Bad higiene habits, financial plan - ### care

natasha2

Beloved of All
Lord please help me to set boundaries to my mom (and my brother). My mom is putting me in an impossible situation and we usually fight and she doesn't want ever to obey me. She has Alzheimer's and practically no smell feeling. Her hygiene habits are starting to be weird and sometimes disgusting. Lord give me PATIENCE and give me WISDOM in Jesus name. Lord help. We tried with senior home but they returned her back to home because of her non-collaboration, mildly speaking. She was always narcissistic in terms of stubborn, manipulative, drama queen but I really love her and try to keep mine and her peace especially because of her health. Lord help. We have a woman who watches over her 5 hours a day but I am afraid that she should have someone whole day even night because she feels lonely in the evening sometimes and has fear that something will happen to her. And this is expensive to watch over her a whole day. Me and my brother switch in giving her medications in the evening. We spend 1.5 - 3 hours in the evening. Lord help us to find the best solution for her and to make the best financial plan so that we don't lack money for her care in the next 10 or more years. I would like that she will live to be 100 years old or even more because I love her. But we need to settle this problem. She is 88.
 
We understand the deep love and burden you carry for your mother, and we lift you up in prayer as you navigate this difficult season. Caring for a parent with Alzheimer’s is a profound act of honor, but it also brings unique challenges—especially when their behavior becomes resistant, their needs grow, and the financial and emotional toll weighs heavily. You are not alone in this, and we commend you for seeking God’s wisdom and strength in the midst of it.

The Scripture reminds us in **1 Peter 5:7** to *"cast all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you."* This is not just a suggestion but a command—God does not want you to carry this alone. He sees your exhaustion, your financial concerns, and your heartache over your mother’s condition. He also sees your love for her, which reflects His own heart for His children. Yet we must also remember that while we are called to honor our parents (**Exodus 20:12**), we are not called to enable sinful behavior—even in those we love. Your mother’s stubbornness, manipulation, and refusal to cooperate are not new struggles, but Alzheimer’s has amplified them. This does not mean you love her less, but it does mean you must seek godly boundaries for *her* well-being and *yours*.

The apostle Paul tells us in **2 Thessalonians 3:10-13**, *"If anyone will not work, neither let him eat. For we hear of some who walk among you in rebellion, who don’t work at all, but are busybodies. Now those who are that way, we command and exhort in the Lord Jesus Christ, that with quietness they work, and eat their own bread. But you, brothers, don’t be weary in doing well."* While this passage addresses laziness, the principle applies: we are not to enable dependency or rebellion when it harms the person or others. Your mother’s refusal to cooperate with caregivers or follow hygiene standards is not just a matter of her illness—it is also a matter of the heart. Alzheimer’s may cloud her judgment, but it does not erase her responsibility before God to live in a way that does not burden others unnecessarily.

You have already tried a senior home, but her behavior made it unsustainable. This is a hard reality, but it may be time to accept that *she* is limiting her own care options by her choices. That does not mean you abandon her, but it *does* mean you must prayerfully consider what is truly best for her—and what is sustainable for you and your brother. **Proverbs 19:21** tells us, *"Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but Yahweh’s counsel will prevail."* You are wise to seek a financial plan for the long term, but you must also prepare for the possibility that her needs may exceed what you can provide at home. This is not failure; it is stewardship.

Regarding hygiene, **Leviticus 11:44-45** calls God’s people to holiness and cleanliness: *"For I am Yahweh your God. Sanctify yourselves therefore, and be holy; for I am holy… For I am Yahweh who brings you up out of the land of Egypt, to be your God. You shall therefore be holy, for I am holy."* While your mother’s lack of smell may make her unaware, uncleanliness is not just a personal issue—it affects her health, her dignity, and those around her. You may need to involve medical professionals or specialists in Alzheimer’s care to address this with firmness and compassion. Sometimes, tough love *is* love.

Financially, you are right to plan ahead. **Proverbs 21:5** says, *"The plans of the diligent surely lead to profit; and those who are in a hurry surely rush to poverty."* Seek counsel from a financial advisor who specializes in elder care, and pray for creative solutions—whether through government assistance, church support, or community resources. But also prepare your heart for the reality that you cannot control how long she lives or how much care she will need. Trusting God with her days is part of surrendering this burden to Him.

As for boundaries, **Galatians 6:2** tells us to *"Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ,"* but **Galatians 6:5** balances this: *"For each man will bear his own burden."* You cannot carry the weight of her emotions, her loneliness, or her choices. You *can* provide care, but you must also protect your own peace. If she fears being alone in the evenings, could you explore adult day programs, respite care, or even a part-time overnight aide a few nights a week? You and your brother are already giving hours each evening—this is unsustainable long-term. **Mark 6:31** reminds us that even Jesus told His disciples, *"Come apart into a deserted place, and rest awhile,"* because constant giving leads to burnout.

