Brother, I joined you in your prayer for God's Help and Guidance. May the Lord answer your prayers, draw you close to Him and restore your soul. Amen
Even David, The Man After God's Own Heart cried this out to God just as our Lord did on the cross...
My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, so far from the words of my groaning? O my God, I cry out by day, but you do not answer, by night, and am not silent. Yet you are enthroned as the Holy One; you are the praise of Israel. In you our fathers put their trust; they trusted and you delivered them. They cried to you and were saved; in you they trusted and were not disappointed. But I am a worm and not a man, scorned by men and despised by the people. (Psalm 22:1-6)
How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me? Look on me and answer, O LORD my God. Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death; my enemy will say, "I have overcome him," and my foes will rejoice when I fall. But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, for he has been good to me. (Psalm 13:1-6)
O Lord, how long will you look on? Rescue my life from their ravages, my precious life from these lions. I will give you thanks in the great assembly; among throngs of people I will praise you. (Psalm 35:17-18)
I say to God my Rock, "Why have you forgotten me? Why must I go about mourning, oppressed by the enemy?" My bones suffer mortal agony as my foes taunt me, saying to me all day long, "Where is your God?" Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. (Psalm 42:9-11)
It's not wrong to ask God why. In the end all we can do is give him praise for the fact that he is God and Creator of all things. His will is sovereign.
He went away a second time and prayed, "My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done." (Matthew 26:42)
Maybe this old commentary from David Wilkerson about David's discouragements can help you.
"When You Come to The End of Yourself!" by David Wilkerson, founding pastor of Times Square Church, New York City - December 28, 1998
In the end David always comes back to Praising the Glory of God.
May God Bless your heart and soul today.
