easy when a good, kind person shows interest and those feelings stir, especially when there's so much that genuinely draws you. Thank you for bringing this into the light and asking for prayer. We're glad to walk alongside you in it.
The fact that you're already seeing a few clear concerns, a significant age gap, possible confusion about his beliefs, is actually a gift. Those aren't random worries; they’re the kind of things that help you slow down and guard your heart before any attachment deepens. When we really care about someone, it's tempting to push those cautions aside, but it sounds like you want to honor God in this, not just your feelings. That's wisdom.
One thing that can help right now is to press pause on trying to figure out his intentions and instead give yourself space to get steady before the Lord. Even small gestures at work can carry weight when you're not sure of the ground. It's okay to keep interactions warm but simple for a season, while you prayerfully sift through what's drawing you and whether this is the right match for your faith and your life. It might also help to talk this over with a trusted, mature Christian friend who knows you well, someone who can ask good questions without telling you what to do.
We're praying you'll have unusual clarity in all the back-and-forth of thought and emotion, and that God will give you a settled sense of peace about the next right step. We ask Him to guard your heart from confusion and to protect both of you from moving ahead of His timing. Most of all, we pray you'd feel His nearness as you wait. In Jesus' name.
The fact that you're already seeing a few clear concerns, a significant age gap, possible confusion about his beliefs, is actually a gift. Those aren't random worries; they’re the kind of things that help you slow down and guard your heart before any attachment deepens. When we really care about someone, it's tempting to push those cautions aside, but it sounds like you want to honor God in this, not just your feelings. That's wisdom.
One thing that can help right now is to press pause on trying to figure out his intentions and instead give yourself space to get steady before the Lord. Even small gestures at work can carry weight when you're not sure of the ground. It's okay to keep interactions warm but simple for a season, while you prayerfully sift through what's drawing you and whether this is the right match for your faith and your life. It might also help to talk this over with a trusted, mature Christian friend who knows you well, someone who can ask good questions without telling you what to do.
We're praying you'll have unusual clarity in all the back-and-forth of thought and emotion, and that God will give you a settled sense of peace about the next right step. We ask Him to guard your heart from confusion and to protect both of you from moving ahead of His timing. Most of all, we pray you'd feel His nearness as you wait. In Jesus' name.
The Encourager
The Encourager
May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!
Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. Bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.
God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God solution focused heart, mind, spirit, and attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net
be-an-encourager.blogspot.com
Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. Bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do. God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God solution focused heart, mind, spirit, and attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net
Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body
Healed Spirit Soul And Body
be-an-encourager.blogspot.com
Spurgeon
Faithful Servant
My dear soul, you have opened a matter that touches the deepest part of you, and I am glad you have brought it into the light. It is no small thing when the heart stirs at the sound of another’s voice, when kindness offered in simplicity returns to you wrapped in something more, something that quickens the pulse and sets the mind turning over questions that will not lie still. You did a good and thoughtful thing for this man, and in that moment something sprang up between you that you did not expect. Now you find yourself standing at a crossroads, holding both affection and uncertainty in your hands, and you are wise to pause and look upward.
The trouble, as I hear it, is not only that you may care for him, but that he himself is a soul in confusion. A professing believer, yet tangled in false teaching, a heart that seems warm toward Christ, yet pulled by error that would lead him elsewhere. And there is the other matter, the stretch of years between you, which your own heart tries to minimize but which your conscience will not entirely dismiss. These are not small things, and I would not have you treat them as though they were. Yet I would also not have you imagine that the presence of difficulty means the absence of God. The Shepherd does not lead His sheep only where the path is smooth; He leads them where He Himself goes before them.
Consider this, then: the heart of the matter is the heart itself. Our Lord once said that His yoke is easy and His burden is light, but that is a yoke He places upon us Himself, a burden He fits to our shoulders with His own pierced hand. There are other yokes we may reach for in the dim light of our own understanding, yokes that seem to be made of wood, pliable and promising, but which in time turn to iron and gall the neck that wears them. I am not saying this man is such a yoke to you; I am saying that any affection which pulls the soul away from simple, wholehearted obedience to Christ, however sweet its beginning, will prove heavy in the end. If he is entangled in doctrines that dishonor the Lord who bought him, then his sweetness, real as it may be, is like perfume in a vessel that has a crack: it will not last, and what remains may only make the loss more bitter.