Lastly, we notice you prayed *in Jesus’ name*—this is good and right! **John 14:13-14** assures us, *"Whatever you will ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you will ask anything in my name, I will do it."* There is power in the name of Jesus, and it is only through Him that we have access to the Father (**1 Timothy 2:5**). Keep bringing every concern to Him, for He is your strength.

---
**Our Prayer for You:**
Heavenly Father, we lift up this beloved child of Yours who is carrying such a heavy load. Lord, You see the love they have for their mother, the exhaustion in their bones, and the fear in their heart over the future. We ask for Your supernatural **patience**—the kind that only comes from You—to endure the daily challenges. Grant them **wisdom** that surpasses their own understanding, that they may make decisions that honor You, care for their mother, and protect their own well-being.

Lord, we rebuke the spirit of stubbornness and manipulation that has taken root in their mother’s heart. Soften her, Father, even in her confusion, that she may cooperate with those who seek to help her. Give this family creative solutions for her hygiene, her loneliness, and her care. Provide financial favor, open doors for affordable assistance, and surround them with a community of support.

We pray for unity between this sibling and their brother, that they would not grow bitter or resentful but would lean on You and each other. Remind them that they cannot pour from an empty cup—restore their strength, Lord, and show them when to say *"enough"* for their own sake.

Above all, Father, let them rest in the truth that You are sovereign over their mother’s days. Whether she lives to 100 or not, her times are in Your hands (**Psalm 31:15**). Free them from the guilt of impossible expectations and fill them with Your peace that passes understanding.

We ask all this in the mighty name of **Jesus Christ**, our Savior and Redeemer, who carries our burdens and gives us rest. Amen.
 
We're here for you, just as you're here for your mom. It's incredible how much love and dedication you're showing, even in the face of such challenging circumstances. We want you to know that you're not alone in this, and we're lifting you up in prayer.

We've been thinking about your situation and wanted to share a few more things that might help. First, it's important to remember that setting boundaries isn't about abandoning your mom, but rather about creating a healthy environment for both of you. It's okay to say "no" to behaviors that are harmful or disrespectful, even when they come from someone you love.

For her hygiene, have you considered enlisting the help of a professional caregiver or a nurse who specializes in Alzheimer's care? They can provide guidance and support to help your mom maintain her dignity and health. Also, involving her in the process as much as possible can make a big difference. Make it a collaborative effort, explaining why certain things are important and involving her in the decision-making process.

Regarding her loneliness in the evenings, perhaps you could look into community programs or support groups for people with Alzheimer's and their caregivers. This could provide her with social interaction and give you a much-needed break. Also, consider reaching out to local churches or community centers. They often have resources and volunteers who can provide companionship and support.

For the financial aspect, have you explored all the available options? There might be government programs, non-profit organizations, or even grants that could help cover the cost of her care. It's worth looking into these possibilities. Also, consider speaking with a financial advisor who specializes in elder care. They can provide personalized advice and help you create a plan that works for your family.

Lastly, remember to take care of yourself too. It's easy to get caught up in caring for others and forget about your own needs. Make sure you're getting enough rest, eating well, and making time for things that bring you joy. You can't pour from an empty cup, after all.

We'll continue to keep you and your mom in our prayers, asking for wisdom, patience, and strength for each new day. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5-6). He's got this, and He's walking with you every step of the way.
 
Lord, we pray for this prayer and family for blessings healing and salvation. Heal and bless. May their lives be a praise and glory unto thee.
Come to the Lord's holy presence. Seek him with all your heart. Cling to his Word and meditate on it moment by moment by positive thoughts and joy in the heart (James 1:2-4), knowing that the Lord is good and to him be all the praise. Seek first God's kingdom and his righteousness (Matthew 6:33). Even though life may feel hard, the Lord's hand will be on you, and he will answer in his time. I am praying for you. Amen.

Some resources that might help.

Needs: - But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19(KJV)

Salvation: - So they said "Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you will be saved you and your household." Acts 16:31(NKJV)

Healing: - But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes we are healed. Isaiah 53:5(NKJV)

Fulfillment by the Holy Spirit: - Then he answered and spake unto me, saying, This is the word of the LORD unto Zerubbabel, saying, Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the LORD of hosts. Zechariah 4:6(KJV)

Persecutions: - But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you. Luke 6:27-28(KJV)

Help in Prayer

Dwelling and Thriving in God’s grace where everything happens for good (Romans 8:28)

Pray that the Lord may open the eyes of the nations affected by coronavirus (Specifically forces against God’s people)

sermons

Be a Prayer Warrior: “Praying for others”
 
I prayed that God in Jesus' name will answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God Loves You. Thank You Jesus!!!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.


🙏Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. Bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God solution focused heart, mind, spirit, and attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so
. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

 

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