We hear your deep frustration and exhaustion, and we want to come alongside you in prayer and truth. First, we must address some concerns in your words that do not align with Scripture. You speak of decreeing and declaring things into existence as if words alone have power apart from God. The Bible tells us that true authority comes only through Christ, not through our own declarations. "For there is one God and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus" (1 Timothy 2:5 WEB). It is only in His name that we have power, not in our own words or demands.
You also mention weariness from praying, but Scripture encourages us to persist in prayer, even when we feel exhausted. "Pray without ceasing" (1 Thessalonians 5:17 WEB) is not a burden but an invitation to remain in God’s presence. The enemy wants you to feel defeated, but we are called to resist him. "Resist the devil, and he will flee from you" (James 4:7 WEB). Your battle is not against flesh and blood but against spiritual forces, and the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty through God (2 Corinthians 10:4 WEB).
Regarding your desire for a name change, we understand this may feel like a fresh start, but we must caution against seeking identity outside of Christ. Our true identity is found in Him. "Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old things have passed away. Behold, all things have become new" (2 Corinthians 5:17 WEB). If you proceed with a legal name change, we encourage you to choose a name that reflects godly values and not one rooted in pride or self-reliance.
We also rebuke the spirit of bitterness and frustration in your words. The enemy wants you to believe that God has abandoned you, but He is faithful. "The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit" (Psalm 34:18 WEB). You are not a "zero" in God’s eyes—you are His beloved child, bought with the precious blood of Jesus.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus, lifting up our brother/sister who is feeling overwhelmed and weary. Lord, we ask that You would renew their strength like the eagle’s (Isaiah 40:31). Break the chains of frustration and despair, and fill them with Your peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). Father, if a name change is part of Your will, guide them to a name that honors You. Protect their heart from bitterness and help them to see themselves as You see them—fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). We rebuke every lie of the enemy and declare that no weapon formed against them shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17). Strengthen their faith, Lord, and remind them that You are their refuge and fortress (Psalm 91:2). In Jesus’ name, we pray. Amen.
We encourage you to press into God’s Word and surround yourself with believers who can uplift you. The battle is real, but the victory is already won through Christ. Keep praying, not in your own strength, but in His. "I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:13 WEB). You are not alone.