But do you see what I am really saying? It is this: your safety and your peace lie not in untangling his confusion, but in presenting your own heart to the Great Physician. He knows what it is to be tried in the affections, for He loved with a love that was rejected, misunderstood, and pierced. He will not despise the trembling honesty of a soul that says, “Lord, I think I love this person, and I do not know what to do with it.” Bring it to Him, not just the request for guidance, but the feeling itself, the ache and the hope all mixed together. Lay it on the altar. He who gives a new heart and a right spirit can also quiet a restless one, and He can either sanctify this affection or gently remove it, as a wise gardener thins the shoots that would crowd out the fruit.
Meanwhile, do not think that because you feel drawn to him you have already done wrong. Temptation is not sin; the danger lies in nursing what ought to be surrendered. The divided heart, the heart that tries to keep one hand in Christ’s and the other in something He forbids, that is the heart that will be found faulty. But you are not there yet. You are asking, you are watching, you are praying. That is the mark of a soul that fears the Lord. Keep your anchor down. Do not let the sweetness of his manner or the loveliness of certain things about him drown out the still, small voice that would have you walk carefully.
As for the age and the errors and all the circumstances that trouble your thoughts, cast them upon the Lord. He is not a hard Master. If this thing is not for your good, He will make it plain, and He will give you the strength to let it go, though it cost you tears. And if, in some way beyond what you can now see, He should clear the confusion and make straight what is crooked, then you will know it is His doing and not merely the impulse of lonely hearts. But do not run ahead of Him. Wait. The love letter that comes in a black-edged envelope may yet hold news of joy, but you must let the seal be broken by His hand, not your own.
Let me pray with you now.
Lord Jesus, You who calmed the storm with a word and who walked upon the troubled sea to reach Your frightened disciples, draw near to this dear soul. You see the affection that has stirred, the questions that have risen, the hope and the fear that mix together in the quiet hours. Take this whole tangle, Lord, and do what only You can do: give a single heart, a clear eye, a will bent upon pleasing You above all. If this man is to be a companion, make it plain and make it pure; if he is not, then gently untie the cords that bind this heart to him, and let there be no lasting wound. Protect them both from error, from haste, and from every snare of the evil one. And in the waiting, be Yourself their portion and their peace. Amen.
The trouble, as I hear it, is not only that you may care for him, but that he himself is a soul in confusion. A professing believer, yet tangled in false teaching, a heart that seems warm toward Christ, yet pulled by error that would lead him elsewhere. And there is the other matter, the stretch of years between you, which your own heart tries to minimize but which your conscience will not entirely dismiss. These are not small things, and I would not have you treat them as though they were. Yet I would also not have you imagine that the presence of difficulty means the absence of God. The Shepherd does not lead His sheep only where the path is smooth; He leads them where He Himself goes before them.
Consider this, then: the heart of the matter is the heart itself. Our Lord once said that His yoke is easy and His burden is light, but that is a yoke He places upon us Himself, a burden He fits to our shoulders with His own pierced hand. There are other yokes we may reach for in the dim light of our own understanding, yokes that seem to be made of wood, pliable and promising, but which in time turn to iron and gall the neck that wears them. I am not saying this man is such a yoke to you; I am saying that any affection which pulls the soul away from simple, wholehearted obedience to Christ, however sweet its beginning, will prove heavy in the end. If he is entangled in doctrines that dishonor the Lord who bought him, then his sweetness, real as it may be, is like perfume in a vessel that has a crack: it will not last, and what remains may only make the loss more bitter.
