We hear the deep pain and loneliness in your heart, and we grieve with you over the years of rejection, betrayal, and isolation you’ve endured. Your cry for change is one we bring before the Lord, but we must first address some critical truths from Scripture to align your heart with God’s will.
You speak of creating your own happiness, demanding change, and even questioning whether you should expect "a good one" after past hurts. Yet the Bible warns us not to lean on our own understanding (Proverbs 3:5-6) or to demand our will as if we have authority over God’s sovereign plan. Scripture says, *"Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."* You cannot "speak into existence" what only God can ordain. Instead, surrender your pain to Him and trust His timing.
You mention being "muted, destroyed beyond belief" and attribute your loneliness to Satan and evil forces. While spiritual warfare is real (Ephesians 6:12), we must remember that God’s power is greater. *"Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you"* (James 4:7). Your focus should not be on cursing the past or those who wronged you but on seeking God’s healing and restoration.
Your words also reveal a dangerous bitterness toward men and the world, even suggesting that others "shouldn’t make it to the next world" because of how they’ve hurt you. This is not the heart of Christ, who said, *"Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who mistreat you and persecute you"* (Matthew 5:44). Unforgiveness will only chain you to the past. Release this anger to God, who judges righteously (Romans 12:19).
Regarding relationships, you express a desire for someone "available spiritually all the way to the physical." We must caution you: Scripture is clear that intimacy is reserved for marriage (Hebrews 13:4), and marriage is a covenant between one man and one woman (Genesis 2:24). If you’ve been physically intimate outside of marriage, repent and seek purity. *"Flee sexual immorality! Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body"* (1 Corinthians 6:18). God’s design is for your protection and joy.
You also mention being "tired of being alone," but loneliness is not always an indication of God’s displeasure. Even Jesus withdrew to solitary places (Luke 5:16), and Paul learned contentment in every circumstance (Philippians 4:11). If God has called you to a season of singleness, use it to grow closer to Him. *"The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit"* (Psalm 34:18).
Finally, we notice you didn’t invoke the name of Jesus in your plea. There is no other name by which we are saved (Acts 4:12), and no prayer is heard apart from Him (John 14:6). If you haven’t surrendered your life to Christ, we urge you to do so today. *"If you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved"* (Romans 10:9).
**Let us pray for you:**
Heavenly Father, we lift this beloved sister to You, broken and weary from years of pain. Lord, heal her heart from the wounds of rejection and betrayal. Break the chains of bitterness, unforgiveness, and despair that have held her captive. Fill her with Your peace that surpasses understanding and remind her that her worth is found in You alone.
Father, if there has been sin—whether in unforgiveness, resentment, or physical impurity—we ask for conviction and repentance. Wash her clean by the blood of Jesus and restore her to a place of holy surrender.
Lord, if it is Your will, bring godly, Christ-centered men into her life who will honor her as Your daughter. But first, prepare her heart to trust You above all else. Help her to see this season not as punishment but as preparation.
We rebuke every lie of the enemy that tells her she is unlovable or beyond hope. Satan has no authority over her life—Jesus does. We declare that her future is in Your hands, and You will restore what the locusts have eaten (Joel 2:25).
In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray. Amen.
Sister, we encourage you to seek Christian counseling and a strong, Bible-believing church. Surround yourself with believers who can speak truth into your life. God has not forgotten you—He is working even now. *"For I know the plans that I have for you,’ says Yahweh, ‘plans for peace, and not for evil, to give you hope and a future"* (Jeremiah 29:11). Hold onto Him.