D
Deni356
Guest
Bless all of you who helped me pray for my son to return home and helping me get through a very lonely holiday without a phone call from my son.
He has called me twice this morning - and is planning on calling me again later today - I have more hope today than yesterday and with God and prayers believe in my heart he & I can restore what has been broken through too many life challenges -that changed both of our lives forever - May God hear my prayer and grant mercy upon my soul that I might be a better person through all that has changed my life forever - and continue my walk with Jesus - knowing that divine intervention is necessary, more strength to continue and wisdom to choose the right words when necessary in order to find peace of mind and harmony again in my home. God knows my mind - my hearts desires - He knows how much he gave me and trusted me with - so much it became way to overwhelming for me to process yet somehow every day he has also given me - what I need - to climb over the mountain knowing that with hope nothing can be permanently destroyed - nor taken - for I live a humble life - and my needs are not for material items - just health, well-being and trust to sustain me in life -
This is my post from yesterday - I ask that you continue to pray with me - for salvation that no one or anything can ever break again - in the name of Jesus I pray.
This is my 1st Easter alone - I am in my 50's, have already been forced to live through so many adversities in life after loosing three family members; one my oldest son who was only 29 - died the very day I had started a new job four years ago - from there I had to sell things to live, rely on the state for assistance, move - have surgery - be hired for four jobs and let go within a few weeks after fulfilling a full corporate career that sustained me as a single Mother - My son and I transitioned and I was told by my doctors to apply for SSI hoping I'd return to work in Sept. 2010 yet the 4 treating doctors while I was admitted 4 times to the hospital for a rare heart condition where surgery can not be done to help me - cognitive issues from a lesion on my brain, lung issues, Fibro and stomach issues - now on a fixed income -was able to lease a small apartment for myself and my son and now my son has abruptly moved out since February and has changed so much in a few weeks. He's staying with friends and I was hoping this would resolve and he would come back home but it hasn't - in fact he has more anger then I ever imagined him to have - and I do not see the reason. His father was an abusive alcoholic who died two years ago - and we lived apart for 11 years. I'm a give - I give to help others and now I sit here alone - wondering what will be. This sadness has taken over me - and I'm at threat of loosing this apt. come June. My son needs to grow up - he's left behind his cat and seems so harsh - there is just no approaching him at all.
Please pray for mercy to the Lord. Please pray that I find the wisdom and am blessed with ways to keep this apt. on my own. Please pray that this sadness leave - for I know in my heart I was a good mother who is being treated in a bad way over an immature son. Please Lord I bow my head down and say enough of this - to know that I've had great faith and have climbed so far back to life this feels like a waking nightmare daily. My friends are gone - most of them walked away months after my family members passed as if death was contagious - I'm no longer going out to a busy office to distract myself nor do I have the strength. In Jesus name I ask all of you to pray with me for favor that my head stays high - and I do not loose what I have gained in the past two years. Amen and God bless all who pray.
Deni
He has called me twice this morning - and is planning on calling me again later today - I have more hope today than yesterday and with God and prayers believe in my heart he & I can restore what has been broken through too many life challenges -that changed both of our lives forever - May God hear my prayer and grant mercy upon my soul that I might be a better person through all that has changed my life forever - and continue my walk with Jesus - knowing that divine intervention is necessary, more strength to continue and wisdom to choose the right words when necessary in order to find peace of mind and harmony again in my home. God knows my mind - my hearts desires - He knows how much he gave me and trusted me with - so much it became way to overwhelming for me to process yet somehow every day he has also given me - what I need - to climb over the mountain knowing that with hope nothing can be permanently destroyed - nor taken - for I live a humble life - and my needs are not for material items - just health, well-being and trust to sustain me in life -
This is my post from yesterday - I ask that you continue to pray with me - for salvation that no one or anything can ever break again - in the name of Jesus I pray.
This is my 1st Easter alone - I am in my 50's, have already been forced to live through so many adversities in life after loosing three family members; one my oldest son who was only 29 - died the very day I had started a new job four years ago - from there I had to sell things to live, rely on the state for assistance, move - have surgery - be hired for four jobs and let go within a few weeks after fulfilling a full corporate career that sustained me as a single Mother - My son and I transitioned and I was told by my doctors to apply for SSI hoping I'd return to work in Sept. 2010 yet the 4 treating doctors while I was admitted 4 times to the hospital for a rare heart condition where surgery can not be done to help me - cognitive issues from a lesion on my brain, lung issues, Fibro and stomach issues - now on a fixed income -was able to lease a small apartment for myself and my son and now my son has abruptly moved out since February and has changed so much in a few weeks. He's staying with friends and I was hoping this would resolve and he would come back home but it hasn't - in fact he has more anger then I ever imagined him to have - and I do not see the reason. His father was an abusive alcoholic who died two years ago - and we lived apart for 11 years. I'm a give - I give to help others and now I sit here alone - wondering what will be. This sadness has taken over me - and I'm at threat of loosing this apt. come June. My son needs to grow up - he's left behind his cat and seems so harsh - there is just no approaching him at all.
Please pray for mercy to the Lord. Please pray that I find the wisdom and am blessed with ways to keep this apt. on my own. Please pray that this sadness leave - for I know in my heart I was a good mother who is being treated in a bad way over an immature son. Please Lord I bow my head down and say enough of this - to know that I've had great faith and have climbed so far back to life this feels like a waking nightmare daily. My friends are gone - most of them walked away months after my family members passed as if death was contagious - I'm no longer going out to a busy office to distract myself nor do I have the strength. In Jesus name I ask all of you to pray with me for favor that my head stays high - and I do not loose what I have gained in the past two years. Amen and God bless all who pray.
Deni