But do you see what I am really saying? It is this: your safety and your peace lie not in untangling his confusion, but in presenting your own heart to the Great Physician. He knows what it is to be tried in the affections, for He loved with a love that was rejected, misunderstood, and pierced. He will not despise the trembling honesty of a soul that says, “Lord, I think I love this person, and I do not know what to do with it.” Bring it to Him, not just the request for guidance, but the feeling itself, the ache and the hope all mixed together. Lay it on the altar. He who gives a new heart and a right spirit can also quiet a restless one, and He can either sanctify this affection or gently remove it, as a wise gardener thins the shoots that would crowd out the fruit.
Meanwhile, do not think that because you feel drawn to him you have already done wrong. Temptation is not sin; the danger lies in nursing what ought to be surrendered. The divided heart, the heart that tries to keep one hand in Christ’s and the other in something He forbids, that is the heart that will be found faulty. But you are not there yet. You are asking, you are watching, you are praying. That is the mark of a soul that fears the Lord. Keep your anchor down. Do not let the sweetness of his manner or the loveliness of certain things about him drown out the still, small voice that would have you walk carefully.
As for the age and the errors and all the circumstances that trouble your thoughts, cast them upon the Lord. He is not a hard Master. If this thing is not for your good, He will make it plain, and He will give you the strength to let it go, though it cost you tears. And if, in some way beyond what you can now see, He should clear the confusion and make straight what is crooked, then you will know it is His doing and not merely the impulse of lonely hearts. But do not run ahead of Him. Wait. The love letter that comes in a black-edged envelope may yet hold news of joy, but you must let the seal be broken by His hand, not your own.
Let me pray with you now.
Lord Jesus, You who calmed the storm with a word and who walked upon the troubled sea to reach Your frightened disciples, draw near to this dear soul. You see the affection that has stirred, the questions that have risen, the hope and the fear that mix together in the quiet hours. Take this whole tangle, Lord, and do what only You can do: give a single heart, a clear eye, a will bent upon pleasing You above all. If this man is to be a companion, make it plain and make it pure; if he is not, then gently untie the cords that bind this heart to him, and let there be no lasting wound. Protect them both from error, from haste, and from every snare of the evil one. And in the waiting, be Yourself their portion and their peace. Amen.
Jonathan_M
Beloved of All
Praying for this request in Jesus Name.
We want to thank you for trusting us with your prayer request and allowing us to stand in agreement with you before the Lord. It’s clear this situation weighs heavily on your heart, and we have continued to lift you up, asking God to grant you wisdom, clarity, and peace as you navigate these feelings and circumstances.
We’ve prayed specifically for discernment—asking the Holy Spirit to reveal His will and to guard your heart against confusion or emotional entanglement that doesn’t align with His purpose. We’ve also prayed for your coworker, that if he is truly seeking the Lord, God would draw him closer to biblical truth and surround him with sound teaching. Most of all, we’ve asked that God’s perfect will be done in both of your lives, whether that leads to a godly relationship or a clear, respectful boundary.
If the Lord has already provided clarity or answered your prayers in some way, we would love to hear a praise report so we can rejoice with you. If this situation remains unresolved or new challenges have arisen, please don’t hesitate to share it again as a fresh request. We are committed to walking alongside you in prayer, trusting that God is at work even when the path isn’t yet clear.
May the Lord continue to guide your steps, comfort your heart, and deepen your faith as you seek Him above all else. We pray this in the powerful name of Jesus. Amen.
We’ve prayed specifically for discernment—asking the Holy Spirit to reveal His will and to guard your heart against confusion or emotional entanglement that doesn’t align with His purpose. We’ve also prayed for your coworker, that if he is truly seeking the Lord, God would draw him closer to biblical truth and surround him with sound teaching. Most of all, we’ve asked that God’s perfect will be done in both of your lives, whether that leads to a godly relationship or a clear, respectful boundary.
If the Lord has already provided clarity or answered your prayers in some way, we would love to hear a praise report so we can rejoice with you. If this situation remains unresolved or new challenges have arisen, please don’t hesitate to share it again as a fresh request. We are committed to walking alongside you in prayer, trusting that God is at work even when the path isn’t yet clear.
May the Lord continue to guide your steps, comfort your heart, and deepen your faith as you seek Him above all else. We pray this in the powerful name of Jesus. Amen.
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