It is a beautiful thing to see your love for the body of Christ and your desire to commit to a local church. The church is not merely a building or an institution but the living, breathing bride of Christ, called to worship Him in spirit and truth. We rejoice with you in this step of faith, for Scripture tells us, *"Let us consider how to provoke one another to love and good works, not abandoning our own assembly together, as the custom of some is, but encouraging one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching"* (Hebrews 10:24-25, WEB).
However, we must also address your hesitation about the pastor. Leadership in the church is a serious matter, for pastors are called to shepherd God’s flock with integrity, humility, and sound doctrine. The apostle Paul instructs Timothy, *"Don’t lay hands hastily on anyone, and don’t share in others’ sins. Keep yourself pure"* (1 Timothy 5:22, WEB). If you have concerns about the pastor’s character, teaching, or conduct, these should not be ignored, for *"a little yeast grows through the whole lump"* (Galatians 5:9, WEB). A pastor must meet the qualifications outlined in Scripture, including being *"blameless, the husband of one wife, sober, sensible, modest, hospitable, good at teaching; not a drinker, not violent, not greedy for money, but gentle, not quarrelsome, not covetous; one who rules his own house well, having children in subjection with all reverence"* (1 Timothy 3:2-4, WEB). If there are clear, biblical reasons to question his fitness for leadership—such as false teaching, moral failure, or abuse of authority—then joining this church could place you under unhealthy spiritual influence.
Before making a decision, we urge you to pray earnestly and seek wisdom from God, who promises to give it generously: *"But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach; and it will be given to him"* (James 1:5, WEB). Spend time in Scripture, examining the church’s teachings and practices in light of God’s Word. If possible, speak with mature believers you trust—outside of this church—who can offer discernment. Ask the Lord to reveal His will clearly, whether that means joining this church, addressing your concerns with the leadership in a biblical manner, or seeking another body of believers where you can grow in faith and serve wholeheartedly.
If your hesitation stems from personal preferences rather than biblical concerns—such as stylistic differences or minor disagreements—then we encourage you to submit those to the Lord. Unity in the church is precious, and *"above all things, have intense love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins"* (1 Peter 4:8, WEB). However, if the issues are doctrinal or moral, do not compromise. The health of your soul is at stake.
Let us pray together for you:
Heavenly Father, we lift up our brother/sister to You, thanking You for their love for Your church and their desire to commit to a local body of believers. Lord, You know the heart of this pastor and the state of this church. We ask that You grant our friend wisdom, discernment, and courage to see clearly what is pleasing to You. If this church is a place where Your Word is faithfully taught, Your name is honored, and Your people are loved, then remove every doubt and confirm their step of faith. But if there is deception, sin, or error in the leadership, expose it, Lord, and guide them away from harm. Lead them to a church where they can grow in truth, serve with joy, and be shepherded by godly leaders. Protect them from compromise, and fill them with Your peace as they seek Your will. May their love for Your church always be rooted in love for You, for it is in the name of Jesus Christ, our Chief Shepherd, that we pray. Amen.
We also encourage you to reflect on whether you have shared your concerns with the pastor or elders in a spirit of humility and love, as Scripture commands: *"Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently"* (Galatians 6:1, WEB). If the issue is one that can be addressed biblically, consider approaching the leadership with a heart seeking reconciliation and truth. But if the pastor is unrepentant in sin or heresy, then it is right to separate yourself, for *"what fellowship has light with darkness?"* (2 Corinthians 6:14, WEB).
May the Lord guide you into His perfect will, and may you find a church home where you can thrive in faith, hope, and love.